Tina's May 2021 Movies & More

It is Memorial Day weekend, so you have an extra day to take in a few movies and special programs with this edition Movies & More. Numbering picks up from the previous month, and movies not seen previously are marked with an asterisk. As always, everything is rated on a scale of 1-5 cans of tuna fish, with 5 being the top.

 65.  Olympia* (2018, Apple TV+ rental) – Most of us remember actress Olympia Dukakis best for her feisty roles in “Steel Magnolias” and her Oscar-winning portrayal of Cher’s mother in “Moonstruck.” But in real life, the Greek-born actress, who died on May 1, was more than her defining roles. In this documentary, she is shown as a person of principle, one who founded a theater company so she could play the best parts, for whom accolades were largely meaningless (except for the Oscar, as she readily admits) and who is a salty, tough-minded woman. At age 80, she lets the camera take close-ups of her face while she applies make-up, and she is really beautiful. The film takes us on the road with Dukakis as she does everything from picking up awards to visiting her mother’s village in Greece. This biography covers a lot of territory in a somewhat meandering way, but I enjoyed the chance to get to know Olympia Dukakis in a new light. 3½ cans.
66.  College Behind Bars* (2019, Netflix) – The college students in this documentary have ambition, drive and intellectual curiosity. They are working hard to obtain either an associate’s degree or a bachelor’s degree from Bard College, but they live and work decidedly off-campus. They are all prisoners in penal institutions in New York State. Shown in this 4-part series are men and women who freely admit their crimes, don’t gloss over their convictions but remain equally committed to getting a degree. As one inmate points out, the prisons are run by the Department of Corrections, so shouldn’t they help the prisoners correct their behavior so they can turn their lives around? Each inmate has a story, and they are compelling. Just getting into the program is very competitive and you have to consider that they have to do all of their research from books they must request from Bard since they have no access to the Internet in lockdown. This is high-level work and requires readings that I don’t think I did in college. And before you start complaining that you don’t want your taxpayer money to give these offenders a chance that other people don’t have, you should know that the Bard Prison Initiative is funded by private contributions. This is a moving series that left me with a lump in my throat and hope in my heart. 4 cans.
67.  Some Kind of Wonderful (1987, EPIX) – Unrequited teenage love and angst predominates this classic ‘80s movie. Keith (Eric Stolz) has a huge crush on a girl clearly out of his league, Amanda (Lea Thompson), who is already paired off with HS stud Hardy (Craig Sheffer). Keith hangs around with BFF Watts (Mary Stuart Masterson in an adorable short haircut), a drum-playing tomboy with a huge crush on Keith. Can/will Watts help Keith get the girl of his dreams? Will Keith realize that his best friend is really his best option? The late director John Hughes turned out plenty of these movies in his day, and this one is endearing but not at the top of his list. 3½ cans.
68.  This Is a Robbery* (2021, Netflix) – Imagine being brazen enough to dress as Boston cops, get into a premiere museum, tie up the guards and leave with a treasure-trove of irreplaceable art by such masters as Rembrandt. This Netflix four-part documentary recounts the still-unsolved heist at the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum in Boston on St. Patrick’s Day, 1990. What could the thieves do with these priceless treasures? Could they sell them? Where did they stash them? Who would know the layout of the museum and the value of the specific items stolen? Those questions, among others, have perplexed the authorities for decades. They have their theories, including one involving a known art thief and others that tie the Italian Cosa Nostra and Irish mob to the heist, but despite rewards of up to $10 million and claims by various individuals that they have seen or know what happened to the art, no one has yet been convicted of the crime. This is a complex case, but I would have preferred it be told a little more succinctly than spread over 4 hours. Still, it was very intriguing. 4 Rembrandts.
69.  Fractured* (2019, Netflix) – I love the money “Fracture,” so I thought I’d give this similar sounding one a chance. Both movies are full of intrigue, but this one has the added element of dream vs. reality. Sam Worthington is Ray Monroe. He and his wife Joanne (Lily Rabe) and 6-year-old daughter are traveling to see family on Thanksgiving, but their daughter falls and breaks her arm and Sam falls and smacks his head. Sam rushes his family to the nearest hospital, forgoing care for his injuries and urging the crowded hospital to take care of his daughter. While he is anxiously awaiting an update on a CAT scan, they disappear. There is no record of Sam signing them in, no proof that he didn’t come in alone for his head injury. Frantic, Sam goes up against the hospital staff and police as he races to find out what happened to his family. The thrills are amped up, as is Sam, but some of the story is tough to accept. I hope someone here will watch it so we can discuss what really happened! 3 cans.
70.  Risky Business (1983, HBO) – I will never be able to listen to Bob Seger sing “Old Time Rock N Roll” without thinking of Tom Cruise sliding across the opening of the living room of his parent’s house in his socks, pink button-down shirt and white Jockey shorts. Cruise is the aptly named Joel Goodsen, an earnest high school student feeling the pressure of trying to get into Princeton, stay in his parent’s good graces, and, like all of his buddies, get laid. One call to call girl Lana (Rebecca DeMornay) takes care of the latter but leads him to an adventure that involves wrecking his father’s prized Porshe, having a valuable artifact stolen, being chased by Guido the Killer Pimp the night before an algebra midterm, and riding on the train with Lana on a trip he won’t soon forget. He didn’t intend to turn his parent’s house into a brothel while they were out of town visiting dear Aunt Tudy, but, hey, with the Porshe underwater and the Killer Pimp (Joe Pantoliano in a great performance) demanding money for the precious egg, it seemed like a good idea at the time. After all, as his buddy tells him, every now and then, you just have to say, “What the F*#&.” PS – He gets into Princeton.  4 cans.
71.  144* (2021, ESPN) – Most of us would like to forget 2020, but for the 144 women who make up the Women’s National Basketball Association (WNBA, with 12 teams and 12-women rosters), 2020 was a season to remember. The usual starting date in spring was pushed to summer, and the players, coaches and staff had to agree to live and work at one site in Florida, fondly referred to as the “Wubble” (WNBA Bubble), where they played all of their games without fans in the stands. They were tested every day for COVID, confined to their rooms or villas within a resort area to prevent any possible outbreak. They also came together to lend their visible and vocal support for social justice, shining light on the killing of Breona Taylor through the “Say Her Name” campaign by wearing uniforms bearing Taylor’s name on the back. They held rallies, refused to play for two days after the police shot Jacob Black, and used their platform to keep the stories in the news. When the part owner of the Atlanta Dream, Senator Kelly Loeffler, condemned them for their social justice focus, they started wearing shirts with the name of her opponent, Rev. Warnock, to rally support and they turned the election in Warnock’s favor. Congratulations to the WNBA for an unforgettable season and effort, and kudos for player/producer Chiney Ogwumike, a bright star as a player and a broadcaster, for delving into the thought process of these 144 remarkable women and showing how athletes do much more than just dribble the ball.
