February 2022 Movies & More

There were lots of "whodunits" in this month's collection of movies & more, and even a Broadway show! All entries are rated on a scale of 1-5 cans of tuna fish, with 5 the top ranking. Numbering picks up from previous months and things I had not seen previously are marked with an asterisk. 

16.  The Gospel According to Andre* (2017, HBO) – Andre Leon Talley, who died earlier this year, was always in fashion. As a journalist who adored supporting new designers, Tally understood current fashion and the history of fashion. This documentary features extensive interviews with him and we get to watch as he highlights iconic designers and works with the diva of fashion journalism, Diana Vreeland of Vogue, and later Anna Wintour. He was the first African American news director and creative director for Vogue, where he later served as an editor at large. His Southern roots and life as a child with his grandmother influenced his outlook (and his love of hats). Andre was larger than life in every respect, and never out of style. 3½ cans.
17.  And Just Like That* (2021, HBO Max) – For a while there, I thought this limited series, a follow-up to the gem “Sex and the City,” would tarnish the reputation of the long-running HBO series with devout New Yorkers Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker), Miranda (Cynthia Nixon) and Charlotte (Kristin Davis) – if the last SATC movie hadn’t done enough damage already. Our favorite fashionistas are in their 50s now, about the game age today as “The Golden Girls” were when they started their series, but the comparison ends there. These women are still raucous – although without the fourth member, Samantha (Kim Cattrall), they aren’t nearly as randy. This season – which could be the first or the last – showed all of the women going through big changes, starting in episode 1, where Carrie’s now long-time husband, Big (actually named John), dies of a heart attack after a rigorous workout on his Peloton bike. Carrie wins the adjustment contest as she gets through a year of loss and exploration. So as not to spoil the rest of the series for anyone who wants to and hasn’t seen it yet, I’ll just say that there are plenty of adjustments to be made. I wasn’t a big fan of this new series up until the last episode, which made me appreciate the bonds between these dear friends – even if they can’t all get it together in the end. Kudos to Sarah Jessica Parker for playing Carrie as a woman who realizes that her life will never be the same but will endure. The lamp in the last episode made me love at least the finale if not the entire season. 3½ cans.
18.  And Just Like That – The Documentary* (2022, HBO Max) – This documentary is a love letter about the reconstituted “Sex & the City” sequel “And Just Like That,” delving into the relaunch this season with plenty of homage paid to the past – particularly the storied wardrobe that was integral to the Carrie Bradshaw persona. The clothing has been lovingly retained and is as welcomed back as an old friend, both by the behind-the-scenes staff and star Sarah Jessica Parker herself. I love seeing how these things come together, so this film was right up my alley. 3½ cosmos.
19.  Breaking News in Yuba County* (2021, Hulu) – Sue Buttons (Allison Janney) is not having a good birthday. First, the store has messed up her name on the cake she had to order for herself.  Second, her dolt of a husband fails to acknowledge her special day. And things only get worse in this black comedy with a twisty plot and stellar cast. Maybe the news media will pay attention to Sue when she reports her husband missing and goes on air to explain the break-in in her house and the alleged kidnapping of her spouse. She doesn’t know that he has been laundering money for some pretty bad folks, all while having an affair. If you like quirky plots and characters and don’t mind a lot of shooting and deaths, this one’s for you. Anything Allison Janney is in is good enough for me. 3½ cans.
20.  The Tinder Swindler* (2022, Netflix) – Of course you would swipe right when you got a look on the dating app Tinder at Simon, the handsome son of a billionaire in the diamond business. And he didn’t disappoint, whisking first dates away by private jet to 5-star hotels, driving expensive cars and wearing designer clothes. The first date was followed by attentive phone calls, texts, messages of love and a future together. Yet, as his fascinating documentary reveals, Simon was not exactly what he portrayed himself to be. Promises of a lavish and loving future were followed by the request of money to tide him over – purportedly from his “enemies,” but more realistically to finance his next courtship. I don’t know how serial cheaters can keep all their women straight, and, in this case, how Simon could coax them into taking out huge loans and turning over their life savings to “help” him. This is the story of three of his victims, and it was totally engrossing. I couldn’t figure out why none of the women encouraged Simon to simply ask his billionaire father for the money he swore he needed and would pay back, but I guess love is blind after all. 4 cans and at least twice as many years behind bars for this con man – or so I would hope.
