Holiday Musings 2021

Let’s start this month’s collection with the realization that since I started doing this blog in 2007, soon after my retirement from Johnson & Johnson, I have published 339 entries. That includes random thoughts, essays and movie reviews. Even I have to admit that is quite a collection of nonsense. This would be a good time to let me know if you want to drop off the list because you don’t have time for one more email or you find you aren’t reading them anyway. I will clean up my list and remove your name if that’s your choice – no offense taken!

After 50 years of sharing almost everything, my best friend and I recently had a conversation about our favorite socks. Have we officially run out of things to talk about? I get it: She was peeved because one of the socks in her favorite pair escaped, mysteriously reappeared, and then disappeared again. I started washing my socks in a mesh bag to stop my socks from getting away and that works. We also discussed our mutual dislike of socks that slip down into our shoes. Everyone hates that, right? But this is what happens after 53 years of friendship – Sock Talk!

Do you ever get mad that you weren’t invited to something you didn’t want to attend in the first place?

“On November 13, Felix Unger was asked to remove himself from his place of residence. That request came from his wife.” That’s from the opening of the TV show “The Odd Couple,” and what a perfect way to start the show.

I was thinking about other shows that featured similarly clever – and informative – openings. “She had style, she had flair, she was THERE, that’s how she became ‘The Nanny’’’ is another opening that tells you the premise of the show. As much as I detest “Gilligan’s Island,” the annoying song that starts the show tells you all that you need to know, though it can never explain how the Harlem Globetrotters found their way onto and off of that island! “Love is All-Around” is the theme of “The Mary Tyler Moore Show,” and if that song doesn’t bring a smile to your face, I’m not sure we can be friends. And then there’s, “Welcome back, your dreams were your ticket out...” to kick-off “Welcome Back Kotter.” Kevin Arnold was able to get by with a little help from his friends on “The Wonder Years,” and I’m still partial to the theme song from “American Hero” (“Believe it or not, I’m walking on air; I never thought I could feel so free”), even though it didn’t really describe the show itself.

No one who ever watched “The Andy Griffith Show” can pass up the chance to whistle the opening tune, and how many of us have sung along to “The Love Boat,” that haven for B-list TV stars cruising together? The premise for “The Beverly Hillbillies” is pretty well established in the opening lines, which go on to tell you about how once he struck oil, old Jed was encouraged by his kinfolk to move to Beverly – Hills, that is, swimming pools, movie stars.

Speaking of songs, today in the nail salon I enjoyed listening to Christmas music. One of the songs sounded so familiar yet different. I realized it was a slower, more melodic version of that annoying song by Alvin & the Chipmunks, “The Chipmunk Song.” Played in a different way, it isn’t half bad. And it didn’t stick in my head the rest of the day!

Let the record show that I admit that I will never understand photosynthesis. Please, don’t even try to explain it to me. I just appreciate the beauty of the trees every fall. I don’t need to know why they change color.

I don’t know the magic behind those color catchers that you throw into your load of laundry that soak up the vibrant colors and prevent your underwear from turning pink – except that they work.

One night I decided to delete old text messages from my sister, and, by the time I was done, at least 2000 of them were trashed. The number of times we have exchanged existing plans for our days was miniscule compared to how many times we told each other what we were making for dinner, how we felt that day and that we were about to “hop” into the shower. We are well-matched for the mundane activities of our lives!

It was a good day for me in the supermarket. First, a woman asked me to reach a can of German potato salad from the shelf and I was able to grab it for her. (Who knew German potato salad came in a can? And who would pick ME to reach it? That was a desperate – and SHORT – woman!) And second, I was able to open three produce bags without any hesitation (or licking my fingers). That’s a big day for me! And who knew that there was something called a “Personal watermelon? I found it in ShopRite, near a bunch of round, green fruit labeled “Melogold Grapefruit.” When I posted this information on Facebook, I was told that the latter are like pomelos, which sounds to me like a cross between pomegranates and melons. But that’s not the case. I wonder what else I have been missing.

I waited so long in the exam room for the doctor last week that I really thought she forgot about me and went out to lunch. But no, the doctor came in and examined me eventually. Can’t get out of that one.

Don’t you hate it when you are in someone’s house and they tell you not to look around because the place is a mess and you know it looks better than your place even after it has been cleaned? Or you tell them they look nice in their outfit and they declare it as some old rag they would never have worn had they known someone was coming.

Remember when you would go on a cruise or stay in a hotel and two little candies would magically arrive on your pillow at night? Now there aren’t even bedspreads, and you sure don’t want someone walking into your room. And I’m not sure I want to spend my vacation with a couple of thousand people on a cruise ship right now. But I sure do miss those candies, however.

I haven’t quite adjusted to the fact that the Lord & Taylor store at Bridgewater Commons closed permanently during the pandemic. I don’t know where to go for a dressy dress when I eventually need one. But adding insult to injury, the store will be used as a megasite for vaccine distribution. That kind of breaks my heart just a little.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas – and has been since before Halloween, when Christmas trees went on display at Costco. The other way you can tell is by the arrival of the “Holiday Edition” catalogs, first the “Early Holiday” or “Holiday Preview” versions and then the full-fledged holiday catalogs. This means that if you have ever bought anything from Omaha Steaks, you will get their catalog, along with Harry & David’s fruits and treats, Wolferman’s for their muffins and baked goods and a myriad of catalogs from places where I have never shopped, like The Sharper Image or Hammacher’s. My recycling bundle this month is twice its normal size!

Hanukah was so early this year that it was over by December 5. For the first time ever, I decided to light up my electric menorah anyway. After all, many people keep their Christmas decorations and lights up until after New Year’s Day, so why not light that menorah even though Hanukah is officially over?

One of the highlights of my month was going to the State Theater in New Brunswick – my first of any kind of show since the pandemic began – to see Cirque Holidaze, featuring Ben Broughton, son of my dear friend Colleen. Although we had never met before, I’m always up-to-date on his performing career and proud as any "aunt" could be. I’ve seen Colleen, who lives in Redmond, Washington, twice in the last 15 years, yet we correspond frequently and keep those bonds of friendship strong. It was great to meet Ben in person after his sensational performance in a jump-rope troupe in this magical show. I hugged him a few times and requested that he share one of them with Colleen. I think I smiled all night – except for lamenting the fact that they was no Playbill to send to Colleen or to add to my collection that goes back to shows from the 60s!

And just like that…STOP READING IF YOU DON’T WANT SPOILERS ABOUT THE NEW VERSION OF SEX & THE CITY. Just like that, our 50ish heroine arrives at the sumptuous apartment she shares with her husband, Big, and finds him in the midst of what appears to be a heart attack. And just like that, she calls 911, right? What? No? Has this woman never seen an episode of “Grey’s Anatomy?” questions my dear friend Marie, who has seen every one of the 20 years worth. No, she kisses him, ruining her expensive and treasured Manolo Blahnik shoes from her wedding as she hugs him in the shower instead of trying CPR. I know we are supposed to see Carrie dating again in her 50s, so having Big as her husband would no longer work, but couldn’t they have found any other way to knock him off besides keeling over after pedaling his Peloton and not getting the first aid he needed?

My next entry in this series will be my Movies & More reviews for December and the year. So, until then, enjoy the holidays and don’t go crazy prepping for them. Let’s hope for better times when we are safely with friends, family and all our loved ones this holiday season and in the new year! Thanks for reading.

November 2021 Movies & More

I'm trying to end the year with a flourish and managed to see 15 movies or TV series in November. Numbering picks up from previous months and an asterisk indicates that I haven't seen the show previously. Everything is rated from 0-5 cans (for the first time), with 5 being the top.