72.  The Woman in the Window* (2021, Netflix) – Let’s start with the fact that the book was better. But even when I read the book, I could see this as a movie. Amy Adams is Dr. Anna Fox, an agoraphobic woman who thinks she has witnessed a murder from her perch at her window. Her possible delirium is exacerbated by copious consumption of pills and alcohol (I don’t think you are supposed to wash down the drugs with liquor) and memories of a family tragedy. Nothing in her world is exactly what it seems. This is a psychological thriller, which means the presence of ominous music and your desire to yell at the characters to warn them about what is about to happen. It is reminiscent of Hitchcock’s classic “Rear Window” because of the obsession with watching the neighbors and trying to solve the mystery, but it pales by comparison. 3½ cans.
73.  State of Play* (2009, Netflix) – Congressman Steven Collins and journalist Cal McAffrey (Ben Affleck and Russell Crowe) tangle when a woman on the Congressman’s staff is murdered and Crowe finds out that his old pal was having an affair with the young lady. Can he solve the mystery and will he betray his buddy to uphold his journalistic standards? Will he get through the cover-up and his own relationship with the Congressman’s wife and find and report the truth? There’s a good cast on hand (Helen Mirren as the newspaper boss, Robin Wright as the Congressman’s wife, Rachel McAdam as a newspaper colleague) and the performances are good, but I kept feeling like the journalist part was just a little too noble. 3½ cans.
74.  The Fundamentals of Caring* (2016, Netflix) – Ben (the ageless Paul Rudd) is on a downward spiral after tragically losing his young son and being sued for divorce by his wife. He takes a job as a caregiver to Trevor (Craig Roberts), a disabled 20ish young man who is a handful. His mother has him on a regimented plan of eating waffles for every meal, with only weekly trips to get him out of the house. He is Ben’s first patient, and after some fits and starts, the two form enough of a bond that they persuade Trevor’s mother to allow them to take a road trip. Along the way they encounter a few more folks (Selena Gomez and Megan Ferguson) and Trevor learns that life isn’t just about being a smart-aleck, waffle-eating guy. I found this movie heartwarming and sweet, as the two men recover together from their melancholy and understand that enjoying life is possible. 3½ cans.
75.  The Father* (2021, On Demand) – Best Actor Oscar winner Anthony Hopkins gives a brilliant performance as an aging man suffering from dementia. He’s confused, he can’t remember things he has been told, and he is insistent that he does not need help. He rejects the caregivers hired to assist him by his loyal but exasperated daughter Anne (Olivia Coleman) and tries to charm the latest one by telling her he is a tap dancer. This movie shows the deterioration of the mind from the perspective of the patient, and it is grim. If you have been through this kind of experience with a parent or loved one or expect to, you may not want to face the cruel reality portrayed here. 4 cans for the performances and the sad reality.
76.  Mare of Easttown* (2021, HBO) – There has been more publicity on the authenticity of the Philadelphia/South Jersey accent used here than on the story, and I think that hype has missed the mark. The versatile Kate Winslet plays Mare, a somewhat bedraggled detective on the Easttown police force, a small town where everyone knows everyone and is in each other’s business. When a teenaged girl goes missing and turns up dead, there is no lack of suspects, and Mare is determined to figure out whodunit. Meanwhile, her own life is falling apart. She has a rebellious teenaged daughter, a meddling mother (Jean Smart) and a grandson who she cares for because her son, the child’s father, killed himself. I found it hard to keep track of who was who as well as the plots (there’s more missing teenagers), but the mystery and characters intrigued me enough to sit through all eight episodes.  4 cans.
77.  Friends: The Reunion (2021, HBO Max) – This is the one where they get together after 17 years of being on a break. “Friends” was that ubiquitous show that everyone either watched or knew about when it debuted in 1994. It was a show about six young people living in New York who counted on each other as friends and family. Since they stopped being there for you 17 years ago after a 10-year run, the actors had not been together as a group. This special saw them finally reunited on replicas of their apartments and that famous Central Perk couch to laugh and recall the series that made them (rich) and famous. The women on the show (Courtney Cox, Jennifer Anniston and Lisa Kudrow) say they ate lunch together every day during the show’s run and they remain close friends today. The men (David Schwimmer, Matt LeBlanc and Matthew Perry) also hit it off. Blessed with genius comic timing, great writing and genuine chemistry, these friends felt like our own friends, and seeing them so delighted to be back in each other’s company is testament not only to the concept of the show but to the power of friends. Since 2020 definitely felt like no one’s day, week, month or even our year, this reunion, telecast as the pandemic precautions wind down and allow us to reunite with our own friends, felt just right. 4 cans, and I’m starting to rewatch the series.
78.  Inside the Met* (2021, PBS Documentary Channel; requires subscription) – I would have been fascinated by this three-part series even if it didn’t include what happened to the largest art museum in the Americas during the pandemic.  In 2020, the Metropolitan Museum of Art was scheduled to celebrate its 150th birthday. Plans changed considerably when COVID hit New York hard. The city was locked down and the Museum was shuttered for 6 months. Still, some of the hundreds of employees ventured inside to check on the precious pieces of art, ranging from ancient rugs and classic paintings to statues and clothing. This series does a great job of showing how a museum is run, and I was impressed with the devotion of the people who work there, whether they are engineering the move of a large statue or hanging a painting or restoring a rug. This program will give you a greater appreciation for the treasures of the Met. 3½ cans.
79.  Amazon Empire: The Rise and Reign of Jeff Bezos* (2021, PBS Documentary Channel; requires subscription) – Remember when Amazon sold books?  That was the beginning of an empire imagined by founder Jeff Bezos, who took the online retailer from books to every imaginable product and beyond. Today Bezos owns Whole Foods, The Washington Post and, through Amazon Web Services (AWS), his company runs the cloud computing platform that hosts websites you use every day. Is the company TOO big? Should it be broken up by the government? Will it EVER pay taxes? Between Prime Video, Alexa, Ring Doorbell and so much more, Amazon has infiltrated our daily lives, which some feel threatens our privacy. This documentary praises the business even as it raises questions about its impact on society. From selling books online to becoming the world’s richest man, Bezos’ rise is a fascinating story. 4 cans.