21.  My Blue Heaven (1990, HBO) – Vinny Antonelli (Steve Martin) is placed into the Witness Protection Program so that he can safely testify against his fellow mobsters, except, in Vinny’s case, changing his name to Terry and suddenly residing in the suburbs is more than he can handle (he looks absurdly funny wearing his sharkskin suit to mow the lawn).  Keeping a low profile is not in Vinny’s wheelhouse, so, despite his own personal FBI man (Rick Moranis) assigned to keep him out of trouble, a dedicated but lonely prosecutor (Joan Cusack) working to get his testimony, and a legion of family and fellow mobster friends, Vinny is out and about, ordering new suits and buying them for his FBI guy, trying to tip the airline flight attendant and, well, just being Vinny. This is a silly little movie, but Martin’s performance transcends the material. He is all twitchy and full of swag and really hard not to like. I couldn’t take my eyes off Martin’s hair, which was brown and spiky instead of his trademark white locks. 3 cans.
22.  The Queen of Basketball* (2021, YouTube) – Back in the 1970s, just after Title IX was passed to give collegiate women the same opportunities in athletics as men had already enjoyed, one woman stood head and shoulders above the rest. Lucia “Lucy” Harris, a native of Mississippi and the daughter of sharecroppers, enrolled at Delta State and helped women’s basketball begin its rise. This documentary, told by Lucy herself, shows her leading the Lady Statesmen to three consecutive AIAW championships (the NCAA had not yet taken over women’s sports), dethroning the Mighty Macs of tiny Immaculata College. At 6’3”, Lucy dominated in the paint and on at least one occasion, outscored the opposing team all by herself. Although she played in the Olympics and was drafted by the NBA’s New Orleans Saints, Lucy saw her playing career end. You cannot appreciate the history of women’s basketball without paying homage to the late, great Lucia Harris, who died earlier this year. Thanks to NBA great Shaquille O’Neal for producing this short (22 minutes), sweet but sad look at one of the best basketball players ever. 3½ cans.
23.  Spencer* (2021, free on Hulu) – In the beginning of this morose look at young Princess Diana, she is driving through the British countryside alone in a sports car, unaccompanied by security or attendants, and lost – even though her former family home was in the area. She is lost in much of the rest of the movie, too. Let’s face it, many people don’t like spending the holidays with the family, but, in this case, Diana (Kristen Stewart) is stuck in a cold house (the Royals eschew turning up the heat and would rather distribute blankets) where she is told when to eat, what to wear (a rack of clothing is rolled into her room, all labeled by day and activity) and who will be at her service. The servants are warned that “they can hear us” and Diana might just as well sing “Every Breath You Take,” because everyone is watching every move she makes. Scorned for her eating disorder by her estranged husband, Prince Charles (Jack Farthing), who has already moved on with Camila, Diana is left alone to fantasize about misbehaving and getting out. Her only solace is the brief opportunity to spend time with her boys, young Princes William and Harry. She is a prisoner in a gilded cage, eager and helpless to escape. The whole movie is unsettling, with spooky music and evil characters, and it portrays a kind of medieval torture of a vibrant young woman who is forced to follow a path she never quite understood or accepted. 3½ cans.
24.  Marry Me* (2022, free on Peacock and also playing in theaters) – It’s Valentine’s Day season, so what we need is a sweet and frothy rom-com – and this one delivers. Pop superstar Kat Valdez (Jennifer Lopez) is about to marry the love of her life, Latin singer Bastian (Maluma) on stage at Madison Square Garden when she finds out he has cheated on her with her assistant. She impulsively turns to a random guy in the audience holding up a sign saying “Marry Me,” the megahit she wrote and performs with Bastian, and hauls him up on stage to be the substitute groom. The guy is Charlie (Owen Wilson), a nerdy math teacher in NY, divorced and the father of a 12-year old girl.  Kat’s life is a series of photoshoots, commercials, concerts, appearances on TV and pretty much what you imagine Lopez’ actual life to be, especially since she and former flame Ben Affleck have reunited. So where does this leave sweet, nice, leader of the Mathletes Charlie? The man still has a flip phone, after all. Can two people so completely different find common ground? Lopez, who has been trying to convince us all that she’s still Jenny from the block for years, does a great job of being both the celebrated star and a pretty normal woman (considering the circumstances), and Wilson is a goofy, lovable guy who helps to ground her. There are adorable scenes at his school and elsewhere as Kat tries to figure out what is best for her. As rom-coms go, this isn’t exactly “When Harry Met Sally,” but it is sweet and cute and the leads are irresistible. 3½ cans.