143.  The Gift* (2000, On Demand – free) – If I were semi-psychic Annie Wilson (Cate Blanchett), I’d return the gift. Annie, a young widow with three boys living meagerly in the south, does card readings for the locals for extra income. She also has detailed dreams and premonitions about bad things that are going to happen to the people of the town, and some of them are determined to make those dreams come true. The last movie I watched like this was “The Sixth Sense,” because this type of movie is not the genre I prefer. But I have to say that the stellar cast (Keanu Reeves, Katie Holmes, Greg Kinnear and Hilary Swank) does a great job, and the Australian Blanchett carries off a Southern accent as well as the mighty Meryl Streep. 3 cans.
144.  Tupperware!* (2004, PBS American Experience; I watched on PBS Documentaries, which requires a subscription) – Who doesn’t own Tupperware? The ubiquitous plastic food storage containers were invented by a man named – you guessed it – Earl Tupper in the 1950s. Initially sold in stores, the product really took off when a woman named Brownie Wise (seriously, that was her real name) convinced Mr. Tupper to abandon stores in favor of home parties. At the time, women were once again relegated to the kitchen despite their important presence during WWII, so conducting parties to sell products was a way for them to socialize and make some money. Brownie took over sales and became renowned as one of the few female executives of her time. This movie is not exactly a blockbuster (and I have seen a documentary on Blockbuster, too), but it is a great reflection of the times that features some degree of female empowerment. Brownie was quite a character! 3 cans.
145.  Land* (2021, HBO) – There’s getting away from it all and then there’s this movie, where a forelorn Robin Wright (who also produced and directed) retreats to a remote location in Wyoming to live absolutely alone and on her own. Clearly, some event in her past has spurred this decision, so she ditches her phone and moves into a cabin with enough supplies – so she thinks – to eke out a solitary existence. But when circumstances turn dire and it looks like she won’t make it, she is fortunate to be found by a nurse (what a coincidence!) and a local man named Miguel (Dermian Bichir) who becomes a friend and teaches her how to survive. Wright gives a terrific performance as a grief-stricken woman determined to keep her distance from society, but you question whether she really wants to live at all. There’s very little dialog in the first part of the movie, and no volleyball for her to befriend, a la “Castaway,” as she tries to figure out how to make the best of her surroundings. 3½ cans.
146.  Queen Bees* (2021, Showtime) – When Mean Girls leave high school and get really old, they wind up in retirement homes like Pine Gardens, where independent senior citizen Helen (Ellen Burstyn) agrees to move for a month while the house she accidentally set on fire is being repaired. She’s a widow with her own way of doing things, asking little from anyone, but she is immediately rejected by the “cool kids” at the new abode who won’t let her sit at their table in the dining room and who reject her from the bridge club. The mean girls are led by an acerbic Jane Curtain and her nicer cohorts, played by Loretta Devine and Ann-Margret. These ladies can be a little rowdy, when they start flirting with the handsome young aqua aerobics instructor or chasing old men in the home, looking for husband #6. But Helen finds a good guy in Dan (an aging James Caan), who she teaches to dance. This is a sweet and mostly gentle movie – apart from a scene when Curtain’s character knees a purse snatcher in the groin – and it isn’t as silly as something like “Poms,” but I’m still waiting to see a movie that depicts older people living together without the cliches and would-be cuteness typically included in these movies. Burstyn, as always, gives a top-flight performance. 3 cans.
147.  Tumbledown* (2015, Prime Video) – Ted Lasso goes to Maine in this better-than-Hallmark rom-com. Andrew McDonald (Jason Sudeikis) travels to Maine to write about a singer-songwriter whose accidental death has made him larger than life. Andrew, a professor and writer, wants to include him in his new book about less-well-known artists. Hannah, the anguished widow (Rebecca Hall), cannot get through her grief and sees Andrew’s work as a way to express her loss, so she invites him – albeit a little reluctantly – to collaborate with her on the tome. Of course, she lives in a quaint and quirky town with off-beat characters, and, like Ted Lasso, Andrew is a fish-out-of-water, hailing from NYC. As can be expected, sparks do fly. You will have to tune in to get the rest of the story – and it is worth it. Not quite worth 4 cans, but somewhere over 3½.
148.  Diana* (2021, CNN) – In case there is anything you didn’t already know about the life and death of Diana, the Princess of Wales and mother of the future King of England, here it is, in all its smarmy glory. Based largely on the recordings made by Diana in interviews with biographer Andrew Morton, this documentary does make you feel sorry for Diana. She really thinks she is marrying Prince Charming, but Charles doesn’t quite carry off that title, especially since he keeps former girlfriend Camilla around throughout the ill-fated marriage. Diana is young and innocent, but she grows beautifully into her role as a woman of style and substance even amid her unhappiness. Diana is a popular subject in our culture right now, with a dreadful musical on Broadway (with the film version available on Netflix) and as a main character in the most recent season of Netflix’ “The Crown.” My advice: Let the poor woman rest in peace. 3½ cans.
149.  Dear Evan Hansen* (2021, On Demand and also available in theaters) – I was absolutely enthralled by the original stage version of this musical, but now, knowing the plot and the songs, it is hard to determine if the magic was missing because of the familiarity of the story and the music or because the Broadway show was just better. Truly, it is almost impossible to replicate the feeling of a stage production, when the lights go down and the orchestra music comes up and the performers command the stage. I’m stalling here, because I did like the movie and don’t want to say anything really bad about it, so let’s stick to the facts. Ben Platt recreates his stage role as Evan Hansen, a high school student with few friends and no confidence. Connor, another boy in his school, has similar issues, but he is more aggressive, and when he finds a letter written by Evan to himself at the direction of his therapist, he steals the “Dear Evan Hansen” paper. The misunderstandings of this act lead the characters to conclusions and down paths they shouldn’t be on. This is a sad story but too typical of the drama of high school, where the fight for acceptance, the fight not to get lost, is part of everyday life. When Connor’s family accepts Evan and wants more about the assumed friendship between them, Evan is eager to help them by providing details of a friendship that never existed. The plaintive tunes and heartbreaking lyrics were better served live, but the cast does a good job here (although Ben Platt looks a little long in the tooth to be a high school student, unless he is The Fonz). I watched the movie with someone who never saw the Broadway version and only knew the story as “about a kid wearing a cast.” She liked it, but clearly not as much as I liked my initial exposure to the show. See it for yourself, whether or not you have seen it live on Broadway, and let me know what YOU think. 4 cans.
150.  Shall We Dance? (2004, Hulu) – Richard Gere is John, a lawyer whose train trip home to his loving wife Beverly (Susan Sarandon) passes the window of Miss Mitzi’s Dance Studio. When he spies the lovely Paulina (Jennifer Lopez), he is smitten and signs up for dance lessons. This movie is one where you really hope the main characters don’t go off the rails and have an affair. Gere is just a little awkward in life and on the dance floor as he learns the moves and seeks more joy – which is the central theme here. There is one scene near the very end that makes every woman I know sigh audibly. A sweet, somewhat comical and charming movie. 3½ cans.
151.  Wait For Your Laugh* (2017, Netflix) – It turns out that everything I knew about the life and times of the late comedian Rose Marie wasn’t much at all. This documentary traces her start as a precocious 4-year-old with the voice of a woman who starred as a singer. As she grew older – never really hitting that stage when child stars become forgotten as adults – she played clubs from New York to the nascent Las Vegas, where only the Flamingo Hotel offered a venue. She was a true entertainer, someone who danced and sang and did comedy bits to broaden her act. She also became friends with mobsters from New York to Chicago to Las Vegas, all of whom liked and respected her and made sure she was protected. Contrary to her man-chasing comedy writer role as Sally Rogers on the classic “Dick Van Dyke Show” (offered the job by producer Carl Reiner, Rose Marie quipped, “What’s a Dick Van Dyke?”), she was happily married and had a daughter – and she rarely stopped working. I came away with a whole new sense of admiration for a woman who succeeded as a singer and comedian in what was largely a male-dominated profession. Worth watching. 3½ cans.
152.  King Richard* (2021, HBO Max and in theaters) – How do you become a true champion in any field? Well, it helps if your father has decided your fate before you are born and ties every action taken on every single day of your life to achieving that goal. Meet the Man with the Plan, Richard Williams (Will Smith), father of tennis champions Venus and Serena Williams, who got their start on the courts of Compton, California, not at a tennis academy or in an affluent area. Williams had a master plan and stuck to it, drilling and coaching his willing pupils, even surviving beatings by local punks who did not want him to succeed. Meanwhile, he and his wife held down full-time jobs and raised the entire family, not just the two future champs. To say he was driven is an understatement. Did he succeed? Both Venus and Serena won all the major championships, and Serena is considered by some to be not just the best FEMALE tennis player of all-time, but simply the best tennis player, PERIOD (though this movie focuses most of the attention on Venus, the older sister). King Richard’s techniques could best be described as unconventional, and his approach overbearing, but it worked. Now we need a movie about the sisters themselves (who serve as producers of the film) and not their father. 3½ cans.
153.  Captain Fantastic* (2016, Netflix) – If you guessed that this is one of those superhero blockbusters that I generally avoid, you would be wrong. The “superhero” here is a man raising his many kids completely off the grid, educating them, teaching them to speak multiple languages, climb mountains and stay physically fit and mentally curious. But when a family tragedy forces him to reenter society – albeit briefly – the results go pretty much as you would expect. These kids know book learning but not about social interaction. Viggo Mortensen gives an excellent performance as the determined dad who is not ready to let any of these kids assimilate into society. 3 cans.
154. The Gathering (1977, Rental) – I’m not a big fan of Christmas movies. I avoid the Hallmark Channel, and, truth be told, I don’t really like “It’s a Wonderful Life.” So why THIS Christmas movie, a 45-year-old TV movie about a family gathering for Christmas? You can start with Ed Asner and Maureen Stapleton as the parents of a large and estranged family. Asner’s Adam Thornton is told by his doctor that he is dying and has only a short time left, so he decides to enlist his wife (they have been separated for years but not divorced) in getting his adult kids back to the family home for Christmas – but without revealing why he so desperately wants to see them. There are old wounds to heal and a son living in Canada to avoid the draft (yes, this IS an old movie) and Dad is stubborn and didn’t make their lives easy. Will they show up in time? Can they function as a family, even without knowing the maudlin truth? Ed Asner gives a stellar performance, and Stapleton is perfect as the wife he abandoned who still loves him but has learned to live without him. If I don’t see any other Christmas movies this year, that’s OK, because this is one I have waited to see again for many, many years. 3½ cans and a lump in the throat.
155.  The Morning Show, Season 2* (2021, Apple TV+) – This program about a fictional morning news program had to deal with the reality of Covid this season. The producers and writers had to find a way to work the pandemic into their storyline for the year and reflect the uncertainty that started in March as the virus was declared a pandemic. The characters here seem realistic, and the panic caused by Covid is portrayed here with confusion – just as in real life. Jennifer Anniston and Reese Witherspoon return as the anchors of “The Morning Show,” although Anniston’s Alex Levy doesn’t have her heart in it anymore after the departure of her former colleague, Mitch (Steve Carrell), who has left the UBS Network in the wake of a Matt Lauer-like scandal. This season brings the arrival of veteran news anchor Laura Peterson (Julianna Margulies), whose character adds some spice; a drugged-out brother for Witherspoon’s Bradley, who is confronting her sexual identity; racial and ethnic issues; and the creepy, scary, look-out, it’s coming to get you Coronavirus. All told, a very busy and not always comfortable 10 episodes, but enough to probably get the series picked up for another season. 4 cans.
156.  Selling Sunset, Season 4* (2021, Netflix) – The blonde bombshell real estate agents for LA’s Oppenheimer group are back and back at it again. Unlike “The Morning Show” reviewed above, this series ignores the pandemic in favor of showing you women stepping out of cars with long legs and gravity-defying high heels – and every single episode seems required to show that shot. There’s a new addition to the group this year and she stirs the drink when it turns out she once dated the same guy that Queen Bee Christine dated. Christine has the fastest recovery from birthing a baby in the history of motherhood and returns to the office to mix it up with her best frenemies. Look, this isn’t Bill Moyers on PBS, I know that, but it is a guilty pleasure. If you like stunning homes with views for miles, along with that “Mean Girls” passive-aggressive attitude, this guilty pleasure is for you. There are 10 episodes, and next season is already being filmed. 4 cans but certainly NOT for everyone!
157.  House of Gucci* (2021, in the theater) – Lady Gaga brings her star power to her role as Patrizia Reggiani, an ambitious young woman who meets the quiet and shy Maurizio Gucci (Adam Driver) heir to the fashion house of the same name and sets her sights on him. Patrizia has a head for business and pushes Maurizio to get more involved in the family concern, which is controlled by his father (Jeremy Irons) and Uncle Aldo (Al Pacino). Aldo’s son (an unrecognizable Jared Leto, wearing a completely questionable wardrobe) is also part of the business, but he’s unreliable and might be involved in questionable practices like his father. The movie transitions into hell hath no fury like a woman scorned once Maurizio begins to flex his fashion muscles and wants to dump Patrizia. I won’t reveal the plot, though you can easily find the details in any review (except mine!). I see an Oscar nomination for Gaga, who, at times looks like a cross between Joan Collins and Rizzo from “Grease.” This movie was a little too long and a little too campy – unintentional or not – for me. 4 cans.
 