Murder, She Wrote

I have always liked a good mystery, although I have never been good at solving them. When I watched “Mission Impossible" on TV, I was always fooled by the real perpetrator. When I read mystery books, I always go for every red herring, convincing myself of the merits of the case against nearly every character. I never would have been friends with Jessica Fletcher of “Murder She Wrote,” because everyone around her in her small village seemed to suffer a fatal end. But when boredom set in during the quarantine (after about 48 hours) I found myself watching more episodes of real-life murder mysteries than ever, and the supply was bountiful.

Sure, there’s “Colombo” and “Monk” and a zillion other fictional crime dramas, but as Marvin Gaye says, “Ain’t Nothin’ Like the Real Thing.” Besides, you really can’t make up some of this stuff.
You can find something in the crime genre on TV at any time of the day or night. There are “Deadly Vows,” and “Homicide Hunter,” and a plethora of other mysteries that air on the OG crime network, the ID Channel, but ID isn’t the only source. I found one show, “Unsolved Mysteries,” completely unappealing because, as the title says, they never solve the case!

My personal favorite mystery show is “Dateline,” which calls NBC home on Thursday and Friday nights, but you can catch episodes of the series re-airing on ID, on Oprah’s OWN Network, USA, and CNBC – which apparently thinks murder shows are good business.

There is always the case of “whodunit.” You see what looks like the perfect family only to find that the husband or wife has been carrying on a torrid affair that seems way out of character (of course he TOLD the paramour he was divorced and not still married to his high school sweetheart after 36 years). You know this because the friends of the couple get to go on TV and tell you why he never would have poisoned her food or left the hotel where he was staying on a business trip to come home, shoot her, set the house on fire and then calmly return to the hotel and claim he was there all along (oops, forgot about those security cameras, didn’t you?). The friends are always shocked and the families devastated by the loss of their loved ones, and, by the end of the program, the family is sometimes divided in their loyalty to the accused – who may be one of them. Sometimes the friends immediately have that sneaky suspicion that the spouse did it and they set out to solve the case or help the authorities bring the criminal to justice. On a recent show, the adult son grew up with a single father because his father killed his mother but was never charged with the crime. Even when his father was finally convicted of the murder, the son still loved him because he was his only parent.

To me, the worst crimes are the ones where little children are involved. If these are your kids, you probably have just ruined their lives. No 6-year-old should have to take the witness stand to say they heard mommy and daddy yelling right before mommy left the house and never came back. 

And then there are the random crimes, the kidnapping and killing of college students and innocent victims who are murdered and left for dead in a vacant field or thrown into a stream. The worst are the serial killers, who are the scum of the earth. It’s hard to identify the next Ted Bundy, who may just be sitting at the desk beside you.

Sometimes these cases yield no clues for the police to use in tracking down the culprits and they end up in the “cold case file” where they languish indefinitely, unresolved and heartbreaking to the loved ones of the victim. Kudos to the determined, dogged police detectives who are assigned to pursue a case that no one could solve until they looked at it with a set of fresh eyes or who are able to use forensic tools that may not have existed when the crime happened. And thanks to the original investigators who captured and retained evidence just in case it might come in handy decades after the crime was committed.

Having watched so many episodes of these programs and having seen so many different crimes, I can’t help but detect (pun intended) a few themes that run through many of them. Criminals might not be the sharpest knives in the drawer – even though they use those knifes to commit their crimes. So, for all you would-be killers and criminals, here are my observations and advice.

1. You might want to consider just divorcing your spouse rather than killing him/her and depriving your children of a parent – or potentially both parents if you get caught, convicted and sent to prison. And disposing of the body is always a hassle.

2. If you do intend to kill the former love of your life or even a stranger, know that the authorities can easily get your cell phone records, bank transactions and any other information that might be incriminating. They will know where you were by the location of your phone – those sneaky cell towers enable the authorities to pinpoint your location at the time of the murder.

3. If you are making arrangements for a friend or hired killer to do the dastardly deed, it probably isn’t a good idea to call that person 22 times the day before the crime is scheduled to be done (seriously, that was in a recent episode). Coincidence? I think not. Personally, I don’t know anyone well enough to ask them to either kill someone for me or find someone who would. 

4. If you need to research how to poison someone with antifreeze or must search for other lethal alternatives, don’t use your own computer and search from your house, where the authorities can find you from your IP address. Try the old-fashioned way: Go to the library and look up ways to kill someone in a book!

5. If you find the need to buy tarps, large plastic bags, shovels, hunting knives, gloves, rope or a gun – pretty much anything that could potentially be used to kill someone and dispose of a body – don’t go shopping the day before the murder, and certainly DO NOT use your credit card to pay for those items – use CASH! The cops will check your credit card records and see that you charged the knife at Walmart and then they will find the security footage of you in the store making the purchase. In one very notorious case that I read two separate books about, the murderer used his brother’s boat to dump the body in the ocean and shot a hole in the sturdy cooler he bought for disposing of the body to make it sink. Eventually, a fisherman found a cooler floating and it was traced back via a credit card purchase. Sometimes it can be excused as circumstantial evidence, but a good prosecutor will make the jury get past reasonable doubt.

6. Cameras and security devices are EVERYWHERE! Your neighbor’s Ring doorbell footage can spot you loading a large plastic bag with what appears to be a body into the trunk of your car. Banks, parking lots, buildings, gas stations and traffic lights can help find you driving in your own car to put you in the vicinity of the crime scene. I watched one case where the authorities pieced together a trip of several hundred miles by using this kind of footage.

7. If you try to outwit law enforcement by renting a car to get to the crime scene instead of using your own, easily identifiable car, don’t rent it in your own name!

8. If you are trying to get rid of the body, you can’t just throw a tarp over it (see point 5) and dump it in a field near the road. Those pesky joggers always seem to find things that seem amiss and alert the cops. You need to make more of an effort to hide the body.

9. If you are related to the victim by marriage or are a current or former significant other, know that you will almost immediately be considered a person of interest. Once that happens, the cops will be watching how you react and what you do from that point on. Did you sob when you heard the news about the death of your loved one? Did you ask any questions about how it happened? Did you immediately concoct a story that smacks of an alibi? Did you immediately demand an attorney? Did you participate in the community-wide search to look for your missing loved one?

10. You should know that no woman leaves the house without her keys, phone and wallet – unless she is jogging. And she probably didn’t leave scrambled eggs sitting on her plate on the kitchen table, either.

11. If you are taken in for questioning, don’t drink the water. Today there are new methods that didn’t exist years ago to get evidence. There is a burgeoning field of forensic genealogy where DNA can be matched against a database that might include cousins you didn’t know you had and you are identified. The authorities will want a sample of your DNA to tie you to the victim or crime scene and just by taking a sip from the bottle of water they politely offer you are providing it. If you forget that and do take a sip and then wipe off the bottle, rest assured that you have been recorded doing that and you look guilty. Of course, denying them the sample also makes you look guilty.

12. Don’t think you can outwit the lie detector. Chances are you can’t, and even if the results are inadmissible in court, you have cast doubt on yourself and your alibi.

13. Let’s say you are in jail, either awaiting trial or your appeal from the conviction. Remember that the guy you have befriended in the next cell is also there for a reason, so it is not a good idea to “confess” to him about what you did or tried to do. He is neither your attorney nor your priest. More likely, he becomes a snitch and turns you in to get a better deal for himself. And please don’t give him a map of your house so he can kill your wife when he gets out of jail.

