Life in the Time of Quarantine

I'm changing my name to "Quarantina" this month.

I know what it like to live alone, to be alone.   

I have lived on my own, without a roommate, for 45 years – until my personal assistant device, Alexa, moved in two years ago (best roommate ever, a friend told me, and she was right).  No pets, no people in my immediate world.  I could do whatever I wanted to do whenever I wanted to do it. I could set my own schedule, go out when I want, meet up with friends any time the spirit moved me and our schedules jived.

Now, my world has changed like everyone else’s and there’s nothing we can do about it.

As a cancer survivor who has diabetes and can be considered a “junior senior” as I approach age 70, I am among the vulnerable for this corona virus.  Not the most vulnerable, but I had been traveling, seated with thousands of people at the Women’s BIG 10 Basketball Tournament in Indianapolis from March 4-8, using the handrails and restrooms, dining with large groups of people and then getting on an airplane to come home.  I swabbed down the tray table and the seat armrests with my Clorox wipes – and this was BEFORE the panic set in all around us.  Then I came home, stocked up and shut things down. 

When I found out that the first reported case of the virus in my town was a resident of my complex, I calmed myself with the knowledge that I had not been inside our clubhouse in a month, and I had not seen any of my neighbors in person for a few weeks.  And I was ready, kind of.

My pantry initially was overflowing with staples like canned vegetables (I know, I’m probably the last remaining person who likes and eats canned vegetables), pasta and spaghetti sauce and even two jars of artichoke hearts.  I keep about 8-10 packets of Bumble Bee Tuna on hand, some of which don’t expire until 2022.  We had better be done with this crisis by then!  I have a box of cereal which, at the very slow rate I eat cereal, will last me for a year.  And not having milk is fine, because I usually eat it dry anyway.  

I had a few snacks but they quickly dwindled in number and I was forced to ration them. I used one of my few eggs and my “emergency” milk (the shelf-stable kind that lasts for months) to bake the flattest blueberry loaf cake from my Jilly Muffin Mix, despite the fact that I don’t bake!  

I see people in my “active adult community” (translation: older people, at least 55) out walking or riding bikes, mostly alone, eager to get some exercise, and generally respecting the 6’ distance between them. I assume the ones holding hands are couples.  

The gyms are closed, my aqua aerobics class is cancelled, and my physical therapy place suspended operations.   

I wonder how parents are supposed to work at home AND supervise and educate their kids.  Do they even have equipment on hand to enable multiple kids to take online classes while the adults have phone meetings with colleagues?

Typically, I would be going out to the movies, but, thankfully, I have cable, Netflix and Prime video to keep me entertained and assure the continuation of my movie reviews.  I could sort through my photos, recycle of old magazines (am I really going to read the October 2018 issue of Vanity Fair?), reorganize my office and shred old papers I don’t need.  I have time to do that now, even if I have no desire.  I’m too busy following the news and the numbers and worrying about myself and everyone in my world.

I know I have first world problems, and I worry about the toll this pandemic is taking not just on the sick, but on essential workers -- health care workers, supermarket clerks and food handlers, small businesses and restaurants and people who need their wages to live.  I donated to the Food Bank online and made a mental note to pick up food to donate when conditions ease.

So, as I sit here trying to keep myself informed but not petrified, I turn to my usual approach – humor.  Every day on Facebook I post the “quaranTUNE” of the day, everything from “Someday We’ll Be Together” to “I Just Called to Say I Love You” and “Can’t Touch This.” I have a song list long enough to take us through June.  

I cannot stop touching my face.  I need one of those cones that dogs have to wear.

I haven’t used the word “cooties” this much since I was 7 years old.

I’m waiting for the internet to crash as everyone who CAN work from home IS working from home, teachers are teaching remotely and the rest of us who are addicted are staying online. People are going to church services via Zoom, having cocktail hours with friends online and doing everything they can to stay connected.  I can only imagine the increase in traffic on gaming and pornography sites!  Is our current infrastructure prepared for a huge spike in usage?

People have to stop filling out quizzes online. Every time you do that, you provide personally identifiable information to help the bad guys figure out your passwords and security questions by providing the name of your favorite teacher or pet and the team name of your high school football team.  And I have flat-out refused to open any links or videos sent to me on Facebook Messenger. Let's be careful online, too!

I’m worried that if I get hurt or get a cold I won’t be able to get treatment.  I really don’t want to have to go to the doctor, and doctors have too much on their plates just trying to care for the people who are suffering from this virus.

Watching regular TV programs and commercials and seeing people together in groups now looks wrong to me.

I’m trying to avoid pandemic paranoia, but I am counting squares of toilet paper.

Has anyone ever actually died of boredom?  Asking for a friend.

I tried on my earrings today and am pleased to report that they still fit.