November Nothings

I understand the Hallmark Christmas movies debuting at the end of October in the run-up to the holiday, but can someone explain why one of the Hallmark channels aired “A Walton Easter” on October 22? 

I find it odd that the local bagel shop sells quesadillas and downright maddening that its sign says “Quesadilla’s” with an apostrophe.

It is fall foliage season, which means the people in my photography club feel compelled to take a picture of every leaf from every tree in the area and share them with the group. I had so many images of trees in my own collection from years past that I have stopped taking them altogether. Some of the shared pictures are absolutely stunning, but others are nothing more than snapshots. We go through this same process in the spring, where some people take pictures of every blossom on every bush as if we have never seen one before. I get it, you like to take pictures, but unless the picture is really outstanding, spare the share! 

I realize that some of what I buy in the supermarket is limited to what I can reach on the shelf.

I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to chocolate with salt, but I am willing to keep trying!

I think that if the car warranty people call you 50 times and you never pick up and never call them back, your name should just be dropped from the list. Face it, guys, this warranty thing isn’t going to happen. There should be a “mercy” rule like in kids’ sports, where when the game is out of hand, it’s over. I only wish that every time someone said, “This is your LAST call,” they meant it!

I have never sneezed as much as I have this year. There must be something in the air!

You know you’re getting old when you get a bunch of birthday cards in the mail and you open the envelope from United Healthcare first.

I saw a springform pan on sale at ShopRite and thought about buying it, along with a bundt pan, until I remembered that I don’t bake.

Now that ice cream season has ended and soup season has started, I had some store-bought, packaged butternut squash soup for lunch. I have to admit that I had to restrain myself from adding salt to the low-sodium variety. I sure could have used a pinch or two!

One day I went to aqua aerobics, out to lunch, to ShopRite and then to get my hair cut. I was so tired that you would think I just plowed the north forty.

I hate when I am eating a sandwich and I take a bite and the meat starts to slide out the side or bottom of the roll. By the time you are near the end of the half of the sandwich, the bottom portion of the bread has disappeared completely and you have to eat the rest of it upside down!

There is ALWAYS laundry. Maybe because I am at aqua aerobics three times a week and there are towels and bathing suits to wash, but it is more than that. I had to get out all of the sweatshirts and winter pajamas and wash them. And then I had to gather my Rutgers gear and get those basketball shirts freshened up for the new season. The throw blankets didn’t smell quite right to put on the couch after being cooped up in my closet all summer, so they went into the wash. It seems like last year’s quarantine – when I was wearing the same thing for three days running – required a lot less laundry!

Speaking of laundry, as I was doing a lousy job folding my allegedly permanent-press sheets, I was thinking about how my mother would take an old Coke bottle, fill it with water, put a sprinkler top on it and wet the pillowcases (along with my father’s shirts), roll them up and put them in the refrigerator. I think we had more laundry than food in the fridge sometimes! When she had enough of a load, she would take everything out and iron it. Wow, times have changed. Not only don’t I have laundry in the refrigerator, but can you even buy Coke in a glass bottle?

Do you sleep on the left side, the right side, or in the middle of the bed? My answer to this question would be YES (all three).

You know how in the movie when a couple has spent the night together, the first one up takes the blanket or sheet off the bed and modestly wraps him/herself in it? That couldn’t happen here. I make the bed so tightly that you would be lucky to get into it, no less out of it!

My father always told us that you should find something positive to say about a person. So, if you can think of nothing else positive to say about me, please note that I can always get an injection or have blood drawn without even flinching. Pretty commendable, right?

I have a stash of little metal things that look like they fell off a lamp, and keys to God-knows-what and zillions of buttons that came with clothes I probably no longer own – all things that for some reason I am afraid to throw out. My collection of chargers alone is substantial, and do I know what each one is for? An old phone that no longer works – in the house or in the car? Yet I can’t part with these things. Just in case, you know…

I always wondered how you were supposed to know whether you are in the last three cars of the train that don’t “platform,” meaning you have to run like hell to move up to where you can get off when the train pulls into your station. Usually, you’re running to get on the train, and unless you know there are plenty of cars in front or behind where you hopped on, who knows whether your car is going to make it so you can get off before you have to do the 100-yard dash?

Last month I ranted about receiving multiple reminders about my dental appointment. That’s as bad as receiving an email from your doctor that informs you that you have a message in your chart, which means you have to establish an account with the practice to access that information. And then it turns out that the message is just a thank you for showing up! In that case, I’d prefer just an email, a text or a voice mail, because setting up the account means another username and password I have to remember. Why is everything so complicated?

At some point soon, I am going to need a fancy dress – and I don’t know where to go to shop for one. The Lord & Taylor at my local mall had the nerve to shutter its doors during the pandemic. I felt like we broke up and I never got to say goodbye. They got custody of all the nice clothes! I have been to the mall only once or twice since the beginning of the pandemic, but what I strange feeling it will be not to see L&T there. I guess Macy’s wins by default.

When I was growing up, there were two kinds of apples to eat – Macintosh and Delicious. Although people then used Granny Smith apples for baking, they weren’t found in my house since we were NOT the house of pies. Now there are so many varieties that it takes as long to pick out apples as it does to select a pair of shoes. Maybe I should have an apple tasting party to sample the many varieties!

I'm a football fan but I am also a creature of habit. When I turn on the TV on Sunday morning at 9, I want to see Jane Pauley and "CBS Sunday Morning," not Trevor Lawrence in London with the Jaguars. (That sounds like "Colonel Mustard in the Conservatory with the lead pipe," doesn't it?)

Here’s the thing about microwave popcorn: If you keep it in the microwave for just a few seconds too long, it will burn and stink up your kitchen for weeks to come. But if you take it out too soon, you are left with too many unpopped kernels, which seems wasteful. I rarely make popcorn, but, when I do, I try to find a happy medium for popping time.

I found a foolproof method for making the mums in front of my house always look good: When they die, I throw them out and buy new ones. At a price of three pots for $15, it costs less than eating lunch out and they always look good. Of course, watering them instead of waiting for the anticipated rain that never seems to come when you need it would also do the trick. The replacements looked great yesterday, but they must have looked especially attractive to the local deer, because this morning all of the blooms were GONE! And now, so are the mums.

Every single piece of mail delivered Saturday went immediately into the recycling pile – after a brief detour so I could block out my name and address with my nifty little CONFIDENTIAL stamp! Most of my bills are sent electronically and I pay them online, so the mail that comes to the house generally consists of advertisements and pleas for fundraising campaigns. This seems like such a waste of time, paper and ink to me.

You know you have been friends for a long time (in this case, 53 years) when the BFF sends you a beautiful birthday card with a lovely note and tucked inside is an article on the accuracy of expiration dates on food, a subject on which we have divergent views. OK, I get it – “sell by” doesn’t mean it isn’t still good, and “use by” means you can freeze it. So, this is what friendship has come to, discussions of the safety of food. I consider myself lucky to have a friend who cares that much about me that she doesn’t want to see my waste my money by tossing out food that is still good. You really are the BEST, Jo.

October 2021 Movies & More

October wasn't a great month for movies & more for me, but here are 11 things to watch and one to avoid at all costs. Numbering picks up from previous months and an asterisk indicates that I haven't seen the show previously. Everything is rated from 0-5 cans (for the first time), with 5 being the top. 