I know that everyone is entitled to a good defense, but an attorney who overlooks the obvious guilt of his/her client and turns the tables to make them look like a victim is either evil or a sociopath himself/herself. Just don’t take the case if the person seems guilty despite their denials. Are we really supposed to believe that OJ is still looking for the real murderer or that Scott Peterson’s pregnant wife just left the house on her own? Don’t insult our intelligence.

I’ll admit that I watch too many of these cases and I have read all of the late Ann Rule’s books about hard-to-solve murders or hard-to-get convictions. More often than not, I will watch a "Dateline" on the DVR when I wake up too early and I’m not ready to start my day. I almost always fall asleep in the last 10 minutes, before I learn “whodunit,” but at least I can replay the show on the DVR to see how it ends. The fact that there are so many shows to watch and so many different ways people try to kill each other continues to amaze me. No wonder so many books, movies and crime programs exist. 

Scary, isn’t it?

So, wise up, people, and think about how to resolve your issues in a way that won’t find me watching you on an episode of “Dateline.”

Tina's April 2021 Movies & More

Here we go, movie buffs, with another edition Movies & More. Numbering picks up from the previous month, and movies not seen previously are marked with an asterisk. As always, everything is rated on a scale of 1-5 cans of tuna fish, with 5 being the top.

51.  Sound of Metal* (2020, Prime Video) – Heavy metal/punk drummer Ruben Stone (Riz Ahmed) is surrounded by sound – loud, unrelenting noise that suddenly, tragically, takes away most of his hearing. He is determined to get back into music, and he learns from a doctor about the possibility of having a cochlear transplant to enable him to hear again. He and his girlfriend Lou (Olivia Stone), the singer in their band, live a modest, nomadic life in his Airstream RV, and he doesn’t have the money for the surgery or the ability to adapt to his new, quiet world. Along comes a chance to join a group of former addicts like Ruben where he can peacefully adjust to the world of the deaf, surrounded by people who have recognized their limitations and have learned to lip read and take advantage of talk-to-text technology. But without his music, will Ruben relapse? Or will he accept his new life? Ahmed gives an intense, Oscar-nominated performance as a man desperate for control of his world. 3½ cans.
52.  Hysterical* (2021, FX) – This documentary about female comedians isn’t all that hilarious, though its leads do some mighty funny stand-up performances. But the reality is that they have to fight the patriarchy, so to speak, to even get on the bill at a comedy club when the field is dominated by men. In addition, they have to put up with unwanted and derogatory comments, many sexual in nature, that they are supposed to accept as part of the hazards of their field. Throw in being gay, Black or a person or color, and the odds are really against their success. This harsh reality is tempered by the intelligence of today’s comics as they navigate their way through the odds and give back as much guff as they take. There are many short segments by female comedians going all the way back to the icons – Moms Mabley, Phyllis Diller, Totie Fields and of course, Joan Rivers – all of whom held their own. I salute these women as much for their intelligence and bravery as their humor. Trying to live their dreams in the face of so much going against them is traumatic as well as admirable. 3 cans.
53.  Ted Lasso* (2020, Apple TV+) – Ted Lasso and I have one key thing in common: Neither of us knows much about soccer – called football in England – where the former American football coach is hired to take over a bad club. Ted (Jason Sudeikis) is hired by owner Rebecca (Hannah Waddingham), who initially wants the team to fail to get back at her philandering former husband who relished the team. But Ted, armed with a ton of positive aphorisms, doesn’t need to know the off-side rule to manage a clubhouse of disgruntled players. It’s an odd bunch to be sure. The captain is over the hill and the star player is completely enamored with himself. Can Ted and his pal Coach Beard (Brendan Hunt) bring this team together? Will Rebecca allow them to succeed? This is a 10-part series, but each episode runs only half an hour, so I binged it in a day. Sudeikis brings energy and wry humor to ever-enthusiastic Ted, and the story was much more moving than I expected. 4 soccer balls.
54.  Hemingway* (2021, PBS) – Documentary maker extraordinaire Ken Burns puts his magic touch on this three-part (six-hour) comprehensive look at one of the lions of literature, Ernest Hemingway. Hemingway was larger than life and his heart was always in the characters he wrote about. Burns traces his life from childhood to serving his country in WWI, from adventures in Africa to fishing in Havana. Hemingway lived many of the tales he told and his books were required reading for me in high school and later as an English major at Douglass College. Burns’ painstaking attention to the photos, films, letters and other media that depicted Hemingway made him come alive to the point that I started wondering whether I still have a copy of “The Old Man and the Sea” around here somewhere that I can reread. 4 cans.
55.  Fully Committed* (2021, George Street Playhouse, streaming) – Maulik Pancholy is a whirling dervish in this one-man show about a struggling actor struggling with his day job – taking reservations at a snooty, would-be upscale restaurant. He is subjected to the demands of the obnoxious chef, the pompous people who consider themselves VIPs, demanding reservations at specific tables and outlandish special requests. He also has to contend with the agent who fails to get him acting jobs, his lonely and worried widowed father, the restaurant manager and other staff, and, well, I lost count. Pancholy plays EVERY character, voicing each one suitably for their station in life, and somehow never gets lost or confused. His performance is exhausting – both to the viewer and, I’m sure, to the deft and agile actor. But I have to say that it was nice to experience theater again, even if it was from the comfy confines of my couch. 4 cans.
56.  We Work: Or the Making and Breaking of a $47 Billion Unicorn* (2021, Hulu) – If you liked “The Smartest Guys in the Room” about the rise and fall of Enron, or you found yourself fascinated by Elizabeth Holmes’ audacity in “The Inventor” about the rise and fall of her blood testing start-up Theranos, this documentary is for you. We Work was a company based on the premise of building and leasing attractive office space to young entrepreneurs who would establish a work community where they could bolster each other’s dreams. Co-founder Adam Neuman had enough exuberance and magnetism that he made these people (mostly in their 20s and 30s, and almost exclusively white) believe in his vision of corporate community. In a few years, his company was leasing more space in New York City than any other company. But that wasn’t enough. We Work also wanted to build "We Live," extending the concept of community to tiny apartments with common spaces for occupants to congregate, and even "We Grow," which he and his wife expected to revolutionize education. The private company was initially funded by a giant and life-changing injection of money from Japan’s Soft Bank. But the company was hemorrhaging money even as its valuation grew, and its profits were hard to identify. The people whom Neuman charmed continued to buy in, attended his “We Work” camps where there were lots of games and liquor – what the Frye Festival might have been if it had not been so bungled. When you can’t understand the basics about a company – and its shortcomings were finally revealed in a filing prior to its intention to launch an IPO – you have to wonder what is really there. If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. 4 cans.
57.  Minari* (2021, On Demand) – This movie is all about the American dream, as a Korean couple and their American born children move from California to Arkansas so the father, Jacob, can fulfill his dream of operating a farm, raising Korean vegetables. But it is a lonely existence for the family, where water is scarce, the ground is dry and they are rapidly running out of money. They are strangers in the area, which makes their lives lonely. Meanwhile, Jacob and his wife both work at a chicken harvesting plant, where they have the unenviable job of “sexing,” identifying and separating the males from the females (who are worth more). Her mother (Oscar winner Yuh-jung Youn) comes from Korea to help care for the two children, Anna and David, a six-year-old with a bad heart. This is a quiet, thoughtful film, and not one for people who crave action in their movies. 3½ cans.