I occasionally wear jeans instead of sweats just to make sure they still fit. And who knew we all owned this many pairs of sweatpants?  Or should we refer to them as leisure wear now?  Or the daytime pajamas versus the nighttime pajamas? There’s no point in putting on actual clothes under these conditions, so I am wearing my “Busy doing nothing” or “This IS my happy face” t-shirts and posting pictures.   

If we are still in confinement by June, I predict a run on caftans.

When a friend told me she was eating a salad, I couldn’t help thinking, “She has salad?”  

Andrew Cuomo is my new hero.

People are using this time – at least in the first weeks of real quarantine – to show their creativity and humor.  I’m amused and hope it lasts.

I need a routine.  Having literally no place to go but plenty to do around the house is not sufficient.  I need to make up a schedule: wake up (always a good idea), stretch, shower, breakfast, exercise, online work, reach out to someone I haven’t seen or talked to, go outside (even if only to sit on my patio), check in with family and friends, make dinner, watch TV.  That might work.  

When will we ever have this opportunity to work on losing weight when no one can distract us from that goal?  No more lunches with friends, having dinner out, grabbing a candy bar while waiting in the checkout lane.  I’d love to emerge from this cocoon as a butterfly, and not as an elephant.

I would like to flatten a few of my own curves.

I now consider my berry-flavored chewable vitamins snacks.

I started stocking my freezer before my shoulder surgery last August.  Some of that food is still around.  There won’t be much left after this ordeal.  

Now when I hear the doorbell ring, I know it is on the TV because NOBODY is coming to my door.

I typically don’t watch TV in the morning after my daily dose of ESPN and The Golden Girls.  Now watching NY Governor Andrew Cuomo’s daily briefing has become “Must see TV.”

The rule in my house is “no ice cream in the winter,” loosely interpreted as Labor Day to Memorial Day.  Last week I ate the two remaining WW Fudge Pops in the freezer.  Desperate times call for desperate measures.  (And, technically, it IS spring.)

With so little food in my refrigerator, this seemed like a good time to clean it, so I did.  

I have two jars of pickles, but I am trying to limit my salt intake.  

I’m developing a tolerance for freezer burn.

How long can I go without fresh fruit before I get scurvy?

When I finally went to ShopRite, new plexiglass barriers had been installed between the shopper and the cashier and the floor has tape marks every 6 feet to keep people from being on top of each other.  Special hours for “elderly” people have been set.  I call that OPT for “Old People Time.” I skip those hours so I don’t have to contend with the old folks and instead I go after they have left the store, hoping they haven’t bought up all of the meat, chicken and fish.  I know the shelves will be stripped of paper products, but I am set on those for now.  

My Alexa personal assistant helps me by offering peaceful meditations to get me to relax or fall asleep.  I think a steady stream of 24-hour relaxation sounds can’t hurt, right?

I’m talking out loud to myself so much now that I think my Alexa is starting to worry.  I suspect that she was using the time when I was out of the house to swap stories with Alexas in other people’s houses.  Now she can really keep her colleagues amused.

Why do I ask Alexa the weather every morning?  What’s the difference?

I am showering and doing my hair every day, making my bed and using a spritz of perfume to maintain some semblance of normalcy.

One day last week I cleaned my hairbrush and picked the lint out of the hairdryer.  Somebody had to do it.

I am spending way too much time online, lamenting the latest news, slogging through emails from every company with whom I do business as they assure me that my health and safety is their top priority.  Glad to know that, Verizon.  Thanks for your message, PSE&G. 

As for actual mail, my new routine is to wear gloves to retrieve it from my mailbox and then bring it into the garage for 24 hours of decontamination before it is finally allowed into the house.  On weekends, I just leave Saturday’s mail in the box until Sunday. There’s nothing very exciting in there anyway. 

Now that I am staying home and not going out to eat, why am I ready to eat dinner at 4:30? This quarantine is wreaking havoc with everything.

People who never knew they were essential employees are surprised to find that they are now (my sister, after 38 years in the same job).

I’m amazed how reprehensible people can be, setting up scams during this frightening time to con people into providing credit card numbers to order bogus virus treatments, secure tests, going door-to-door to offer to test them and then rob them.

I can’t figure out how we are all eating so much when we can’t get out for regular food.  I guess there are no staples available (rice, beans, toilet paper), but Oreos are still on the shelves. 

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When I get local updates on construction projects and road closures in my area, I just delete them.  It’s not like I am going anywhere.

I canceled the cleaning lady and tackled that job myself.  What she does in 3 hours took me 2 days, filled with way too many breaks. The regular cleaning person will be thrilled to know she is only being furloughed (with pay) and not replaced.