131.  The Many Saints of Newark* (2021, HBO Max) – So, this is how it all began. Teenaged Tony Soprano (admirably played by Michael Gandolfini, son of the late James Gandolfini who originated the role) is a lazy punk with a lousy life and an uncle, Dickie Moltasanti (Alessandro Nivola), whom he thinks is the greatest, coolest guy. This prequel to the classic HBO series “The Sopranos” focuses on Dickie, a Mob guy surrounded by characters we all recognize from the show (assuming you watched the series). But Dickie was only referred to in the original series, and the Moltisanti name is familiar because of Dickie’s son Christopher, who was close with Tony Soprano. The action here takes place beginning in the 1960s, with plenty of Mob gunplay and beatings and a depiction of the 1967 riots in Newark that drove people to the suburbs – including the Soprano family. I can’t get into much of the plot without spoiling it, but I couldn’t take my eyes off the new actors playing such familiar characters as Pauly Walnuts, Silvio, Big Pussy and the family, as well as with Tony’s miserable mother Livia (Vera Farmiga) and his Uncle Junior (Corey Stoll). This prequel establishes much of what we saw in the series and sets up nicely for a sequel to the prequel. Leslie Odom Jr. of “Hamilton” fame has an important role as a man who collects the numbers money from Dickie and wants to go out on his own. If you liked the series and Mob movies like “Goodfellas,” this movie is for you. And maybe if you have never seen “The Sopranos,” you’ll find that this movie stands on its own merit. 4 cans. I’m afraid to give fewer cans.
132.  The Starling* (2021, Netflix) – Quick plot summary: Woman in a dead-end job suffers tragedy, visits her husband in a mental hospital, tries to garden and is stalked by a deranged starling. Melissa McCarthy brings considerable pathos and a bit of humor to her part as the beleaguered wife of Chris O’Dowd, who is detached and miserable as he carries on his life in the face of tragedy while treated by cliched doctors. Melissa starts seeing a veterinarian (Kevin Kline) who is a former therapist, mostly for therapy but also for help with the starling who keeps attacking her in her garden. This movie tugs on your heartstrings even when it seems the bird will win. 3½ cans.
133.  Diana, the Musical* (2021, Netflix) – Take everything you already know about the late Princess Diana, throw in forgettable music and limited choreography and you have this underwhelming theatrical event, originally scheduled to open on Broadway last year but delayed by the pandemic until November, 2021. In the interim, the same geniuses who devised this travesty decided to record it in a theater so we could all see it at home – and thanks for letting us realize that we need to avoid the stage version. The performers are merely adequate, even though they haven't been given challenging material, and the stage in the theater looks as small as one in a high school auditorium. I won’t rehash the plot, but it doesn’t end well for the once sweet and innocent 19-year-old who thought she was marrying Prince Charming. The only part of this production worth mentioning is how they managed to change Diana’s wardrobe right on stage, in front of our eyes the audience without being able to figure out how it was done (and I even replayed parts!). For the most part, this is a cringeworthy and cruel violation of poor Diana, who cannot even rest in peace. If this lasts a week on Broadway, I’ll be shocked. I’ll give it a noteworthy 0 cans, a first among thousands of my reviews.
134.  Ted Lasso, Season 2* (2021, Apple TV+) – Treat yourself to a trial or short-term subscription to Apple TV+ just to watch season 2 of last year’s big hit. Ted is still a fish out of water, an American, midwestern/Southern boy coaching foreign football (soccer to us) in England, but he has assimilated nicely and the formerly hapless team is winning. This season sees owner Rebecca (Waddington) in a larger role, while the others in the supporting cast do their best work. Ted proves human, as he misses his family, has a major panic attack and looks to new team sports psychologist Sharon to help. The dialog is crisp and chock full of clever cultural references. The progression of the story not only builds on season one but beautifully sets up season three. If only we wouldn’t have to wait so long to savor the new season, because this one is as sweet as Ted’s buttery biscuits. Kudos to Jason Sudeikis, the actor who also serves as a writer-producer on the show, and to writer-actor Brett Goldstein for his Emmy-winning role as irascible Roy Kent . 4 cans.
135.  Citizen Hearst* (2021, The American Experience, PBS) – The classic movie “Citizen Kane” may well have been the fictionalized story of William Randolph Hearst, though the real man loved showgirls much more than a sled named “Rosebud.” This two-party documentary is an exhaustive look at the man who took his father’s mining fortune and used it to build a publishing empire. He started with a single newspaper and expanded to papers around the US, adding magazines and broadcasting along the way. He was a blustery demagogue, always eager to use his purchased platform to promote his beliefs, which proved contradictory over time. He holed up in the Hearst Castle in San Simeon, pointedly showing off his wealth and power. This is a story of power and fortune that reinforces my belief that no one should have THAT much of either. I would have liked this documentary more if it were half as long.  3½ cans.
136.  News of the World* (2020, HBO) – Tom Hanks has been a pilot, an astronaut, an FBI guy, Forrest Gump and a castaway. Now he is convincing (isn’t he always?) in a Western as an aging Civil War veteran who goes town-to-town reading newspapers to the townfolk who want to know the almost latest news. And he gets paid 10 cents a head for doing it! In his travels he encounters a young girl who has lost her birth family and the Native Americans who took her as a child. He agrees to get her back to her family but to do so the duo must brave weather and nefarious characters on their journey. They bond despite her inability to speak English. This is a gritty tale and Hanks’ Captain Kidd is tough enough to endure the hardships without being a macho stereotype. There’s not much to enjoy in this movie but plenty to admire, including the performance of Helena Zengel as a tough but trusting young girl. And when was the last time I watched a Western? 3½ cans.
137.  The Ice Road* (2021, Netflix) – Did you know that trucks travel over frozen bodies of water in the coldest climates on what are called “ice roads?” Neither did I. But these roads become critical when there is a mine collapse in Manitoba and getting equipment to the site in time to save the trapped miners requires a truck convoy carrying cargo too heavy to airlift. Liam Neeson is one of the truckers racing against time and the distinct possibility of the ice cracking under the heavy vehicles to deliver the equipment to get the miners out. Little does he know that his mission has been sabotaged by the company that hired him and the others for reasons too convoluted to share. There is plenty, and I mean, plenty of action, with crashing bridges and bad guys hanging on to the truck doors trying to get inside, dynamite and other explosions. As action-adventure movies go, this fits into the genre and offers at least a new location for the action to take place, but it doesn’t do much to distinguish itself from other, similar films.  3 cans.
138.  The Guilty* (2021, Netflix) – This movie is Jake Gyllenhaal, Jake Gyllenhaal, Jake Gyllenhaal, so if you like Jake Gyllenhaal, this movie is for you. Here he is Joe, a police detective with something hanging over his head who has been assigned to duty as an emergency 911 operator. He catches a call from a woman who seems to have been abducted and scrambles to get information from her that he can relay to the highway patrol and figure out what has happened. It is a harrowing day for well-meaning but intense Joe, as he struggles to keep the caller on the phone and dispatch help for her and her children. The suspense is continuously amped up as Joe tries to untangle the story while dealing with family issues of his own. This movie kept me on the edge of my seat. 3½ cans.
139.  Aerial America* (2021, Smithsonian Channel) – I have never reviewed a series before seeing the entire thing (and there are over 50 episodes in this series), but since I know that many of you appreciate recommendations of what to watch, I am happy to include this series here after seeing just a handful of episodes. Whether the episode focuses on an entire state, a single city or a region, each hour is filled with fantastic aerial footage that shows roads and bridges and architecture and parks and the amazing sites of each place featured. Throw in an excellent narration and an informative history lesson (New England was a favorite episode for me) that covers how we got to this point in any place, and you have a program that would be great in an educational environment as well as compelling to watch from the couch. And yes, if you watch the New Jersey episode, you will understand why we really are called the Garden State. I truly stumbled on this series while looking for something quiet to watch that might make me fall asleep, and while this accomplished that goal, I have gone back to watch anything I might have missed. If you are looking for something informative and easy on the eyes, check this out! 4 cans.
140.  Breaking Point: Mardy Fish* (2021, Netflix) – Unless you are a real tennis fan, you have probably never heard of American tennis player Mardy Fish. Mardy started on the pro circuit just after the reign of Pete Sampras and Jim Courier ended and right before the trio of Roger Federer, Rafael Nadal and Novak Djokovic began dominating the sport. Fish and his good friend and training buddy Andy Roddick were newcomers at the same time, but Roddick was clearly the better player, more physically gifted and competitive than Fish. But while Fish was winning matches on the court, off the court he was succumbing to anxiety and mental health issues that he eventually had to address. Being told that you can never be weak and that you must always win would take a toll on almost anyone. Today the subject of mental health among athletes is much more common and accepted. But when Fish had his version of Simone Biles’ “twisties,” discussing mental health was just not done. This documentary provides a realistic look at the life of the elite athlete, what they have to sacrifice to get to the top and how the pressure makes it hard to sustain success. 3½ cans.
141. Good Night and Good Luck (2005, PBS) – The only thing worse than a bully is a bully with a pulpit. Welcome to the McCarthy Era, the period in the 1950s when Wisconsin Senator Joseph McCarthy ruined the lives and reputations of many Americans by accusing them of having ties to the Communist Party. In hearings before the House Un-American Activities Committee, McCarthy didn’t hesitate to fling accusations about people called to testify without presenting evidence or giving them access to information on why they were being accused. The White Knights in this drama – cleverly directed in black & white by George Clooney, who also stars as CBS News chief Fred Friendly – were the broadcasters of CBS News, led by the venerable Edward R. Murrow (David Strathairn in an excellent portrayal).  Their mission was to demonstrate the unfairness of McCarthy’s diatribes and methods. I probably should have revisited this movie last year, when the bully pulpit was put to extended use. Clooney expertly weaves real footage from the hearings into the movie, where the CBS execs are ensconced in smoke-filled rooms, fighting for truth, justice and the American way – or so it seemed. 4 cans.
142.  Joe Bell* (2021, Prime Video rental) – Joe Bell (a scruffy Marck Wahlberg) is a blue-collar guy with a wife and two sons. He truly loves them, but he is uncomfortable knowing that his elder son, a teenager, is being bullied at school because he is gay. When people start taunting his son, a cheerleader, at a football game, he doesn’t retaliate or respond. He simply leaves the game. When the boy is sexually assaulted and the school refuses to take action, there are dire consequences for the young man, prompting Joe to start a cross-country walk as his personal anti-bullying campaign. But even while doing that he doesn’t know how to deal with the adults who question him. You know he loves his son, but showing his love and support seems impossible for Joe. This is a morose movie but realistic in depicting one man who doesn’t know how to handle his own feelings. Based on a true story. 3 cans.

October Offerings

Let’s face it, nobody wants to pay for shipping.

The post office has declared that the price of postage will be going up and the service will be slowing down. That’s like saying, “the food is terrible and the portions are so small.”

Remember when we used to have to lick stamps? What a pleasure it was when they became self-stick! Now that we are in the throes of a pandemic, wouldn’t it be a good idea if greeting cards came with self-stick envelopes? My bill paying envelopes are self-stick, but do I really want to put my tongue on a greeting card envelope? Luckily, the Post Office is so slow these days that any germs I put on the envelope will have died a slow and torturous death by the time the card reaches its recipient, but still…

The Dollar Store announced that it will start selling things for more than a dollar. I was always amazed at how much stuff they sold for just a dollar – things like ceramic bowls, glass vases, decent quality plastic containers – and now we will have to see whether the store will begin carrying higher-priced merchandise like clothing or will simply raise their prices on existing merchandise. And will they change their name to something like “Used to Be the Dollar Store?”

It seems to me that if you use the word “nowadays” or the phrase “back in the day,” you have thrown in the towel and acknowledged that you are OLD.

I guess you have to be “of a certain age” to remember when hair salons were called “beauty parlors” and the hair stylists were “beauticians.” Personally, I always felt those terms overpromised the results.

Speaking of being old, I hit the 70-year-old milestone last October, and I was just getting adjusted to it when it occurred to me that in two weeks I will be 71. I’m not sure I’m quite ready for that!

My mind might not be the steel trap it once was (and when was that, you ask?), but I really don’t think I require two emails, two text messages and a voice mail to remind me to show up for my teeth cleaning! And then please don’t send me a survey about my visit that arrives by the time I get home!

Fall officially starts when I wash the sweatshirts. I have already done four loads.

The only positive thing about the Yankees’ failure to advance in post-season play is that I won’t have to stay up until all hours to watch the games. If the Yankees aren’t in it, I’m out!

I can’t take the pressure of walking into the nail salon and trying to pick a color. It can’t be too dark, too light, too pink or too orange and it can’t have any kind of sparkle. It can’t be blue, green or yellow and I don’t want a French manicure (I wonder if all manicures in France are considered French manicures). That leaves 812 shades of red and 682 of beige. Last time I picked a color that looked great. By the time I got home I was sure it was too dark!

Your fingers are like your tongue in that when you try to relax either because you are instructed to do so by the nail technician or the dentist, you can’t. I never think about how tense my fingers are or where my tongue is until someone tells me to do – or to not do – something with either.

If there is ever any kind of “World Championship of Slouching,” look for me among the contestants. I’ll be on top of the leaderboard, contending for the title.

There are droves of people in my “active adult” community who are really active. You find them playing pickleball or walking all around the complex day and night. What cracks me up is that many of the women carry cross-body handbags (a contradiction in terms for sure). Are they carrying wallets and credit cards? Because there’s no place to shop in this community. Trust me, if there were, I would be shopping!