58.  7 Yards – The Chris Norton Story* (2020, Netflix) – The documentary features Chris Norton, who was a college freshman football player when he went down hard while attempting to make a tackle. When he wasn’t moving, everyone immediately knew he had suffered a serious injury. It was a spinal cord injury, and few people thought that he would ever be able to move any of his extremities, no less walk or be able to take care of himself again. But with the help of doctors, therapists, his devoted family and legions of teammates and friends, Chris was determined to return to school and walk on stage to receive his diploma. He was determined and willing to do more than called for in therapy. When he did return to school, his teammates and friends willingly took on caretaking duties, not only pushing his wheelchair to class but helping get him up in the morning and to bed at night. I don’t want to ruin this touching documentary, but Chris’ story is remarkable. I could not help but think of Rutgers’ own Eric LeGrand, who suffered a severe spinal cord injury in 2010 on the football field. He has experienced amazing success as a motivational speaker, entrepreneur and is truly the spirit of Rutgers as he continues his journey to recovery. The depth of the human spirit is limitless in some special people. 3 cans.
59.  Why Did You Kill Me?* (2021, Netflix) – This documentary is a cross between the many murder mysteries of the NBC series “Dateline” and the MTV show “Catfish.” A young woman is shot and killed and witnesses place a Ford Expedition at the scene. Was it a gang-related murder or something to do with drugs? The mother and younger sister devise a way to get information the police aren’t able to uncover when they set up a fake social media account for the murdered young woman and lure young men into online relationships with her until they get the clues that police need to solve the case. The title is a question these imposters pose to one of the young men they feel may be responsible for her death. Lesson learned: Don’t fall for what you see about people online. Not everyone is who they appear to be. 3½ cans.
60.  Eye for an Eye* (1996, HBO on Demand) – When Karen McCann’s daughter is raped and murdered by an intruder whose case is dismissed on a technicality, Karen (Sally Field) is out for revenge. The cops can’t do anything about the murderer (Keifer Sutherland) because the evidence was not properly handled, so a frustrated Karen takes matters into her own hands. Through her grief group, she learns there is a way for her to get a gun, and she takes self-defense lessons and learns to shoot. And even though the murderer takes the life of another victim, she seems strangely unafraid that seeking revenge could cost her own life. This movie is suspenseful but very unrealistic to think tiny little Sally Field could take on a killer with nothing much to lose. Good cast (Ed Harris, Joe Mantegna), fair movie. 3 cans.
61.  Nobody’s Fool (1994, Prime Video) – Paul Newman is Sully, a no-nonsense, irascible 60-year-old living in a New England town (where snow perpetually crunches under his boots) where he knows everyone and gets away with more than he should. His bum knee – for which he is suing the construction company that occasionally employs him – keeps him from doing some of the things he is used to doing, but he still finds time to play poker with the guys and hang out at the local bar. His ex-wife is still in town, but he has no real relationship with his grown son and has never met his grandson. Everyone seems to want Sully to be more conventional, to stop stealing the brand-new snowblower that belongs to his boss (Bruce Willis, perfectly smirky in his role), to refrain from trying to run down the police officer (Philip Seymour Hoffman) and to stop flirting with the uber-attractive wife (Melanie Griffiths) of his boss. He has to reconcile with the fact that he has a grown son who has problems of his own and build a relationship with him. He has a soft side, taking care of the elderly landlady (Jessica Tandy) who used to be his teacher (no one ever seems to leave that town). Newman is a master of understatement and is totally believable as an outrageous but lovable scoundrel. His character here reminded me a bit of the more comic hockey coach he played in “Slap Shot.” I love a movie filled with quirky characters and warmth, and this one fits the bill. 4 cans.
62.  Harry & Son (1984) – If you want to see Paul Newman in a movie about a father and a son, watch “Nobody’s Fool” instead of this one. Here Newman is Harry, father to Howard (Robby Benson), a sweet but unambitious 20ish year old who wants to be a writer and surf. Harry wears a hard hat and knocks down buildings for a living, so father and son, despite sharing a house alone since the matriarch of the family died a few years back, share little else. When Harry starts getting headaches and has vision troubles, he loses his job, so neither of them is working and that just ratchets up the tension between them. Howie, a car detailer when he works at all, gets other jobs and quits them in a day. The story here is overburdened by a preponderance of characters – Harry’s brother; his late wife’s best friend (real-life wife Joanne Woodward) who runs a plant shop and would like to get something growing with Harry; Howie’s former girlfriend (a very young Ellen Barkin), whose baby he delivers in a taxi (although it is not his – taxi or baby); a car repo guy; a nymphomaniac, etc. This movie would have benefitted from a smaller cast and a more focused story. But Newman’s face on the screen makes me smile, and Benson’s Howie is adorable, with big puppy dog eyes. 3 cans.
63.  The United States Vs. Billie Holliday* (2021, Hulu) – Singer Andra Day makes an auspicious movie debut playing jazz singer Billie Holliday in this story of the Feds persecuting the songstress for her insistence on performing her controversial song “Strange Fruit.” The song is about the lynching of Black men in the South, men who could be found hanging from trees like some kind of strange fruit. Holliday was a brilliant artist and a determined woman, but she was also hooked on heroin, which gave Harry Anslinger (Garret Hedlund), the chief of the Bureau of Narcotics, an excuse to go after her. Clearly a White supremacist, he was offended by jazz music that he considered “from the jungle” and didn’t hesitate bending the rules by planting drugs on Holliday to drag her into custody. Andra Day portrays hard-drinking, sexually promiscuous Holliday as a strong woman with weaknesses who becomes a real victim of the government. This is not an easy movie to watch, but I was impressed by Day and want to see what else lies ahead for her movie career. She’s off to a good start with an Oscar nomination in her first film. 3½ cans and a warning about lots of drug use, nudity and violence.
64.  Red Joan* (2018, Hulu) – It only took me three years to finish watching this movie. I started it at the movies – you know, those big places where you sit in the dark munching popcorn and view moving images on a large screen – but I fell asleep. I missed enough of the movie that, when it resumed, I had no idea what was going on. I think I left the theater at that point. So, three years later, I managed to stay awake to watch Judi Dench as an elderly English woman who is arrested at her home on charges of having provided classified information on the atomic bomb to Russia during WWII. The movie, based on an actual case, shows young Joan (well-played by Sophie Cookson) drawn into a group of committed young Communists while studying physics. She falls for the erstwhile leader, Leo (Tom Hughes), convinced that he really wants to save the world. Her work makes it easy for her to understand the science and her “friends” persuade her (coerce would be too strong a word) to help the cause by providing documents. In the present time, she is questioned by the authorities about her suspected treason and we follow as she peels back the onion, revealing her involvement that was previously unknown even to her grown son. This movie is intriguing but not compelling, but Dench, as always, makes you believe she IS the character, with a cross of espionage and innocence. 3½ cans.