25.  Inventing Anna* (2022, Netflix) – You can’t make this stuff up, though the disclaimer on this fact-based limited series says they did – at least some of it. This series is about Anna Delvey (Julia Garner), a Russian (or is she German?) socialite heiress who may be broke but spends lavishly on herself and on her friends while trying to bilk millions from US banks and investment firms so she can start her cooler-than-cool exclusive club. But her credit cards are denied at the four-star hotels she frequents and there are problems with wire transfers – and the dog ate my homework. What a brazen conniver, who could lie straight in someone’s face and almost get away with it. The other half of this story is about journalist Vivian Kent (Anna Chumsky), who is so hell-bent on getting Anna’s story and she practically ignores the imminent birth of her child so she can complete writing it for the magazine where she works. Both Anna and Vivian are desperate in their own ways and they strike up a grudging kind of friendship. This is one fascinating story that didn’t have to be nine parts (each runs an hour) to be complete. I think six episodes could have done the trick. I watched it over three days, but if you really have no life, binge it. It is bingeworthy. And completely true. Except for the parts they made up. 4 cans.
26.  Death of the Nile* (2022, at the movies) – Kenneth Branaugh has created a stylish whodunit murder mystery with himself as director and famed detective Hercule Poirot. Though it takes about an hour for death to be a part of this story, when it happens, it happens not just once, leaving a host of suspects and more potential victims. The lush setting is a riverboat on the Nile, where glamorous Linnet (Gal Gadot) and her handsome husband Simon (Armie Hammer) have taken their wedding guests to celebrate their honeymoon. The scenery is stunning and the plot compelling as in most Agatha Christie mysteries as Poirot is asked to not only solve the case but to prevent more murder and mayhem. And now we know why Poirot wears that big mustache, too. 4 cans.
27.  Imposters, Season 1* (2017, Netflix) – Netflix has demonstrated a predilection of late to air programs about people who pretend to be something/someone they are not (See “The Tinder Swindler” and “Inventing Anna”).  And I’m all in. This drama/comedy series gives us 10 episodes in which the twists and turns, and, more importantly, the cons, never stop. Ezra Bloom seems like a nice guy who is totally in love with his beautiful Belgian wife, Ava – until one day when she cleans out their bank accounts and leaves him with nothing more than a website message and a folder containing family secrets that she swears she will reveal if he comes looking for her. It turns out, he wasn’t her only mark. I won’t spoil the ride here because this series is fast-paced and fun to watch. Season 2 is now out, and I’m in! 4 cans.
28.  Kareem: Minority of One* (2015, HBO) – It would be hard to overlook Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. At 7’1”+, he stands head and shoulders above most of his contemporaries as an athlete, an activist and as the NBA’s all-time leading scorer. This HBO film does a thorough job of documenting his life from grade school through to 2000, from then Lew Alcindor dominating New York City high school basketball, taking his skills to UCLA to play for the legendary John Wooden and his championships with the Bucks and Lakers. When the NCAA outlawed dunks, he developed his signature “Sky Hook,” which his competitors like Larry Bird called “unstoppable.” But this film does more than cover his basketball career; it explains his name change and religious beliefs, talks about his family and his activism. He really is one of the more interesting and compelling figures of his time. 4 cans.
29.  All About Eve (1950, Cable TV) – This movie is made the way movies used to be made, with crackling dialog, fierce performances (see Davis, Bette) and actual plots. Bette is Margo Channing, temperamental Broadway star, world-weary bon vivant and demanding boss of her minions and her man (Gary Merrill). Then along comes star-struck Eve Harrington (Anne Baxter), destined to worship Margo, who willingly accepts her adulation without initially discerning her ulterior motives. When Margo begins to understand the plot here and utters her famous line, “Fasten your seatbelts. It’s going to be a bumpy night,” it is game on. This is a classic, must-see movie. 4½ cans.
30.  MJ: The Musical* (Broadway) – I returned to Broadway for the first time in more than two years to see this spectacular musical about Michael Jackson. Every iconic move, dazzling outfit, hat and glove is there to recall the immensely talented Jackson from the time he started with his brothers as the Jackson 5 to his emergence as the King of Pop. There were so many songs made famous by or written by Michael Jackson and all are performed with flare. This isn’t exactly like the “jukebox” musicals that have dominated Broadway since Mama Mia gave us the Abba catalog with a contrived script. It revolves around Michael’s upcoming “Dangerous” tour while also showing his show-biz roots and early successes. He seems haunted, childlike and determined to deliver his best – despite the cost. This show is decidedly not “The Music Man,” but it packs powerhouse performances and every bit of the Michael Jackson we choose to remember. 4 cans.