Seriously, it is easier to select a new Pope than a permanent host of “Jeopardy.” I’m waiting for those white puffs of smoke to rise from the Alex Trebek stage where the show is filmed. I guess Alex really did have all of the answers. I was beginning to believe that contestant Matt Amodio would outlast all of the guest hosts and the semi-permanent ones, but his reign as champion ended after 39 days. He won more than a million and a half dollars and surpassed James Holzhauer to become the second winningest player of all time, trailing only Ken Jennings in the total number of games won. Maybe HE can be the next host!

I miss the original five flavor rolls of LifeSavers. The cherry, lemon, lime, orange and pineapple of my youth were relaunched in 2003 with my two favorite flavors – lime and lemon – replaced by watermelon and raspberry. When I see green, I think lime, not watermelon. I would even let other people take the cherry if I could have the lime. They should have left this venerable candy alone!

My friend who works for Staples reports that a person called the store to ask whether Staples sold pens. I guess the customer thought Staples could build an entire business around the sale of staples. Considering that I buy staples about every dozen years or so, they sure couldn’t stay in business because of me. The same friend recounts that she was perched on the top of one of those gigantic ladders when a customer asked her (in all seriousness): “Do you work here?” She wanted to say, “No, I just like climbing up ladders,” but she refrained.

Heard at aqua aerobics: “Where is so-and-so today?” Answer: “She had a funeral.” Comment: “Oh, did someone die?” Cue the Staples customers.

I don’t get the concept of bittersweet. Shouldn’t it be one or the other?

Have you noticed that those bags of salad we buy because we are too lazy to cut up all of the lettuce and veggies are getting smaller? What used to be enough to feed a family is now barely enough for three decent salads.

I went to bed before 10 the other night but woke up at 3 AM and could not get back to sleep. I had Alexa play me spa music, meditation music (I might have been better off with MEDICATION music) – nothing worked. So, I finally succumbed to the lure of the TV, tuning into the Smithsonian Channel in hopes of finding something very low-key and boring that would lull me back to sleep. Instead, I now know enough tell you the complete story of how milk is processed and how KitKats are made in England.

You get up, shower well, get dressed and go to the doctor’s office where they make you wait to get in and then make you strip down and put on that flimsy paper gown that barely covers up your most private areas and rips when you hop up on the examination table, where you wait some more. That’s the definition of humiliation.

I got my third Covid vaccination a week ago, so that means I have just one more week to go before I am completely, totally vaccinated. Does this mean that I will go to lots of indoor parties and shed my mask? Start singing in a choir (you all had better hope not)? Hardly, but I like my odds of survival more now than a year ago. It means I can go to basketball games – for the first time in two years – and feel safer. Since Moderna hasn’t been approved as a booster, I guess what I received was a third dose, or a half-dose, but I am glad to get whatever they gave me. My doctor said that my most recent blood worked showed that I still had antibodies from my first two shots, so I figure that we just topped off the tank! I had a slightly sore arm but no other reaction, unlike the chills and body aches I had with the second shot. So, mission accomplished – for now. If the protocol calls for a shot every year, sign me up! And if you haven't yet gotten your vaccination, I hope you will do it soon. I like your odds better with the shot!

Tina's September 2021 Movies & More

This month's list features many "& more" programs amid a bunch of movies that I had not seen before. Numbering picks up from previous months and new programs are indicated by an asterisk. The rating scale is 1-5 cans of tuna, with 5 being the top rating.

119.  911/One Day in America* (2021, National Geographic Channel, Hulu) – This 6-part documentary is a sobering recount of the events of that fateful day, now 20 years in our past. There are moments of futility, wrenching sadness and times that uplift the human spirit. This is not the kind of program you can enjoy, but it is one that we all should see to remember what happened that day and to appreciate the heroics of the firefighters, police, rescue personnel, medical staff and ordinary citizens who risked or lost their lives trying to save others. 4 cans.
120.  9/11 (2015, CNN) – Two French brothers who were shooting a documentary about a young firefighter had their cameras rolling when the first plane hit the World Trade Center and kept rolling through the second plane strike, the collapse of both of the Twin Towers and even into the following day, as the heroic firefighters dug through rubble looking for survivors. The engine company battalion chief here lost his brother, but most of the firefighters in the film made it out alive. Much of the footage is used in the movie listed above. 4 cans and a giant lump in the throat.
121.  Click Bait* (2021, Netflix) – Don’t even start this 8-part series unless you have time to sit down and watch the whole thing, because you will be hooked immediately. The story centers on Nick Brewer (Adrian Grenier), a man who is kidnapped and recorded by his captors holding up signs claiming he abused and killed women. The video goes viral, with the warning that once it gets 5,000 views he will be killed. Now it is a race against time to try to track him down, with police and amateur sleuths who are experts in social media getting involved. There are plenty of suspects, red herrings and skeletons in the closets of many people on the case. The action rarely lets up. Good cast full of actors new to me, with Zoe Kazan as Nick’s sister Pia the best of the bunch. 4 cans.
122.  Titletown High School* (2021, Netflix) – Welcome to “Friday Night Lights” in the real town of Valdosta, Georgia, where the legendary high school state champs have seen their program slide. Controversial Coach Rush Probst has been brought in to turn around the once mighty program, and he is used to doing things his way. Too much of this 8-part series focuses on teenage relationship drama (is cute Morgan too much of a distraction for young quarterback Amari? Does anyone really care whether seldom used defender Grayson wants to be with Zoey or Lenley?) and there is much less actual coaching and more general exhortations to the team about their abilities. Six parts would have been better at limiting the less important stuff. High school football, whether it is in Alabama (see Probst’s last series, “Two-A-Days” from his time at Alabama’s Hoover High) or Georgia or Texas (home of FNL) is depicted as being the most important thing in the lives of all concerned, with little regard for the future of the players (the series rarely mentions college opportunities for the players until the very end). The coaching practices, the raising of money, recruiting players, the ever-present boosters, all seem unseemly – because they are – even though it is reality. If you watched “Last Chance U” or “QB1,” this series is for you. 3½ cans.
123.  Boatlift* (YouTube) – On the morning of the 20th anniversary of 9/11, I was glued to the TV, watching live coverage and listening to the reading of the names of the nearly 3,000 people who died in this horrific tragedy. But this very short (12 minutes) film gave me an actual lift. It is the account of how boats in the New Yok area came to the rescue of the people who made their way to lower Manhattan to get out of the city when the buildings fell. There were party boats, ferryboats and just about anything that floated that converged to rescue the people trapped on the Island. These were people who did their part in the tragedy to help strangers and whose role in rescuing a half a million people was a story I hadn’t known, and one worth seeing. 4 cans.
124.  Once Upon a Time in Queens* (2021, ESPN) – This four-part documentary about the 1986 World Champion New York Mets is part of the ESPN “30 for 30” franchise. The lovable losers who captured the hearts of New York with their improbable 1969 World Series win had fallen on hard times in the years between then and the mid-1980s, until General Manager Frank Cashen brought in his old Orioles manager, Davey Johnson, to take the reins of a club that was suddenly flush with talent. Homegrown players Darryl Strawberry and Dwight Gooden were baseball phenoms and key trades brought professional hitters and leaders like Keith Hernandez, Gary Carter and Ray Knight to the clubhouse. No doubt this crew was ready to excel – as long as some nasty habits didn’t get in the way. According to this series, most of the team partied as hard as they played, drinking and using drugs on airplanes, frequenting nightclubs and chasing women. Davey Johnson as the manager was inclined to leave them along as long they showed up at the ballpark and played hard. But the early success, riches and pressures faced by young Gooden and Strawberry proved too much for them, and they both developed major league drug problems that shortened and interrupted what might have been Hall of Fame careers. The movie doesn’t shy away from these serious issues, but it also celebrates the team’s growth and success as they put it all together in 1986, dumping Houston and thwarting the Boston Red Sox to capture the World Series. It was fun taking a stroll down memory lane as the Mets captured the crown and the heart and soul of New York (minus the Yankee fans, of course). 4 cans.
125.  Guilt* (2021, Masterpiece Theater, PBS) – Two brothers are returning from a party when their car strikes an old man in the road, killing him. Do they call the police? Do they try to get help? No, they carry him inside his house, put him in a chair and, once they discover that he was dying of cancer, they hit the road. Sure enough, his dead body is found and the cause of death is attributed to his cancer. But then someone notices paint chips on his pants and wounds on his legs, and his American niece turns up and the nosy neighbor tries to blackmail people and there is footage from a neighbor’s security camera and the brothers keep getting sucked into the quicksand that is this case. There is black humor amid the death, beatings, infidelities, betrayals and romance. This 4-part series leaves the door open for a possible sequel, and I’ll probably watch that one, too, because Guilt is a trip. 3½ cans.
126.  The Courier* (2020, Prime Video) – Greville Wynne (Benedict Cumberbatch) is a not-so-smart businessman who gets drafted to aid the MIG and CIA in delivering documents from the Soviet Union to the British and Americans in advance of the Cuban Missile Crisis of 1962. This spy movie is based on a true story, where the Brit and his Russian contact Alex (Merab Ninidze) become friends as Wynne makes his frequent trips to the USSR to gather documents and information. He is actually a businessman, and not a very good one, and he knows nothing about what he is conveying. If you’re looking for a suspense movie about spies, I’d recommend “Bridge of Spies” with Tom Hanks over this one, which dragged a bit. 3 cans.
127.  Muhammad Ali* (2021, PBS) – Documentarian Ken Burns does a deep dive (eight hours) into the life of boxer Muhammad Ali, born Cassius Clay. Ali transcended his sport, becoming the most famous person of the century before dying in 2016 at the age of 74. Burns offers a detailed portrait that examines the youthful, brash Ali, how he got into boxing, his triumphs and his falls. And much of the story focuses on Ali’s embracing Islam as his religion, his infidelities and his preparation (or lack of at times) for his fights. Ali was a character that no one had ever seen – colorful, braggadocios and self-confident. As in many stories of athletes, there is a rise, success, and then a fall, as Ali recaptures the heavyweight championship after being banned from the sport because of his refusal to serve in the military on religious grounds. His three bouts with Joe Frazier, his fights with George Foreman (the “rope-a-dope” fight), Ken Norton and former sparring partner Larry Holmes are covered and show his deterioration as a fighter as well as his failing health. It is poignant and cruel to watch him endure tremendous punishment as he got older. His eventual diagnosis with Parkinsons, his shuffling gait and his limited speech are sad to witness from the man who could “float like a butterfly and sting like a bee.” He was bigger than life and his decline so sad to witness. He truly was “The Greatest.” 4 cans.
128.  The Eyes of Tammy Faye* (2021, Movie theater) – Let’s start with the fact that the heavily made-up eyes of Tammy Faye (an unrecognizable Jessica Chastain) don’t blink. Ever. Maybe she was afraid that those false eyelashes and the ton of mascara would weigh down her lids to the point where she couldn’t open them again. And then there’s that white stripe under the permanent, tattooed brows, which looked like it was applied with White Out. By the end of this movie, Tammy’s features were so exaggerated and distorted that for a minute I thought I was watching Dustin Hoffman in “Tootsie.” However, none of that make-up or the wigs or the outfits can take away from the story of Tammy Faye and her holier-than-thou husband Jim Baker (Andrew Garfield), TV evangelists whose preaching and pleading for good Christians to send money to their ministry kept them on the air and living in opulence for years. They were doing the work of God, who they proclaimed loved them – and you, too, as long as you sent in money. But it didn’t start that way. Both Jim and Tammy Faye were true believers who got caught up in money and power and all that it corrupts, including infidelity and really sketchy financial records that resulted in Jim’s going to jail. Chastain plays Tammy as a petite and perky woman trying desperately to please her flock and her husband. I was reminded by Chastain’s dead-on Tammy of Renee Zellweger’s transformation into Judy Garland. Expect her name to be called when they read off the list of nominees for this year’s Best Actress Oscar. Garfield also deserves kudos for his portrayal of the smarmy con man preacher, full of wide-eyed innocence and greed. You truly can’t make this stuff up. I have never watched their PTL show, but I’m glad I saw the movie. 4 cans.
129.  Promising Young Woman* (2020, HBO) – Whoa! I can promise you that if you see this suspenseful revenge drama, you will be blown away by Carey Mulligan as lead character Cassie. Cassie is out to avenge the death of her friend Nina when both were promising young med students, before a traumatizing event resulted in both of them dropping out. I can’t say too much about the plot without spoiling the movie, so I’ll just say that Mulligan plays the character to the hilt. This is a timely story, full of suspense and a reflection on the times we live in now.  4 cans.
130.  LuLaRich* (2021, Amazon Prime Video) – Before I started this 4-part Amazon docuseries, the only things I knew about the women’s clothing company LuLaRoe were hearing news stories on major issues with product quality of their big selling leggings. That was just the beginning. The company, started by DeAnne and her husband Mark Stidham, began when she started selling a line of colorful maxi skirts. Sales soared, so she decided to expand the business by bringing in new people to sell. Thus was born a multi-level marketing business, where each person gets rewarded not only for selling products but for bringing in more people to do the same thing. If you’re thinking “pyramid scheme,” so was I. The enthusiastic founders touted the company as a way for women to be successful while still caring for their families and supporting their spouses. What started as a business grew exponentially and began taking on cult-like aspects. The company promised 100% refunds for defective merchandise and then reneged. They paid out handsome bonuses to the higher level “mentors” and then changed the process. The documentary features the founders in depositions for a lawsuit in Washington where DeAnne sounds as if she knew little about the operations of the company she founded. There are plenty of promises made and broken here. If you like a juicy business story, like “The Smartest Guys in The Room” (the story of Enron), you’ll appreciate this in-depth look at the business of pushing leggings. 3½ pairs.