More Monthly Meanderings

I’m fully vaccinated now, so you should feel completely safe while reading this blog post.

We have now marked the one-year anniversary of COVID, or the point in time when I started counting off squares of toilet paper. The shortages seem to be over, but I can’t break the habit. I haven’t run out of toilet paper yet, by the way. Last year’s conversations centered around the availability of toilet paper. This year’s focus is on the whether people have had their vaccine shots yet.

I seldom have a conversation these days without asking the question, “So, how did it go?” This could refer to a doctor’s appointment, trying to get a doctor’s appointment, getting an appointment for the vaccine, or actually getting the vaccine. What will we talk about when this is behind us? I’m pretty much all out small talk these days.

I think of all events prior to 2020 as BC – Before Covid.

If you lose your lucky penny, I think it is safe to assume it wasn’t so lucky after all.

These days when I get up from a chair or walk down the stairs I sound and look more and more like Amos McCoy. Raise your hand if you know that reference.

The day you see my image on social media as one of those cutesy emojis that are supposed to look like me, you will know that I have been kidnapped and am being forced to use social media to assure people that I am OK but please know that I am not.

I start most Zoom sessions thinking about how much better my hair looked on the previous day – when I didn’t have any Zoom sessions.

Think of how many trees we could save each year if CVS cut the size of their receipts by half.

I was about five minutes away from having my pierced ears close up when I finally put earrings in last week.

Something to ponder – when did the first World War start being called World War I? It’s not like anyone knew there would be a World War II, so no one could have stuck that Roman numeral after it until at least WWII started, right? OK, I looked it up (thank you, Google) and learned the following: “The term ‘World War I’ was coined by Time magazine on page 28b of its June 12, 1939 issue. In the same article, on page 32, the term ‘World War II’ was first used speculatively to describe the upcoming war. The first use for the actual war came in its issue of September 11, 1939.”

I watched “American Idol” as the judges started eliminating contestants to get down to the top 24. At the rate they were keeping people, it looked more like the top 40 than 24!

I bought a new kind of shower cleaner under the brand name “Simply Great.” It wasn’t.

Good news!  After a day being missing in action, my hairbrush magically reappeared, having tried to escape by clinging to the inside of my somewhat loopy bath towel. It was removed safely and I treated it to a spa day, plucking the gray hairs from its bristles and letting it rest in a warm bath to cleanse and rejuvenate it. All is well! Mystery solved. I thought this might be a Dateline story.

Amid all of the rampant unemployment in this country, there are plenty of people like “Dan” or “Rachel” who remain employed to call us incessantly to remind us that our car warranties have or are about to expire or that we have unpaid student loans – 50 years after graduation.

Why do we pronounce licorice as LICK-OR-ISH?

As we passed Easter, I thought of all of the times my co-workers and I grabbed a handful of jellybeans from the candy dish on Judy’s desk. And I cringed.

Speaking of which, I cannot imagine blowing out the candles on a birthday cake ever again. Germ City!

Sometimes I look at the clothes in my closet and wonder, “What could I have been thinking?”

I have had a problem telling the difference between black and blue clothes for a long time. Today I am wearing a plaid top that might be green and black or might be green and blue. I’m wearing it with black pants. I hope people in ShopRite don’t think it is blue and start talking about me behind my back. 

Before my recent doctor appointment, I pondered what to wear, wondering if the top I had in my hand was one I wore last time I went to the doctor. And then I realized that literally NO ONE CARES what I wear to the doctor’s office and wouldn’t remember if I showed up in the same outfit every time.

Of all the things I have lost in the last year, the one that I miss the most is my seamstress. That woman could knock off a hem while I ran errands. She was quick, efficient, cheap and available. She retired right before the pandemic, and there’s a void in my life that no local dry cleaner will fill.

If I give too many people a piece of my mind, will there be anything left?

I’m trying to decide which I like doing less – peeling oranges or peeling hard boiled eggs. I just bought yet another new gadget, one specifically designed to use in peeling an orange. I haven’t tried it yet but stay tuned.

I wonder why the words influenza and influential are so similar.

I owned an HP printer for 5 years and just as I figured out how to scan documents, it died. I watched a video of how to repair or replace the printhead, which I was never able to find, and when I read the comments from one viewer who said he didn’t have either the special screwdriver needed or the blood pressure medication required to do the fix himself, I ordered a new printer. I hope it doesn’t take me five years to figure out the scanning feature on this one!

You know what gets me motivated to run? When I hear that loud noise coming from the laundry room that sounds like the washing machine is blasting off, then I RUN into the laundry room before it takes off.

On the second day of March, I left Somerset County for the first time since June 12, 2020. And I filled the car up at the gas station for the first time since December. When I say that I go nowhere, believe me!

Why do we always find the typos AFTER the email went out or the Facebook post is published?

I’m old enough to remember when Jimmy Dean was a country singer and not a purveyor of breakfast sausages.

When I am putting a burger on a hamburger roll or a fried egg on a bagel, I MUST put it on the bottom of the roll or bagel. And when the bottom starts getting smaller than the top, I just can‘t seem to flip it over and eat it upside down. Just another idiosyncrasy!

You don’t realize how long 2 minutes is until you are brushing your teeth with an electric toothbrush that vibrates after 2 minutes to let you know you’re done. That 2 minutes seems like an hour.

My parents were heavily influenced by having lived through the Depression. Their values came from gratitude for surviving a time of economic uncertainty, poverty and austerity and they taught me the importance of self-sufficiency and hard work. I wonder what lessons will be conveyed to the children and grandchildren of those people who survived life in the time of COVID and whether that next generation will appreciate what they have as much as I do.

 

Tina's March 2021 Movies & More

It's March, so of course I had to reflect March Madness with my selection of several basketball-themed movies. Numbering picks up from previous months and programs marked with an asterisk are ones I had not seen before. Movies are rated on a scale of 1-5 cans of tuna; or, this month, paint cans, gold records and crowns. 