February Bits and Pieces

I don’t play Wordle, the new game that has gained enough popularity that it was just purchased by The New York Times, but I sure see that my friends do. Honestly, I don’t care about your Wordle score, so do you have to post it every day? I hope the originator runs out of 5-letter words!

I realized on February 2 that this month has a 2/2/22 and also a 2/22/22. Maybe I should play the lottery with those numbers – not that I know how to play the lottery!

I have been watching the sumptuous “The Gilded Age” on TV and I’m here to say that bustles do no one any favors. The hats, however, are superb.

Just wondering: Does anyone ever actually put gloves in the glove compartment of their car?

The Super Bowl, the one day all year when everybody uses Roman numerals.

It’s not so much the cooking I mind, it’s the clean-up. On second thought, I mind the cooking, too.

Of all the knives I have in my kitchen – some expensive and many professionally sharpened – my go-to knife is one I bought from a TV infomercial decades ago. It is serrated, never needs sharpening, and has dissected many a bagel in its time. It was worth the sleepless night that led me to watch the infomercial in the first place.

Hotdogs are the only food I prefer well done. My mother always overcooked everything and once even burned the soup – which she denied, saying that you can’t burn soup (I beg to differ). When she would overcook or burn dinner, her standard reply was, “Everybody eats it like that.” And if I went further in my objection, she would say, “Maybe your next mother will be better.” I miss those clever retorts!

I wish you could have seen me yesterday. I had such a good hair day. Too bad no one got to witness it but me!

I threw caution and Lipitor to the wind this week when I ate a grapefruit. Because I’m on Lipitor for my cholesterol, I’m supposed to avoid eating grapefruit because of an interaction with the drug, but once a year I indulge myself. The young folks might call this YOLO – You Only Live Once – but young folks don’t care about grapefruit and probably aren’t taking Lipitor.

Snow days seemed like such a gift when I was growing up. My sister and I would huddle around the radio, waiting for Jack Ellery on WCTC to announce the name of our school in the list of school closings: Sayreville, Somerville! South Amboy! We would hear the town fire whistle blow at exactly 7 AM (or was it 7:30?), letting us know that school was closed for the day (it was a small town with a really LOUD fire whistle). Back then, it had to be a REAL snowstorm, not some mamby-pamby little dusting that makes schools declare closings the night before, only to have virtually no snow, or at least none worth closing school. Those were the days, my friends.