See You In September

Every now and then I hear myself shouting out an answer on “Jeopardy” and wondering how I knew it. These days, I’m shouting at the TV during "Jeopardy" for entirely different reasons.

I cleaned my humidifier this morning with vinegar and now my whole bathroom smells like salad dressing.

You know what is annoying? When I am yawning like crazy and I STILL can’t fall asleep. 

I buy the “executive turkey” at the deli counter because, well, you know, I used to be one. I’ll let you decide whether that means I used to be an executive or a turkey.

For someone who hasn’t been in school in nearly 50 years and who has no children or grandchildren, why am I still so tempted to buy school supplies when the displays go up? I’m not sure why I continue to have this fascination. A neighbor of mine was collecting school supplies for local kids, so I was able to shop for pens, pencils, markers, etc., and satisfy my craving for a good cause!

When I had acne as a teenager, doctors and the general consensus at the time said that I would outgrow it. I’m 70 now and wondering how old I have to be to outgrow it. Will I outlive it? 

As I ate a piece of French toast recently, I wondered whether someone in France was eating a piece of good old plain toast and condemning Americans for their poor taste in food.

It disappoints me that there is a warning label on the package of Tide Pods that tells people not to eat them. What makes us think that anyone stupid enough to eat them would be smart enough to read and heed the warning? And if this warning is for children, the ones who might eat the pods can’t read anyway.

I have to clean out my freezer (I’ll spare you the long and boring story) so eating a single-sized pizza and cracking open a box of coveted Girl Scout Thin Mints was really only to accomplish that goal. But I also realized that if I simply downsize my ridiculously large collection of ice packs, I can probably double my usable food storage space. I have more ice packs on hand than a physical therapy place!

In any case, I could use a professional organizer to study my refrigerator and my dishwasher and show me how to use the space more efficiently. The irony is that I don’t have much food around and I hardly ever use the dishwasher, though my BFF tells me all the time that I should!

My plan in August was to go peach picking with a friend, but the peach orchard was closed. So instead, we went to the farmers market where the orchard sells their peaches and I picked up two quarts. I guess you could say I picked them myself, but in reality, they were already in a bag. No bending and gathering the peaches this way, which was fine with me!

I’m such a sucker for gadgets. I found a sandwich maker branded “Nostalgia” on display for only $8.96, and I just HAD to buy it. It makes just one sandwich at a time (which is fine), and claims to be great with pre-fab cinnamon rolls, but so far I have only used it once, for a tuna melt. Listen, for $9 bucks, I can hardly BUY a sandwich, so this gizmo is really a bargain. I have it neatly stored next to the juicer I bought last year, alongside my food sealer. No comment!

Why are there so many insurance commercials? There’s my favorite – Flo from Progressive – along with the ubiquitous Geico gecko (and a thousand other Geico iterations), the emu from Liberty Mutual, the crew of Jake and the athletes who hawk State Farm, the not-just-for-farmers Farmers Insurance, USAA for military families (but not associated with the actual military), All-State and many more who regularly appear on TV to remind us to have insurance. I don’t use any of these companies. I’m sticking with low-key New Jersey Manufacturers, which only recently started to advertise and touts the fact that they don’t have a mascot or a jingle representing their brand. And they answer the phone every time I have a question or a problem. I don’t need a gecko with a British accent to sell me insurance!

I’m FINALLY back at aqua aerobics after a two-year break because of my shoulder injury (torn rotator cuff) and subsequent surgery and physical therapy as well as COVID. Not much has changed, except people who are not vaccinated must wear masks to the poolside. The pool water is still too cold so it takes me forever to get really wet. The paper towel holder in the bathroom – the kind you are supposed to run your hands over to get a towel dispensed – still randomly spits out a towel even if no one is in the vicinity. And the soap in the shower still smells like Stella D’Oro Breakfast Treats. It’s great to be back!

Speaking of the pool, I am taking aqua Zumba once a week and I really enjoy it, which only proves you don’t have to be good at something to have fun doing it. Sometimes I want to tell the instructor that the reason I couldn’t do a particular step is because the water got in my way. Let’s just say that it is a good thing this is a “no-cut” team, or I would have to find something else to do on Fridays!

My washing machine has a dozen different settings (sheets and towels, cold and hot, delicates, speed wash, etc.) for washing and several more for rinsing and spinning. I use two. What about you?

I have heard from so many people during the pandemic, people who reached out to see if I was safe, how I was managing through the lockdown and whether I had everything I needed. But who kept in touch best? Kohl’s. Nearly every day – or at least several times a week – they would send me emails encouraging me to shop, enticing me with special sales and offers, promising to bring whatever I bought right to my door. It’s nice to know they care, right? Now send me that Kohl’s cash!

As a huge sports fan, I always watch the US Open Tennis Tournament. Years ago, I attended the event regularly, back when it was held at Flushing Meadows and then when the USTA built the Billie Jean King Tennis Center on the site of the 1964 New York World’s Fair. This year I watched in awe as two young women, aged 18 & 19 respectively, both unranked, battled it out for the championship. Anna Raducanu of Great Britain beat Leylah Fernandez of Canada in straight sets. The next day Anna got a congratulatory message from Queen Elizabeth herself – signed “Elizabeth R.” Wow! I look forward to a great rivalry between these two talented young ladies. I hope they continue to grow and find joy in the sport without overextending themselves with endorsement deals and fashion shoots and other draining obligations. 

NY Governor Andrew Cuomo: From Hero to Zero. One year he is must-see TV with his Covid briefings. The next year the attorney general of NY finds in an investigation that he sexually harassed multiple, credible women and he finally resigns from office. I have no sympathy for his fall from grace. His wounds were self-inflicted. Let this be a lesson to all men: Your teasing and touching of women is unwanted and wrong. Why don’t you get that? Cuomo has daughters in their 20s. How would he react if they were treated the same way he treated other women?

Please get vaccinated. I did it for you.

I watched so much of the coverage of the 20th anniversary of 9/11, including several documentaries, and for some reason, this occasion rattled me more this year than ever. I woke up, watched, cried, threw up, watched some more, cried some more and I can’t believe it has been 20 years since we lost nearly 3000 poor souls in those acts of terrorism. Like everyone else, I remember that day clearly, what I was doing and how heartsick I felt for the families who lost loved ones. I still marvel at the thought of the police and firefighters who ran INTO the buildings to try to save people who were trapped. And I especially appreciate the outpouring of kindness people showed to each other – whether they were friends or strangers – on that fateful day and the days thereafter. I wish we would all put aside our personal, political beliefs and unify for the greater good.

Tina's August 2021 Movies & More

We can add another 15 movies, etc., to the 2021 list, including a few good ones and a few that are better left forgotten. Numbering picks up from previous months and programs marked with an asterisk* are ones I had not seen previously. Everything is rated on a scale of one to five cans of tuna, and more is better!