34.  The Vanished* (2020, Netflix) – Paul and Wendy (Thomas Jane and Anne Heche) drive their RV to a campground to have a family vacation with their 10-year-old daughter Taylor. As Paul prepares the fishing gear while Wendy is away from the camper, Taylor suddenly disappears. They look frantically around the grounds and call the local police. Sherriff Baker (Jason Patric, who directed but who seems to sleepwalk through his part) assures them he has never lost a child. But this campground is rife with suspects. The owner is far from friendly, the maintenance guy is a meth-smoking ne’er-do-well and the people in the adjacent campsite seem somehow involved. This is a creepy movie with lots of red herrings and a plot twist you could not anticipate. There was plenty of suspense and many times I wanted to tell the characters, “Don’t go in there!” 3 cans.
35.  Coming to America (1988) – Pampered Prince Akeem (Eddie Murphy) is living the good life in Zamunda, a small country in Africa, surrounded by servants and women who toss rose petals everywhere he walks. But when he is commanded to marry a beautiful woman chosen for him, he balks and decides to go to America to seek a bride who will love him for himself and not for his riches. He and best friend/servant Semmi (Arsenio Hall) land in Queens, New York, of course, where he eschews royal life and starts working in a McDowell’s hamburger joint owned by Mr. McDowell (John Amos). The Prince happily mops the floor and lives in a dump, and he soon develops an interest in the boss’s beautiful and unpretentious daughter (Shari Headley). Murphy and Hall play a bunch of characters who hang around a barbershop and take on all of their roles with great energy and enthusiasm. Will Akeem find the right woman to return home and be his princess bride, ready to one day become King and Queen? Murphy is extremely likeable and gives the movie its charm and innocence. And including a brief scene with Randolph and Mortimer Duke (Ralph Bellamy and Don Ameche) from my favorite Eddie Murphy movie, “Trading Places,” won me over! 3½ cans.
36.  The Real Founder* (2018, Prime Video) – If you watched the Michael Keaton movie “The Founder” about McDonald’s leader Ray Kroc a few years ago, you might want to check out this documentary about the REAL founders – the McDonald brothers. The movie bogs itself down a bit by talking more about itself than the founders, but when Dick McDonald recalls how many times he and his brother failed in other businesses before they finally made a success out of a modest hamburger stand, it makes the movie worth seeing. I’m not a fan of Big Macs, but my mouth was watering watching this one. 3 cans and a side of fries.
37.  Basketball County – In the Water* (2020, Showtime) – I always thought of NYC’s Rucker Park as the epicenter of amateur basketball, but I stand corrected. It is really Prince George County, Maryland, a stone’s throw (or a long pass) from DC and the home of such basketball luminaries as Kevin Durant, Michael Beasley, Quinn Cook, Nolan Smith, Marissa Coleman and many more. The prominence of the area included highly successful AAU teams and the DeMatha High team led by the legendary coach Morgan Wooten. Basketball kept the kids off the streets, playing dawn to dusk first at outdoor playgrounds and then in plenty of rec centers. Numerous NBA, WNBA and major college basketball players call this place home. The movie addresses the socio-economic issues and the dedication of the adults who rescued kids through the sport. 3½ cans.
38.  Perfect in ’76* (1917, Showtime) – After losing just one game in 1975, Indiana men’s basketball Coach Bobby Knight declared that his 1976 team would not only win the National Championship but also go undefeated. I hope I don’t spoil it by telling you that they did. I personally dislike Knight for his abuse of his players, his volatile temper and his overall nastiness, but the man could coach. Whether it was faith or fear he instilled in his players, he got the results he demanded. The documentary traces the season and has plenty of interviews with the players. It was one shining moment for the Hoosiers, a perfect season. 3½ cans.
39.  Allen v. Farrow* (2021, HBO) – I’m not saying you should believe Dylan Farrow, the adopted daughter of Woody Allen and his former leading lady on and off the screen, Mia Farrow, when Dylan says Allen sexually assaulted and abused her – even though her story today is consistent with the story she told as a 7-year-old. I believe her. I’m not saying you should never again watch one of his movies (I stopped several years ago when Dylan told her story as an adult). I’m not saying that Allen should not have had an affair with Farrow’s adopted daughter Soon-Yi, who was underage when the trysts began. This sad, disturbing, emotional and engrossing documentary shows once again the seedy side of money, power and influence (Allen told Farrow she’d never work again if she made these charges against him and he did everything he could to paint her as a vindictive, scorned woman). Please don’t presume his innocence because no charges were brought against him by a prosecutor who found them credible but declined to pursue the case out of concern for the further trauma it might inflict on the young child. Whatever conclusion you draw, this much is clear: Allen is a scumbag of the highest order. Once he knew no charges would be filed against him, he sued Farrow for custody – full custody – and ultimately was denied, but not until his outrageous charges against Farrow as an unfit mother ruined her career and credibility. I cannot separate the artist from this vile man, and because this is a case involving an adult whose own movies show him with plenty of sexual issues. I believe he was justly accused and used his clout and power to weasel out of charges against him. I find him repugnant. Not everyone could get through this 3-part series, but I just could not turn away. 4 cans.
40.  Last Chance U – Basketball* (2021, Netflix) – The Last Chance U franchise switches from 4 seasons covering juco football to featuring basketball this time around, and I found this version superior to the other installments. These community or junior colleges field teams that provide the promise of a possible scholarship to 4-year colleges where the athletes can play ball – if their teams do well. Here, Coach John Mosely is a dedicated man of faith, pushing his athletes hard. Some can’t make it academically while others have family problems and have had their high hopes shattered. The whole series is both hopeful and hopeless, as the players keep their eyes on the prize but don’t always help themselves. It is also an indictment of a society where young men only see the option of becoming a professional athlete, a reality that will escape the vast majority of them, instead of preparing themselves for broader opportunities that graduation from a two-year college might provide for them. This is an 8-part series, so if you can take the time, see for yourself. 4 basketballs.
41.  Kobe Bryant: Muse* (2015, Showtime) – Watching this documentary by and about Kobe Bryant was bittersweet. The film is his life story, from living in Europe with his parents, including his professional basketball player Joe, to returning home, graduating from high school and going straight to the NBA. The film mercifully ends five years prior to the fatal helicopter crash that took the life of Bryant, his daughter and seven others. And despite what seemed like a charmed life for the rich, good-looking and supremely gifted Kobe, the film deals tangentially with problems in his marriage and the tribulations of growing up. If you are a basketball fan, you will want to relive the highlights and sympathize with the injuries and comebacks. 3½ cans.
42. Audrey* (2020, Netflix) – Audrey Hepburn is synonymous with elegance, grace and style. Movie directors wanted to work with her. Top designers wanted to dress her. The camera loved her. But her life was not always a good one, starting with the father’s desertion of the family when Audrey was a child. She and her mother lived in the Netherlands while under Nazi rule. She was educated in Europe, discovered by author Collette, and enjoyed a career in such memorable movies as “Funny Face,” “Roman Holiday,” “Sabrina,” the iconic “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” and “My Fair Lady.” This documentary includes plenty of interviews with people who knew her and reflected on her life, her work and her marriages. Audrey had a fascinating life full of both love and disappointments, and she left behind a catalog of work that even today distinguishes her from other actresses of her time. 4 cans.