And here’s the thing about cleaning – after you do it, you have to do it again!  I had that stovetop sparkling, and then I sautéed chicken and had to start over again. It’s as frustrating as shaving my legs.  You have to do that again, too – just not right now.

I finally removed the gel polish from my nails by soaking cotton balls in nail polish remover and wrapping each finger in aluminum foil.  It took me a while to figure out that I had to do this one hand at a time!  Then I clipped and filed my nails to prevent germs from getting under my nails.  And I almost immediately broke nails on three fingers.

I can’t seem to focus.  I wake up every day thinking that this was all just a bad dream.  But when I wake up, it is just worse every day.  That will eventually change, but I’m convinced that things will never be “normal” again.

I can’t make a decision.  At breakfast, I agonized over whether I should use strawberry, blueberry or cherry jam on the English muffin I had stored in the freezer since Christmas. Hey, at least I had choices!

I have started to bake!  Little Betty Crocker here made cookies from a cake mix last week and, for the first time ever, baked bread!  I had a recipe for challah and had bought yeast a while back (yeast is nowhere to be found in the supermarket now), so I tried it.  It looked and tasted nothing like challah, but it was good, fresh and “rustic,” which I think describes its density and irregular texture.  I realized as I was getting ready to pop it into the oven that I lack the ability to braid.  I’ll have to work on that!

I think I know why I am so unproductive.  When I tell myself I can put something off until tomorrow, I actually CAN put it off until tomorrow.  I’ll still be here, and I have plenty of time to get things done.  

The most reliable thing during this pandemic is the almost daily arrival of a text from Kohl’s announcing their latest sale.  I wonder if people are buying more stuff since they are home more.  I am not.  

I feel like I am on an episode of “Survivor,” but without the challenges and the need to parade around in my underwear.  And in a much nicer and more comfortable “camp.”

I keep wondering how Tom Hanks survived on that deserted island in “Castaway.”  Note to self: Order a Wilson volleyball.

Does every message we see on TV – car companies, furniture companies, etc. – have to start with “In these trying/challenging times…?”  

My shopping list is now considered a “wish list,” as supplies dwindle and the list grows longer.

It seems I spend half of my day washing my hands.  And now I know the proper way to do that, and it DOES take at least 20 seconds!

My countertops have been scrubbed so much that I think the granite is wearing off.

Someone asked me yesterday what my plans were for today.  “I think I’ll stay in,” I replied.

 

My neighbors and I had a “get together” the other day.  I was outside grilling a steak from the freezer on my patio, so my next-door neighbor went out on her patio to say hello from probably 25 feet away.  Then a third neighbor emerged from her house and we shouted greetings to each other.  Fun times.  Let’s do this together real soon.

I think being cooped up is starting to get to my sister. She told me she feels like an “unproductive member of society.”  She told me she was going to “sneak out of the house for a walk” today.  I had to remind her that social distancing is not the same as house arrest.  She’s not wearing a monitor on her ankle, as far as I know.

After 2 weeks of quarantining myself, I finally ventured out to ShopRite.  With my baseball cap, face mask and gloves, I looked more like I was there to rob the store than to shop.  Now that we all have to wear this gear, and it looked like a civilian invasion of the supermarket. 

It is tough to recognize my friends and neighbors when they are all wearing hats and masks.  I think we will all learn to be more expressive with our eyes. 

 

So today I did my biggest shopping EVER, buying things to keep me fed with some variety in my menu (meat, fish and chicken).  I even scored a package of sanitizing wipes.  This will be my new routine: buy enough for two weeks so I don’t have to stop at the store every two days to pick things up for dinner.  Logistics and inventory are my specialties now!

Is it possible to pull a muscle in my leg from pushing that cart around the supermarket?  I think I did.

Now we are all supposed to wear masks when we go anywhere.  And if you don’t sew or have a sewing machine, you can cut up a t-shirt or a sock.  Really?  In a country rich with technology and resources, we are supposed to rely on our own craft skills?  Luckily for me, I have some masks I bought when I had a bad respiratory issue.  But otherwise, I would be having bad flashbacks to junior high Home EC class and that dress I had to make that was so badly done that my mother later sewed up the bottom and made it into a laundry bag.  I am NOT crafty.

Some companies are advertising masks with all kinds of logos on them.  The trademark police should come after them since the prices for some of these cloth masks – not medical grade – can be $20 apiece.  Rip-off!

You will know things are really bad when I start thinking about trimming my own bangs.

The other day my hair came out great, but no one was here to see it.  I wonder what it will look like in a ponytail. My hair is getting long enough that it is starting to flip up in the back. By the time this confinement is over, I will look like Florence Henderson as Carol Brady in The Brady Bunch, only as a brunette – unless my hair is completely gray by then.  Who knows?  I have always wanted to try to let my hair grow and always succumbed to the urge to cut it.  Now? I will have to add hair scrunchies to my shopping list. 