104.  Poms* (2019, Netflix) – When I think of Diane Keaton, I think of “Annie Hall,” or “As Good As It Gets” or “Reds.” I hope I don’t think of this trifle of a movie, trying its hardest to be a feel-good story about ladies in a senior community who form a cheerleading squad headed by the secretly dying Martha (Keaton). Of course, they are terrible; of course, there are mean people in the community who want to stop them; and of course, they rally in the end. There’s a good cast but a story that is a pastiche of elder cliches. And Keaton herself is a lousy cheerleader. I know many of my contemporaries found this movie to be cute and entertaining, and I’ll admit that it did get better in the second half, but overall, it was a waste of my time. 1½ cans.
105.  Otherhood* (2020, Netflix) – I miss the days when you could rely on Nora Ephron or Nancy Meyers for a good rom-com or female empowerment movie. This one could have used them. When three old friends don’t hear from their sons on Mother’s Day, they decide to take matters into their own hands, leave their Poughkeepsie, NY, homes and invade Manhattan, where their sons live. Of course, not connecting with your mother on Mother’s Day is unforgivable, but these meddling mothers could drive any son crazy. Carol (Angela Bassett) is a widow, Gillian (Roseanna Arquette) is married and disapproves of her son’s girlfriend, and Helen (Felicity Huffman) has never quite forgiven her cheating husband – whom she divorced 11 years ago – even though she is married now to a genuinely nice man. So, the moms invade, move in, interfere, and wreak all kinds of havoc with their sons. I found it ironic that Huffman, who spent time in jail for her role in the college admissions scandal, would be in this kind of movie. This is a highly acclaimed cast. Too bad the material didn’t measure up to their talent. 3 cans.
106.  Lion in the House* (2006, Netflix) – This two-part, four-hour documentary focuses on several brave children suffering from cancer, on their families and on the heroic doctors of Cincinnati Children’s Hospital who try whatever measures they can to save them. The doctors and parents are constantly forced to question themselves about making the best decisions for their young patients. Will she be able to tolerate the side effects of chemotherapy? Should he be sent to the ICU? Should they have a Do Not Resuscitate order in the file? This poignant series isn’t cheery and doesn’t come with all happy endings, but it gave me a better perspective on the suffering, healing and loss experienced by the parents, families, hospital staff and the young patients. 3½ cans.
107.  All My Life* (2020, Prime Video) – This romantic drama, based on a true story, is about a young couple who meet, fall in love, move in together and try to keep the good times rolling when bad things happen. Jessica Rothe and Harry Shum Jr. (he appeared in TV’s “Glee” but mostly as a dancer with little dialog) are the attractive young couple, surrounded by devoted friends who try to support them in every possible way. Worth seeing. 3½ cans.
108. RESPECT* (2021, IN THE MOVIES, but now available streaming!) – My first time back in an actual movie theater since March, 2020, was to see the story of the Queen of Soul, Aretha Franklin, and I made a great choice! This movie is a full look at the life and music of Aretha, the importance of the church in her singing career, the influence of her pastor father, the men who done her wrong and the decision to record not in Detroit, at Motown, but to capture the special magic of Muscle Shoals, Alabama. The movie shows how long it took Aretha to move from underselling standards to a brand of soul that was all her own, with such hits as “Chain of Fools,” “You Better Think,” and so many more, including the title tune. Jennifer Hudson, tapped by Aretha herself to play the Queen in this movie, more than lives up to Aretha’s expectations with a wondrous performance. And then there is that VOICE! Aretha Franklin was a gift from God and Jennifer Hudson did her proud. Expect Oscar nominations. PS – Stick around for the credits to see Aretha herself sing “Natural Woman” from her salute to songwriter Carole King at the Kennedy Center Honors. If you don’t get goosebumps, you can’t be alive!
4½ cans.
109.  Here Today* (2021, rented on Demand) – Billy Crystal is Charlie, an aging comedy writer living on his own and starting to show signs of dementia. Tiffany Haddish is Emma, a struggling singer who comes into his life when her ex wins a lunch with Charlie at an auction and she takes it instead, despite not knowing who he is. Somehow, these two hit it off right away, bonding over her near-fatal reaction to eating seafood at their lunch. Confession: Tiffany Haddish is one of my favorite performers. She is brassy, hilarious and has great timing and facial expressions. The two form a friendship and she encourages him to get busy with the book he is struggling to write. I seldom rent movies, but for $5.99 – less than the cost of a ticket in the movies – this sweet and charming movie was a bargain. 3½ cans
110.  Small Town News: KPVM Pahrump* (2021, HBO/HBO Max) – If “WKRP in Cincinnati” and “News Radio” had a real-life TV baby, it would be this quirky 6-part documentary series (30 minutes a segment). Vern Van Winkle (seriously, you can’t make this stuff up) is the owner of a small TV station in the Podunk town of Pahrump, Nevada, about an hour and a lifetime away from Las Vegas. The small but dedicated staff multi-tasks responsibilities ranging from news director/editor/writer/camera operator to the very genial John, the weatherman, who dresses for business on the top with a suit and tie and shorts on the bottom when he’s not golfing with advertisers. The on-camera talent is inexperienced but happy to tackle local issues, and even to cover a political rally when a Trump son lands in town. Vern is eager to expand to the bigger Las Vegas market, and by the end of the six parts here, he is looking for space in Sin City. Stay tuned for season two of this endearing and odd little show. 3½ cans.
111.  Presumed Innocent (1990, HBO) – Our legal system is predicated on the assumption of innocence among the accused, but things look pretty grim for Rusty Sabich (Harrison Ford) when he is accused of murdering his former colleague and lover (Greta Sacchi). There’s a glass with his fingerprints found in her apartment and other incriminating evidence against Rusty, who is an assistant prosecutor caught up in a political situation that makes him vulnerable to prosecution. This movie, adapted from the Scott Turow novel, combines suspense, courtroom drama, a great cast (Bonnie Bedelia, Brian Dennehy, Raul Julia, Paul Winfield) and plenty of shocks along the way. Yes, it is 31 years old, but it still holds up well. 3½ cans.
112.  Liza with a Z (1972, PBS) – Liza Minelli delivers a powerhouse performance in this filmed stage show, knocking out great numbers from her signature role in “Cabaret” and a bunch of other songs that put her unique talent in the spotlight. With her huge, unblinking eyes, iconic short haircut and ability to prance, stomp and glide around the stage, she is magnetic. The unmistakable stamp of director/choreographer Bob Fosse is as prominent as Minelli herself in this fierce performance, one that I had not seen in many years. It aired as part of the PBS fundraising drive, so I don’t know whether it is something you can find and watch there or elsewhere again, but I’m glad I caught it. 4 cans and a lot of glitter.
113. 9 to 5, The Story of a Movement* (2021, Netflix) – Before Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin and Dolly Parton teamed up on the movie “9 to 5” in 1980, there was a movement that had started in Boston among office workers who found themselves overlooked and underpaid. A few of these women (and yes, they were all women) realized they had plenty in common. They all experienced or knew of women belittled by their bosses, not paid for overtime, paid less than men and having little opportunity for training and advancement. They teamed up and the 9 2 5 movement was born, starting in Boston but eventually spreading across the US. These were women who were fed up with bosses demanding they do everything from write personal letters, peel carrots for their lunch and one whose boss made her sew his pants – while he was wearing them. There are great interviews here with the organizers of this movement, who educated themselves about discrimination and how existing laws from the National Labor Relations Act could protect and assist them. It wasn’t an easy sell, as many feared reprisals. But for change to occur, someone always has to be the leader, be brave enough to buck the system, and these women were smart and ready to take a risk. Very interesting story and one that I did not know. 3½ cans.
114.  Golden: The Journey of USA’s Elite Gymnasts* (2021, Peacock) – Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be gymnasts! This 6-part documentary takes viewers behind the scenes to show the grueling life of America’s finest women gymnasts and their families as they prepared to compete in events leading up to what became the 2021 Tokyo Olympics. These amazing athletes start young, train incessantly, endure injuries, surgeries, rehab and physical therapy while under constant pressure to be perfect in everything they do. Among those featured are some whose names you know and others who didn’t make the USA Olympic team. Those athletes are left to ponder whether they want to start their non-gymnastics lives or dedicate three more years to making the team in 2024. The series largely omits Simone Biles, the face of USA gymnastics, focusing instead on the competitors who were not locks to make the team. Former USA team member Laurie Hernandez, a star in 2016 as a 16-year old, is now a young woman whose insights add to this program. The gravity defying feats of these athletes are balanced by the many times they literally fall flat on their faces in practice, in tryouts and sometimes in competition. Compelling stuff here. 4 cans.
115.  CODA* (2021, Apple TV+) – High school student Ruby Rossi (Emilia Jones) doesn’t have much in common with her classmates. At 3 AM, she is up and working with her deaf parents and brother on their finishing boat before she even heads for class, where is likely to be found asleep at her desk. She loves to sing, and she has talent, but as the only person in her family who is not deaf (CODA stands for “children of deaf adults), she is the person her family relies on to communicate with the world and help maintain their business. Jones gives an outstanding performance (and she sings well, too) as a young woman torn between fulfilling her own dreams and keeping her family business afloat. When she is signing for her hippy parents (Marlee Matlin and Troy Kotsur) and her stubborn brother (Daniel Durant), she brings incredible physicality to the part. Years ago, Matlin, who is excellent here, won the Oscar for her debut in “Children of a Lesser God.” I wonder if Jones will see a chance to do the same based on this fine performance. 4 cans.
116.  The Desk Set (1957, Movies Channel) – This film is one of the many Spencer Tracy-Katharine Hepburn classics, where they meet, dislike and distrust each other, then end up together. Written by Phoebe and Henry Ephron (parents of Nora), the story is about an efficiency expert (him) brought in to install a gigantic computer to help the all-female research department she heads, a group more than capable of answering questions from the mundane to the ridiculous with startling efficiency. Hepburn’s Bunny has been dating an exec of the TV network where they work for years, but he never seems ready to pop the question, leaving room for Tracy’s guy to win her heart. This rom-com shows what offices were like back in the 1950s, complete with dancing at office Christmas parties. Granted, this movie is not the best in the Tracy-Hepburn collection, but it holds a special place in my heart. My father once played the Tracy role in an off-off-off-Broadway production (local community theater), a completely out-of-character thing for him to do. Mind you, this was so long ago that although my genius sister had memorized the entire play and ran lines with him, she was still young enough to wonder if Daddy was leaving Mommy for a new wife at the end!  I wonder if she will remember that! Dad’s production gets 5 cans, of course, but the movie only scores 3½.
117.  The History of the Sitcom* (2021, CNN) – I could have written this one, with my devotion to and extensive knowledge of the shows in this category. This eight-part documentary takes us through the socially-relevant sitcoms (All in the Family, Good Times, Maude) to the family sitcoms, the work and Friends sitcoms, the fantasy shows (Mr. Ed, My Mother the Car), the rural sitcoms (Green Acres, Beverly Hillbillies) and other classics. I was surprised how many shows I never watched, particularly more recent shows, but I attribute that lack of familiarity to the fact that I’m busy watching The Golden Girls reruns instead. Some of these shows reflected and changed our culture, while others provided just pure escapism (nobody can believe that the 7 people on Gilligan’s Island could do everything but make a raft to escape). My only quibble was the inclusion of The Love Boat and Eight is Enough and the exclusion of one of my all-time favorites, The Wonder Years. I just heard that The Munsters is getting a reboot, proving that everything old is new again. 4 cans.
118.  Bob Ross: Happy Accidents, Betrayal & Greed* (2021, Netflix) – The iconic PBS artist Bob Ross is fondly remembered for teaching us all how to put happy little trees on canvas, completing a full landscape picture in just the 24-minute length of his TV show. His calm voice and positive attitude assured us all that we could be artists, too. But behind the canvas, things weren’t quite so sanguine, as Bob’s partners sought to control every aspect of the empire he built with his show, selling brushes and paints and conducting live art classes. Even when he was on his deathbed, dying from the cancer that they refused to inform people about, they tried to coerce his son into getting his father’s signature on a contract that would give them rights to his name in perpetuity. I think I would have been better off missing this story and remembering Bob as someone whose shows I keep on my DVR to help lull me to sleep. 3 cans of paint.
 

