Just Wondering - May, 2008

Where’s my sock? It’s not in the hamper, the washer or the dryer. Is it inside the corner of the sheet? Or did it find an escape route? Has my sock made it to the great outdoors? Did it aspire to greater heights, like being a windsock? How did it get out of jail free? I picture the scene in “Shawshank Redemption” (one of my favorite movies), where Tim Robbins makes it through 500 yards of sewage to escape from prison, ends up in a pool of water, rips off his shirt and hollers to the sky because he is finally free. I realize this might not be as dramatic when the protagonist is a sock, but it kind of conjures up that image. At least to me. Too much time on my hands, I know.

Why do I have to keep straightening the pictures hanging on the wall of the bathroom? It’s not like I live in an earthquake zone, where things shake, rattle and roll constantly. But three pictures in this one particular room seem to move around. What’s that about?

For that matter, why does the rug next to my bed move? It is on the carpet, which you would think would keep it in place, but doesn’t.

Why can’t all credit card machines be the same? Some you have to sign on the machine, some require signing on paper, some require no signing at all. You have to hold the card this way or that way. Can’t all of these devices be the same? It would certainly save time.

I changed four light bulbs in three lamps recently. Why do they seem to burn out at the same time? I can understand the two bulbs in one lamp, since they are on at the same time, but how did the lamp in the family room know to burn out the day before the one in the living room? I have the same issue with batteries, too.

Do you wake up with a song running though your mind that you can’t get out of your head? I either wake up with one or one pops into my head and I can’t get rid of it all day. My repertoire of these songs is nothing if not strange. A sample:

Daddy’s Little Girl
I’ll Tumble For You (Boy George)
Wabash Cannonball
Baby, I’m a Want You (Bread).
Besame Mucho
Theme from Flashdance (What a Feeling)
Billy, Don’t Be a Hero (Maybe because Billy Crystal signed a one-day contract and appeared in a spring training game for the Yankees?)
How Lovely to Be a Woman (from Bye, Bye Birdie; this makes no sense)

Wouldn’t some scientist want to monitor my brain for these songs alone?

My electric toothbrush died recently, so I went on-line to get a new one. At Amazon they list several models, which are available new and used. USED? Who wants a used toothbrush? What’s the text say? “Barely used, nearly new, one owner, low mileage.” Even just the replacement heads are available new and used. Yuck.

In case you were wondering, my GPS system and I are still having “relationship issues.” Driving along an interstate not long ago, I apparently neglected to obey an unspoken command. She freaked out, declaring, “recalculating” four times in a row. In GPS parlance, that’s something akin to “Houston, we have a problem.” She then directed me to make an immediate left. Hey, I told her – and out loud, at that – I am on an interstate highway. There are no lefts here! The fact that I am writing this will lead you to believe that I am no longer lost, which is true. But we still aren’t speaking. As for me, I’m sticking close to home.

Finally, I am still wondering why the Macy’s 1-Day sale takes place on two days.