I started this ordeal with brown hair speckled with gray.  Now I have gray hair speckled with brown.

Good news – I checked online, and you can still buy a Flowbee, an electric hair clipper attached to a vacuum, to cut your hair.  Bad news -- the price has been totally jacked up as people get desperate for personal grooming.

My calendar has never looked so blank.  I needed a break, but really, I’m done with that now!

My advice is to do something every day but do it at home.  Stay safe, stay healthy, stay sane, and STAY HOME.

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Tina's March 2020 Movies and More

Here are a few gems to keep you entertained while you are following directive to STAY HOME! Movies marked with an asterisk are ones I had not seen previously. All are rated on a scale on 1-5 cans of tuna fish. Numbering picks up from previous months.

26.  Picture Perfect (1997) – There’s nothing perfect about Kate’s (Jennifer Anniston) life.  She is a hardworking ad exec who is single and lives alone.  Those qualities seem to preclude her as a candidate for advancement.  So when she meets Nick (Jay Mohr), the videographer of a wedding she attends, she prevails on him to pose as her fiancée, inundating him with important information on her life (how she takes her coffee) so she can introduce him to her colleagues and then break up with him, thus giving her the gravitas she needs to impress her bosses.  Meanwhile, she is having a fling with colleague and womanizer Sam (Kevin Bacon).  It doesn’t take long for us to realize that Kate most likely will begin to find Nick someone she can put into her life legitimately.  Very light and moderately charming.  3 cans.
27.  The Way Back* (2020) – A sports redemption pictures go, this is one of the better ones.  Ben Affleck plays Jack Cunningham, former basketball star at the local high school, who is no longer with his wife and has largely separated himself from the people who care for him.  Instead, he shows up at work and drinks, goes home and drinks and goes to the local bar and drinks.  Considering Affleck’s well-publicized personal battles with alcohol, in many ways, this movie wasn’t a stretch for him.  When Jack is asked to take over as the coach of the high school team where he once starred as a player, he rehearses every possible way to turn down the offer.  But he can’t, and instead he emerges as a really good coach who turns the team around.  But can he truly redeem himself and find the way back, or will he slip back into his old habits?  You will have to see this one to find out – and it is worth it.  3½ cans.  This is a good movie, but it is not “Hoosiers,” the ultimate basketball redemption movie.
28.  The Factory* (2020) – When a Chinese company took over an abandoned Ohio GM factory to open Fuyako Glass, the optimism for the success of the partnership was high.  But the Americans hired by the new company and the culture of the Chinese workers and management resulted in a culture clash.  The Chinese were accustomed to exacting standards and long hours, and the Americans did not feel comfortable with the imposed rules.  There were safety issues, union issues and training issues.  The new company was determined to succeed and make a profit, but at what cost?  This is a very absorbing commentary on the working class from two disparate areas of the world, their hopes and aspirations and the reality of business.  Catch it on Netflix.  3½ cans.
29.  The Women of Troy* (2020) – This HBO documentary tells the story of the emergence of women’s college basketball in the 1980s, led by one of the best players of all-time, Cheryl Miller, leads a supremely talented team from the University of Southern California to two consecutive NCAA titles.  Until that time, small schools like Immaculata, outside of Philadelphia, and the Lady Techsters of Louisiana Tech were the elite basketball schools.  But with the adoption of Title IX legislation that required schools to fund men and women equally (and not just in athletics), large schools like USC began to dominate.  If you are a women’s basketball fan, you will be thrilled to see the exploits of the first generation of women superstars, such as Cynthia Cooper, Kim Mulkey, Nancy Lieberman, Miller and her teammates Pam and Paula McGee, who bring athleticism and razzle-dazzle to the women’s game.  This film traces their story on the college level as well as the birth of women’s professional basketball in the US with the formation of the WNBA, affording players an opportunity to continue their post-college basketball careers in the US and make a living.  Catch this one since we all missed March Madness.  4 cans.
30.  The Karate Kid (1984) – Ralph Macchio plays Daniel, a kid from New Jersey who moves with his mom to California, meets the pretty girl at school (Elizabeth Shue) and gets bullied by the blonde surfer dudes who practice karate – on his face.  He is a good kid, just trying to fit in, but the guys won’t give him a chance.  When handyman Mr. Miyagy (Pat Morita) offers to teach him karate, Daniel is willing but dubious of his unconventional training approach, which includes waxing a car (“wax on, wax off”), painting a fence and standing on one leg.  But the skinny kid somehow manages to pull it all together to compete in an under-18 tournament with the bigger and stronger bully boys.  Guess what happens?  3 cans and a cheer for the underdog.
31.  The Heart of the Game (2005) – With the possible exception of “Hoop Dreams,” there is no finer documentary about basketball (or sports, in my opinion) than this 7-year look at Coach Bill Resler and his Roosevelt High Rough Riders in Seattle, Washington.  A college tax professor, Resler takes on the hapless high school girls basketball team and uses an unconventional approach to urge the girls on to victory.  He tells them they are a pack of wolves or tigers, and they abandon traditional offensive sets and swarm the opposition on defense.  When the gifted Darnellia Russell shows up (a year after the documentary starts), she brings her considerable basketball skills and sometimes poor attitude to challenge Resler.  Will they win the state championship?  Will Darnellia overcome her own problems to stay on the team?  I know the outcome and yet every time I watch this movie I am thrilled at each basket, each pass, and each game.  If you like sports and enjoy documentaries, you’ve gotta have “Heart.”  5 cans.