Tokyo 2021 Olympic Observations

Once every four years (in this case, five), I find myself waking up at 4 am to watch a women’s soccer game or beach volleyball. Welcome to the Olympics, when people who are household names and those who are unknown, all with stories, emerge as heroes. It is thrilling to watch unfold, and I cannot stop watching! I’m sure my observations here are similar to what I expressed watching the Rio Games in 2016, but I thought they were worth sharing.

We are a few days into the delayed Tokyo 2020 Olympics (or so say most of the signs I’ve seen), and I’m having trouble with the multiple places where sports are televised and with the time zones. I started watching a women’s soccer game the other day and realized it took place several days ago, so, no, the USWNT was NOT losing to Sweden AGAIN. I can watch the next game around 5 AM tomorrow. Fine, since I will probably be awake anyway.

The Opening Ceremonies were bizarre, with no one in the stands and the athletes all masked up.  I’m still conflicted as to whether even having the games is a good idea. As you will see, I watched anyway.

I am watching other sports that I never get to see and find them very entertaining. Rugby, for example. You can be on the ground and the play still isn’t over!

I caught a bit of women’s water polo the other day, where the US trounced the opposition. I had no idea whether scoring 25 times was the norm. What goes on under the water that you can only see with a special camera shows these players pushing, shoving and grabbing each other. It’s like watching rugby!

I watched some men’s and women’s handball, a sport like soccer except that you CAN use your hands on the ball. It’s also like basketball, which made me want to call traveling more than once as the players moved around with the ball.

This 3x3 basketball is fast and exciting, but how is this different from pick-up hoops in the park – except that the players wear uniforms? Congrats to the USA Women’s team for picking up the first-ever gold medal in that sport.

The triathlon is crazy! Swimming, biking and running. I would need a change of clothes and a couple of days (along with public transportation) to get through the course. How do they get those shoes on so fast after the initial swimming leg of the race, as they jump on their bikes?

Those badminton and table tennis players are VICIOUS! These are not your backyard or basement sports. They SLAM that shuttlecock and ping pong ball at each other!

Each Olympics, the swimmers play a big role. Katie Ledecky is on TV everywhere. But fame is fleeting; I had to look up the name of the last “It” girl for the US, because I couldn’t remember Missy Franklin.

The physiques on the swimmers are like giant Vs – broad shoulders, narrow waists and long arms. And, unlike the last Olympics, I didn't see any swimmers with those "cupping" marks all over their bodies. Maybe that technique just didn't deliver the desired results.

I had the TV on when the taekwondo people came out, but they were still wearing bathrobes, so I figured they weren’t ready yet. Or was that jujitsu?

You can’t call the Russians the Russians anymore since they were caught doping (old news…), so now the athletes compete for the Russian Olympic Committee, or ROC. Like we don’t know who’s who (wink, wink).

I could NEVER play beach volleyball. I understand that the sand is burning hot, and there are just two people on each side. The women wear skimpy bikinis, which I think it just WRONG. Put them in shorts and a fitted shirt so when they hit the burning sand, they will be protected.

Women’s soccer is exciting, but there is SO MUCH PRESSURE on the US team to win – again. This time they took home the Bronze Medal, and with so many players aged 35 and above, it is likely that the National Team will include many new faces in the future. Thank you, RU's own Carli Llyod, for your magnificent career, capped by scoring two goals in what might be her final game. What am I supposed to do at 4 AM now that soccer is done? 

The weather reports said that there was a typhoon possibly heading to Japan, so some of the rowing events had to be moved up so the water wouldn’t be too choppy for them to compete. But surfing, new to the Olympics, was thrilled at the prospect of big waves.

I watched a little bit of softball, which barely resembles the game I used to play. Those women can sure put some mustard on the ball! And by the way, why was softball eliminated from the Olympics a while back? Now it’s back, but it is a bona fide sport that should never have been sidelined.

Skateboarding is making its Olympic debut. The competitors all look like guys hanging around the park, and the tricks they do they could have practiced at the entrance to the J&J complex in New Brunswick, where skateboarders loved jumping over the stairs and hitting the railing before the security team could chase them away.

While I wasn’t expecting Bob Costas or Matt Lauer to show up as studio hosts this time around, I was struck by how many British accents there were from commentators and hosts I have never seen previously. Did you notice, too?

What does Tim Daggett (the gymnastics analyst) do between Olympics? They have been dragging him out since he competed for the US in the 70s. Oh, and one country has a gymnast who is in her 8th Olympics at age 49. I can’t imagine spending most of my life in a leotard.

I also can’t imagine having the amount of pressure and hype that some of these athletes have. They train for years to run or swim for scant seconds to win medals. To see local NJ girl Sydney McLaughlin, an alum of Union Catholic High School (where some of my friends went) not only take the gold in the women’s 400-meter hurdles but set a new world record was so exciting. Sydney is only 21 and who knows if we will get to see her defend her title in Paris in three years? Oy, the pressure!

I wonder who will be on the box of Wheaties. It could be Jersey girl Sydney McLaughlin. Or all-time Olympic track medalist Allyson Felix, who now is the holder of 11 – count ‘em, 11 – Medals. On Sydney’s 21st birthday, she teamed up with Felix, Athing Mu and Dalilah Muhammad to capture the Gold Medal in the women’s 400-meter relay. The win moved Felix to the top of the list of track and field medal winners. When you consider the likes of Carl Lewis, the late, great Flo Jo, Jackie Joyner-Kersey and so many other outstanding track athletes, you have to stand in awe of what Felix has accomplished. At age 35, after having given birth to a daughter and suffering from serious complications. she was offered a significantly reduced contract by her sponsor, Nike. So, she started her own shoe company, which will make shoes for women, designed by women. Then she competed in her 5th Olympics, won two medals at the games and made history. Or is it HERstory?

How on earth do synchronized divers stay in sync? And why do the divers have such tiny towels? They get wet, so don’t they need something larger than a washcloth?

I marveled at the choreography and skill of the artistic swimmers, who can toss each other way up in the air, where the flyers reenter the pool with grace and beauty. These ladies can hold their breath while they perform routines upside down! I’m going to suggest to my aqua aerobics group that we all order the same bathing suits, slick back our hair and give it a try!

I have never watched any of the equestrian events, but this year, well, you know: Jessica Springsteen, daughter of Bruce and Patty Scialfa, competed and took home a silver medal in a show jumping team event. The horses are amazing, soaring over fences (I don’t know the official name) that are really high, and sometimes doing several jumps right in a row. But I also wonder, aside from tradition, what’s the point of the riders wearing those cutaway jackets and ties?

Rhythmic gymnastics is intriguing. The athletes use 20-foot long, colorful ribbons and what looks like hula hoops or balls that they toss high into the air and have to catch gracefully after doing difficult floor routines. The ribbons have multiple colors and look beautiful as they move swiftly through the air. How does one get started in this event?

Why does one indoor volleyball player wear a uniform different from his teammates? Did he forget to pack the right one? And why do the team volleyball players and even the beach volleyball players have to hug after every play? Is this the volleyball equivalent of a football huddle? Anyway, the USA women’s beach volleyball team and the indoor volleyball team each had a happy ending and won the Gold Medal.

I loved the American marathon runner Molly Seidel, who, after winning the Bronze medal, told her family watching at home to “drink a beer for me.” It was just her third marathon EVER! To get to the Olympics, she had to overcome OCD and an eating disorder that caused her to miss trying out for the Olympics in 2016. Somebody give that woman a beer!

Congratulations to the USA Men’s and Women’s basketball teams for taking the Gold Medal in their events. The women’s team captured its 7th consecutive Gold Medal, and team stalwarts Sue Bird and Diana Taurasi took home their 5th golds. USA Coach Dawn Staley has now won as a coach, an assistant coach and as a player who took home three Gold Medals. The Japanese team they defeated in the finals played fast and exciting basketball but suffered significantly from a height differential and could not stop big Brittney Griner, who poured in 30 points from the paint. The men’s team, without such marque names as LeBron James, Anthony Davis, Ja Morant, Kwaii Leonard and others, still outclassed the field to take the Gold and showcased so many up and coming stars. One thing for sure is the rise of international players in this game. There’s plenty of talent out there, and we may never see this level of dominance again.

In the first week of competition, Simone Biles, the GOAT (greatest of all-time) of women’s gymnastics, withdrew from team competition with what was called a “medical issue.” Later, she explained that it has to do with her mental health. Imagine being on the cover of every magazine, the center of attention in the Olympics and in your sport, always expected to be perfect. She also admitted to suffering from “the twisties,” where she could not determine where she was in the air. My heart races just watching her. If she never does another somersault or handstand or impossible vault, she will still be the best who ever lived in her sport. She did come back to take the bronze medal on the balance beam, which has far fewer spinning movements, especially since, as she explained, she downgraded her dismount. I hope she can take the time to appreciate her accomplishments and fill the rest of her life with great joy and satisfaction. May she have as much joy as she has given others. Meanwhile, her situation opened the door for her teammates, who took home many medals that they worked hard for and deserved. In an interview on the “Today Show,” with the team members gathered, they were asked who their role models are. Simone offered Naomi Osaka, Venus Williams and LeBron James. Her teammates unanimously named Simone Biles as their role model.

And that’s a wrap on the Tokyo Olympics. As Diana Taurasi quipped as she left the basketball court with her 5th Gold Medal, “See you in Paris!”