43.  Operation Varsity Blues: The College Admissions Scandal* (2020, Netflix) – Unless you have been living under a rock, you probably have heard the story told in this docudrama about wealthy parents paying a so-called admissions coach, Rick Singer, to get their kids into college. Using real taped conversations but delivered by actors, the story unfolds as the brazen Singer steers high school students (and their parents; mostly their parents) to colleges as athletes or with other credentials they clearly don’t have. Wealthy parents, eager to get their kids certain schools, made sizable donations to his foundation, which funneled the money to the schools as part of their athletics departments. It didn’t matter that the kids didn’t play the sports they listed on their applications; doctored photos of them in volleyball or water polo uniforms made it look realistic. Some athletic departments, coaches and administrations were happy to take the money. When the parents questioned Singer’s tactics – having an adult take tests for their child, as an example – they were assured that this step would ensure admission. The whole thing came crashing down, along with some famous Hollywood names ended up with very brief prison sentences. In most cases, the kids did not know the strings their parents were pulling behind the scenes to gain them admission, and how humiliated they might be by parents who lacked trust in their ability to be get into the likes of Harvard, Stanford and USC on their own merits. 3 cans and no diplomas.
44.  The Last Blockbuster* (2020, Netflix) – You will have to go to Bend, Oregon, to find it, but the last remaining Blockbuster video rental store is still there. Contrary to popular view, it was not solely the rise of streaming services like Netflix that proved the undoing of the once ubiquitous chain. This documentary explains the business reasons behind the eventual failure, but it is the cultural reminiscence that provides the charm here. The store in Bend is managed by the warm Sandy Harding, and she treats the employees and customers like her extended family. Remember going into Blockbuster to pick out a movie for the night? The experience of searching multiple screens on Netflix is just not the same. 3½ cans.
45.  The Day Sports Stood Still* (2021, HBO) – Actually, this documentary is not restricted to a 24-hour period, as it only begins with the time last March when the NBA shut down its season, the NCAA Tournament was canceled and every other sport this side of cornhole was affected. Here we get to see players like respected basketball veteran Chris Paul as they navigate the health and safety issues at the beginning of the pandemic and the fallout from the George Floyd and Brianna Taylor deaths that helped spur athletes to speak up about racial injustice. But they are also shown as humans, as the NBA players agree to go into a “bubble” in Florida to resume the NBA season, giving up the ability to see their families for months and using that opportunity to address social justice issues that are acutely felt in leagues where the vast majority of players are Black. This documentary does a great job of addressing the events of the time and the players’ reactions as professionals and human beings who worry about their health and the well-being of their families. 3½ cans.
46.  Coming 2 America* (2021, Prime Video) – Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall return to Zamunda (and Queens, NY) as Murphy’s Prince Akeem ascends to the throne following the death of his father, the king. Murphy and the wife he went to America to find in the original have three lovely daughters but no sons – and thus, no heir to the throne. But his sidekick Semmi confesses that while they were in Queens 30 years ago, Akeem had a drunken tryst with a woman who fathered his only son, so they go back to America to claim Lavelle and bring him to Zamunda to claim his rightful place as a prince. The plot is immaterial in this self-indulgent romp. More important to Murphy & Co is cramming in star cameos and as many characters as they themselves can portray. The result is a sometimes funny but more often sloppy mess of a movie, enriched less by genuine humor and more by the portrayal of life in Zamunda, the rich costumes and the uproarious Leslie Jones as Akeem’s baby mama from Queens. She steals the show. If the gang comes back to America next time, I’ll watch Murphy’s much superior “Trading Places” instead. 3 cans.
47.  TINA* (2021, HBO) – The last name isn’t necessary to tell the story of the whirling dervish that is Tina Turner on stage. By now, most people know her story – singing in the church, singing with Ike Turner, becoming a huge star only to lose everything but her name when she fought back and abandoned her abusive husband after years of domestic abuse and violence. This is a courageous woman who did what she felt she had to do to survive, who resurrected her career with the help of the loyal Roger Davies and became a huge star. But no matter how high her star ascended, someone was always there to ask her about Ike – were they still married, what happened between them, is the love still there? There was no escape from her past. Here she tells her story on her own terms, and probably for the last time, as she prepares to live out her life with a husband who adores her in the peace and tranquility of her Swiss home. So, watch this movie to know more about her career, to enjoy her performances, to stand in awe of her explosive talent and to appreciate her strength and resilience. Tina is simply the best! 4½ cans.
48.  Genius: Aretha* (2021, National Geographic Channel) – How fitting to watch the story of Aretha Franklin right after seeing the HBO documentary on Tina Turner, two musical legends of epic proportions. The Aretha story is an eight-part drama starring Cynthia Errivo, who has plenty of presence and power to not be totally overtaken by Aretha. The story traces Aretha as a child who loses her mother early and is, with her sisters, dominated by her preacher father, a philanderer who wants to control Aretha’s career from the time she is a child singing on the Gospel Circuit to her award-winning career. Her desire to control her own destiny, select her own songs and get credit as a producer on her albums is at least in part because of her father’s selfish need to control her. It seems to me that all Aretha really wanted was R E S P E C T. And she deserved it. 4 gold records. PS – I’m still trying to figure out what this show was doing on the National Geographic Channel!
49.  Made You Look* (2020, Netflix) – The subtitle of this documentary is, “The true story about fake art,” and that sums it up perfectly. You don’t have to know anything about the world of art buying, selling, authenticating works and collecting them to be fascinated by this documentary. But despite being uneducated about the commercial aspects of art, I think I would have questioned the veracity of a woman unknown in the art world who showed up in a prestigious gallery with the promise of a bunch of paintings by well-known modern artists such as Mark Rothko and Jackson Pollack. She offered to sell them to Ann Freedman, a dealer with a great reputation and directo of the Knoedler Gallery in New York.  Authenticating the work of known artists seems to be a hit-or-miss proposition, and Freedman claimed to follow all the protocols. But were these real works of art? Or did a former math professor in Queens, NY, reproduce them, thus rendering them worthless phonies? Following this case are lawyers, journalists and countless others in the art world, and the people who paid millions for works eventually considered fakes were not amused. If you are talented enough as a painter to mimic the works of others, why not just create your own? The art here might be fake, but the movie is very real. 4 cans of paint.
50.  Elizabeth & Margaret – Love and Loyalty* (2021, Netflix) – I never got around to finishing “The Crown,” so this will have to be my royal flush for the month. I know it is hard to take pity on members of the royal family, and Elizabeth and Margaret led privileged but sheltered lives.  When their father suddenly died, Elizabeth became the Queen. She was torn between her loyalty to the Crown and her love for her free-wheeling (by royal standards) sister, who was ready to marry a married man before she turned 25. Heavy is the head that wears the crown, as the Queen had to dissuade her sister from continuing the romance. It appears that Margaret had a lot more fun than her elder sibling, but the two overcame their different lives and stayed close. If you are really into the royals, this one’s for you. 3 crowns.