32.  Lost Girls* (2020) – Shannon Gilbert is missing in Long Island, and her mother, Mari (Amy Ryan) is relentless in pushing the police to look for her.  During the search, police find the bodies of three other young women, all prostitutes, dumped and unaccounted for.  The cops need a push so Shannon is not forgotten as police delve further into the work of what may be a serial killer.  Very absorbing and based on a real case.  Ryan is terrific as the ferocious mom.  4 cans.  Netflix.
33.  After the Wedding* (2019) – Isabel (Michelle Williams) is desperate to secure funding for the orphanage she runs in India, so when she is asked to return to NY to discuss a major donation by a potential benefactor, she reluctantly leaves her charges.  In New York, she meets with rich and powerful Theresa (Julianne Moore), who invites her to her daughter’s wedding the next day so they can get to know each other.  But Theresa’s husband (Billy Crudup) already knows Isabel.  That brief description is all I can supply without spoiling the plot.  I hope that’s enough to intrigue you, because the movie is worth seeing.  4 cans.
34.  This is a Game Ladies* (2004) – I would rather be watching my beloved Rutgers Women’s Basketball team on the court, but that is not possible since March Madness has been canceled.  So instead, I viewed this documentary for the first time, thanks to YouTube.  It traces the RUWBB team from right after its loss to Tennessee in the Final Four in 2000 through the next full season with a glimpse of the 2001-2002 squad. Long-time fans will find the familiar faces of Rutgers players from way back and can relive some thrilling victories and agonizing defeats.  Above it all is the dominating figure of Coach C. Vivian Stringer as she encourages, cajoles, challenges and leads her young ladies through a season of highs and lows, with her burning desire to make them successful women.  4 cans, but I am biased on this one!
35.  The Mighty Macs (2009) – This improbable story is one you wouldn’t believe unless you knew it were true.  In 1971, young basketball coach Cathy Rush takes charge of the perennially losing Mighty Macs of tiny Immaculata College outside Philadelphia.  There was no gym and only one basketball.  The uniforms were pinafores with sashes, and the rules had just changed so the players were no longer restricted to just one area of the court as in the past.  NCAA basketball and Title IX did not yet exist.  In this impossible set of circumstances and with an unconventional approach to coaching, Rush, aided by a young nun, turned a very small group of players into champions who dominated the sport for three years.  Former Rutgers Coach Theresa Shank Grentz, a player on those Immaculata teams, has a cameo as the last nun in the pew.  A fun and inspiring story of trust, spirit and innovation.  3½ cans.
36. The Three Faces of Eve (1957) – Joanne Woodward stars in this unusual story of a woman with multiple personalities.  Dowdy housewife Eve White has “spells,” starting with a headache and progressing to blackouts, followed by amnesia.  Dr. Luther (Lee J. Cobb) can’t figure out what is wrong with her, until one day in his office when alter ego Eve Black emerges.  She is a randy woman who flirts with the psychiatrist, who cannot believe what he is seeing.  And Eve Black is not the only one crowded into Eve White’s head; there’s Jane, with no Southern accent, who is the sensible one, and who helps stabilize the situation.  It takes years of therapy and more frequent spells to finally determine the underlying cause of these personalities, which overpower Eve White. Interesting concept and played with enough nuance and sensitivity for Woodward to win the Oscar.   3½ cans because it seems dated and melodramatic now.
37.  Forrest Gump (1994) – This Tom Hanks classic (aside from “Bachelor Party,” has this guy ever made a real dud?) is about life, love, and loss, about celebrating the every man, showing us that we each have some kind of gift to bring to our existence and that you don’t need to be a genius to master life.  Yes, it is a fantasy and I generally avoid fantasies, but it is so heartwarming and poignant that it is irresistible.  I had not seen it in many years. I am glad I took the time. 4½ cans.
38.  Dirty Dancing (1987) – Frances “Baby” Hausman (Jennifer Grey) meets dreamy dancer Johnny Castle (Patrick Swayze) at a Catskills resort, takes one look and becomes a great dancer.  He’s all wrong for her, of course, but he won’t put her in the corner.  Great music and dancing and watching it now makes my heart ache for Swayze.  If you need more detail, just see the movie.  4 cans.
39.   Self-Made* (2020) – Until Madam C. J. Walker (Octavia Spencer) came along with her hair products empire in the early 1900s, there were no female self-made millionaires in the US.  In this Netflix mini-series, Spencer starts as the laundrywoman for Addie, a rich woman with her own hair care business.  She won’t hire Madam Walker to do sales because she does not fit the image of the other African-American women who sell and use her products, so Walker sets off to develop better products and succeeds beyond her rival.  Walker is an industrious woman with a fierce strength, and she never stops battling to build a factory and grow her business.  She hired thousands of black women who went on to their own success, and she was an early philanthropist, giving to historically black colleges such as Spelman.  People have criticized this story, saying it glosses over facts, but I am only judging what I see as a story of a fiercely independent woman who was far ahead of her time.  3½ cans.
40.  The Princess Bride* (1987) – You just don’t find a lot of good, swashbuckling movies anymore, but if you like heroes and villains and damsels in distress, this one will tickle your fancy.  This fantasy is intelligent and very clever with a host of excellent actors who keep their tongues (mostly) out of their cheeks and not overplaying their parts.  The bonus was seeing the young Fred Savage as the grandson listening to his grandfather (Peter Falk) tell this good, old-fashioned story.  There are memorable characters (Wallace Shawn and Many Patinkin as Inigo Montoya) and lines and silly situations, but it all works in an off-kilter, Monty Python kind of way.  Right now, I could use a little fantasy.  I cannot believe I had never seen this one!  3½ cans. (I’d give it a 4 but I don’t LOVE fantasies.)