I truly don’t understand the issue with children consuming Tide Pods. I can’t even get the package open, and, when I do, I can’t get it closed. Just store them up high, folks, where even I can’t reach them. 

And speaking of packaging, is it just me or are things getting harder to open? I’m not talking about the blister packs that protect batteries from God-knows-what and practically require the jaws of life to pry apart. Even the package of my Panera brand chicken dish required me to stab it with a knife like a murderer just to pop it into the microwave. I know we all have problems opening those flimsy produce bags in the supermarket, but I am talking about packaging that we find on so many everyday things that could survive a nuclear holocaust. Remember how exhausting it was to unwrap a CD? Things have only gotten worse. I used three utensils, including a screwdriver, to try to pry the top off of my fruit salad container. In five more minutes, I was going to call for the jaws of life.

I keep seeing Sonic ads for patty melts. Aren’t these nothing more than a cheeseburger on toasted bread instead of a bun, or a grilled cheese with a hamburger?

Anyone who is an expert in technology should be called a techspert. I guess that means if you are really good at sex, you should be called a sexpert.

It is impossible to wear a sweater with long, flared sleeves and not get it wet – unless you don’t wash your hands all day. Yuck!

Remember when you couldn’t use deodorant after you shaved your underarms because it would sting too much? Remember shaving your underarms? Now I have to remember NOT to wear deodorant on the day I go for a mammogram. I literally HIDE the deodorant so I don’t inadvertently use it.

I know we all have a million decisions to make, some lifechanging and others as simple as choosing a color in the nail salon. But that is not a simple decision. I know this choice shouldn’t seem so hard, but there are a zillion colors. There’s the actual color – which could look vastly different in the salon vs. outside in the natural light – and then the option of colors that sparkle and shine or having “nail art” done on your finger, and whether your fingers should match your toes if you’re also getting a pedicure. A friend of mine told me about one occasion where she had her nails done and drove down the street to a different salon to have the polish removed and just have a “color change,” not a full manicure. (She was too embarrassed to ask the original salon to do it.) All of this just proves my motto: “Nothing is easy.”

What is the proper etiquette for sneezing these days? I’m still wearing a mask everywhere I go, and if I am with other people and have to sneeze, I feel like a criminal. Plus, sneezing with the mask on is really unpleasant. Should I remove it and sneeze into my elbow? Or keep it on and have to contend with a wet mask?

I’m ending this month on a serious note, saluting my old friend Sally Lapelosa, who passed away at age 89 on January 31. I knew of Sally from J&J, where she was one of the few women in charge of anything when she ran administrative services. She had a reputation as a tough but fair lady, and one who got the job done right. Legions of people who started in the mailroom worked under Sally and could tell you she was a formidable force. I got to be friends with her via Rutgers Women’s Basketball, where she was a long-time season ticket holder and ardent fan. When she spotted me alone at a tournament, surrounded by UConn fans and in hostile territory, she made me switch my seat and come and sit with the official fan club, the Cagers Club, an army of scarlet-clad adults who followed the team. Sally, our late friend Rose and I often hit the road together, going to Georgetown or Villanova, to Oklahoma, Puerto Rico, St. Thomas and El Paso. Sally was with me when Rutgers won the WNIT Championship in 2014, and she was sitting so close to the team she might have been mistaken for a coach. She knew enough about basketball to be one. She stopped traveling in recent years, but we stayed in touch, met for lunch at Fresco’s in East Brunswick, near her home, and often talked on the phone about basketball, business and life. It will take me a while to get adjusted to not picking up the phone to discuss the team’s latest game or a news story about J&J. Sally, it was a great ride, and now you are with a special team watching over the Rutgers Scarlet Knights from the best seat in the house. I miss my friend.