The NEW March Madness

This month’s blog entry is a bit different than my usual lighthearted fare.  But with the dire news about the spread of the Covid-19 virus surrounding us, I thought it appropriate to reflect on this public health crisis and provide some sourced information to help us all.  The material included here was created by me, with references noted and quoted. 

The is the year when everything changed.

First, Kobe Bryant and his daughter Gianna were among a group of 9 people who lost their lives in a helicopter crash.

And then the corona virus, COVID-19, hit.

One NBA player tested positive and the league immediately suspended its season, with hockey, soccer and other sports leagues following suit.

March Madness Basketball games were canceled and conference tournaments were halted in the middle of games after some were played without spectators, cheerleaders, the band, or the fans providing the homecourt advantage. The Rutgers Men's Basketball team was on the cusp of gaining its first berth in the NCAA Tournament since 1991, only to be left with a premature ending to a magical season.

St. Patrick Day parades have been canceled or rescheduled.  Baseball’s Opening Day has been postponed.

The stock market crashed.

Other than epidemiologists, had you ever heard of the Corona virus or Covid-19?  Yeah, me neither.

Now – and this is subject to change by the time you finish reading this essay – people are dying in Italy, where they have run out of beds and medical care.  People are being diagnosed and dying in this country, too, in your town or a neighboring one, and the situation is likely to get worse before it gets better.

Three people mutinied because someone sneezed on an airplane, ending in a forced landing.

People are sneezing into their coats, stripping toilet paper and hand sanitizer from store shelves, and practicing “social distancing,” thus validating all of the introverts who avoided crowds anyway.  Today I got the last two bananas at my supermarket and nothing to use to make and freeze a meatloaf.  People are hunkering down, hoarding and losing their last bit of sanity.

Concerts, sports events, rallies, weddings and parties are being cancelled.  Who wants to take a cruise with the possibility of being quarantined upon returning if someone on the ship tests positive for the virus?  Or worse.

Flights are being canceled because people are afraid to fly.  And with the tests for the virus being in limited supply, no one knows whether they have been exposed to the virus by a passenger who just hasn’t been diagnosed yet.

Tom Hanks and his wife Rita Wilson announced that they have contracted the virus and are in quarantine in Australia.

Colleges and public schools are closing, leaving college kids with no place to go and no way to get there.  Teachers are scrambling to prepare to teach online.  People will lose their jobs because they have to stay home and take care of their kids instead of picking them up after school.  We may run out of beds in health care facilities, equipment and treatments.

The reality is that no one – even the US, with the best doctors and health care in the world (supposedly) – was prepared to face this worldwide pandemic that has resulted already in thousands of deaths.  Diagnostic tests were not available and the vaccines have not as yet been developed.  And don’t hold your breath waiting for a cure or a vaccine.

According to the industry group Pharmaceutical Research & Manufacturers Association, on average, “it takes at least 10 years for a new medicine to complete the journey from initial discovery to the marketplace, with clinical trials alone taking six to seven years on average.  The average cost to research and develop each successful drug is estimated to be $2.6 billion.”  We don’t have that kind of time.

The threat of further outbreaks remains a reality as we have finally caught up with our own failure to take precautions with our health.  Our lack of good hygiene doesn’t help.  The CDC says that only 31 percent of men and 65 percent of women wash their hands after using the bathroom. WebMD on its website lists the “12 Hot Spots for Germs,” and they are things many of us experience every day, like using a touch screen to order food or touching the restaurant menu, using those explosive hand dryers (for those who actually wash their hands) or working out at the gym on equipment where the virus’ germs may reside for a period of time.

According to a four-year study conducted by the University of Arizona’s Environmental Research Lab and sponsored by Clorox, “Grocery carts are veritable petri dishes teeming with human saliva, mucus, urine, fecal matter, as well as the blood and juices from raw meat. Swabs taken from the handles and child seats of 36 grocery carts in San Francisco, Chicago, Tucson, and Tampa showed these common surfaces to rank third on the list of nastiest public items to touch, with only playground equipment and the armrests on public transportation producing more disgusting results. In terms of playing host to germs and bacteria, the carts are far worse than public bathrooms, which at least are cleaned more often. Bacteria and viruses such as E. coli, staphylococcus, salmonella, and influenza can live on grocery carts, a sorry fact most shoppers are blissfully unaware of.”  That’s OK, the grocery shelves are bare anyway by now.

Some further advice suggests maintaining a 2-week supply of food in the house in case you are quarantined, stocking up on prescriptions you might need during that period and buying over-the-counter meds to treat the symptoms you may contract.

Many stores offer antibacterial wipes these days. Use them.  If you are lucky you might find a package of wipes or a bottle of sanitizer on the shelf.  Many of us who were careful before the invasion of the virus but who were not exactly germophobes now have begun to rethink how we can minimize our exposure to germs in general and to the Covid-19 virus specifically.

The World Health Organization says:

“Practice respiratory hygiene.  Make sure you, and the people around you, follow good respiratory hygiene. This means covering your mouth and nose with your bent elbow or tissue when you cough or sneeze. Then dispose of the used tissue immediately.

“Why? Droplets spread virus. By following good respiratory hygiene practices, you protect the people around you from viruses such as cold, flu and COVID-19."

When I think of all the times someone accidentally spit on me during a conversation, I shudder.

The WHO continues: 

“Stay home if you feel unwell. If you have a fever, cough and difficulty breathing, seek medical attention and call in advance. Follow the directions of your local health authority.  National and local authorities will have the most up-to-date information on the situation in your area. Calling in advance will allow your health care provider to quickly direct you to the right health facility. This will also protect you and help prevent spread of viruses and other infections.”

We are told to wash our hands for at least 20 seconds. Lady Macbeth didn’t wring her hands as much as I do now, followed by an application of lotion to prevent dryness and cracking.  I saw online a diagram of how to wash our hands properly and realized that at nearly 70 years old, I had not been doing it right.

Stay away from crowds and don’t wear a mask unless you have symptoms but do use hand sanitizer before and after any possible exposure.  Last week, as I was flying home, a passenger was wiping down her seat like it was going to be used for surgery.  And I had no idea how many times my hands touched my face in the course of a day, which we are told to avoid.

Now I wonder if I could have been exposed to the virus at the BIG 10 Women’s Basketball Tournament, which was held the week before all hell broke loose.  If it takes two weeks to develop the virus, I’m smack in the middle of that window.

If you do have symptoms, see your doctor and self-quarantine for two weeks.  Watch movies, read books, take a walk, do deep-breathing to help stay as relaxed as possible, and wait.  Call your friends and family and use social media to stay in touch since most gatherings are discouraged. Donate to your local food bank, where supplies are limited and donations are down.

I’m not minimizing the severity of this situation by any means, but I am hopeful that we will change our behavior as individuals to improve our hygiene short- and long-term.  And I am hopeful that we will get this pandemic under control, because it is deadly.

What a year!  And it is only March.  

Meanwhile, stay safe, stay healthy and stay connected.

Tina's February 2020 Movies and More

I guess seeing 11 movies in a short month (even though it was Leap Year) is not a bad record, but fewer than my normal total. movies not seen previously are noted wiyh an asterisk (*) and the rating system goes from 1-5 cans of tuna, with 5 the top rating.
15.  Parasite* (2019) – I know it got the Oscar for Best Picture and a bunch more accolades, but there was little I liked about this movie.  Yes, it was a very original story and well presented, but it did not hold my interest.  I was not interested in the story and I don’t enjoy having to read the movie in the subtitles.  Just not my cup of tea. 2 cans for the direction and originality.
16.  Vick* (2020) – If you recognize the name Michael Vick, it is probably in conjunction with his conviction for conducting a dog-fighting business on his property, rather than because he was a gifted pro football player.  This ESPN documentary, part of the “30 for 30” series, take a deep dive into Vick’s life and background, coming from an impoverished area and climbing to incredible wealth and fame, all of which came crashing down around him as a result of his self-acknowledged stupid decision to allow dog-fighting in his compound.  Originally from Virginia, where dog-fighting is at least somewhat accepted, Vick allowed the old friends to move into his home and have the run of the house and property in the dog business, building kennels and featuring ghoulish fights between dogs.  He was aware but not as deeply involved as the others, and as he saw himself go quickly from the top of his profession to prison and bankruptcy, he was genuinely contrite.  Many stories have the “rise and fall” arc, and this one is no exception.  Vick is interesting because his abilities on the football field paved the way for future outstanding young, Black quarterbacks who can pass and run with equal skill.  Vick was blessed with amazing athletic ability, but little concern with proper training or even how his money was being spent.  This is a 2-part documentary that runs for a total of 4 hours, but worth the time.  3½ cans.
17.  JoJo Rabbit* (2020) – JoJo (Roman Griffin Davis) is a fresh-faced 10-year old living in Germany with his mother and his imaginary friend, Adolf Hitler (Taika Waititi, who wrote and directed the film).  Although he is so young, JoJo has his own political beliefs and he thoroughly endorses the Nazis, even though his mother (Scarlett Johanssen) is hiding a teenaged Jewish girl (Thomasin McKenzie) in their house.  His mother is sympathetic towards the persecuted young woman and Jews in general, while young JoJo is a Nazi sympathizer.  Hitler is hilarious – if you can imagine that – and this satire looks in parts as if Monty Python had a hand in the script.  At one point, the Nazis have to round up German Shepherds, and instead of dogs, they show up with actual shepherds.  It is not all fun and games, as war is serious stuff, and the lonely little boy finds himself with just one friend, another young boy who supports the Nazis as the war winds down.  This movie has a very fresh approach and is a constant reminder that we have to be taught to hate, to ridicule and disparage people who are not exactly like us.  You can’t help thinking of the climate here in this country right now, with antisemitism and racism now so openly practiced.  Young Davis gives a superb performance in his role as JoJo.  Expect to see him on the screen often.  4 cans.
18.  Running Scared (1986) – Rarely has an action movie proved so amusing, largely because of the unmistakable chemistry between Chicago cops Ray and Danny (Gregory Hines and Billy Crystal).  The two are trailing a drug kingpin Julio (Jimmy Smits) and nearly get killed in a shootout, when their car chases Julio on the El line tracks, and when it ends up in a car crusher.  The two actors – best known as a dancer and a comedian – are captivating as they work against the bad guys and even fellow officers to bring down the drug dealer.  This movie is so old now that Ray talks on a cell phone the size of a large sneaker, but it remains a treat in the action drama buddy genre.  3½ cans.
19.  Unknown (2011) – Here’s what I know: Never get into a cab, an elevator, a car, a train or anywhere else if Liam Neeson is there.  This guy gets himself into and out of impossible situations.  Here he is Dr. Martin Harris, a scientist who arrives with his wife (January Jones) in Berlin for a conference and loses his briefcase and nearly his mind.  The “coincidences” that take place here are beyond the scope of reality, as he gets into an accident on his way back to the airport to retrieve his suitcase, is saved by the heroic cab driver (Diane Kruger) but winds up in the hospital with no identification.  (The thought that he could get treated without insurance may be the most mind-boggling aspect of the movie.)  When he gets back to the hotel, no one can confirm his identity, including his wife (January Jones), who is now on the arm of another main who claims to be Martin – and this guy (Aidan Quinn) has a valid passport.  Go figure.  Although parts of the plot seemed preposterous, the movie has enough suspense to hold your interest and dare you to follow it.  Just stay away from Neeson!  3½ cans.
20.  The Queen (2006) – Helen Mirren does a masterful job in portraying Queen Elizabeth II in this recounting of the death of Princess Diana in 1997.  The Queen and her husband, Prince Philip, are away with her son, Prince Charles and “the boys,” Princes William and Harry when the fatal car accident occurs in Paris.  Divorced from Prince Charles, Diana was no longer welcome in the Royal Family, and the Queen had no intention of noting her passing, no less celebrating her life, until newly elected Prime Minister Tony Blair (Michael Sheen) works some diplomatic magic to persuade her to appropriately mark the devastating loss of what he called “The People’s Princess.”  The coldness of the Royal Family is evident, although the Queen would have you believe she was only trying to keep her grandsons’ bests interest at heart.  If not for Blair’s common sense approach and his increasing sympathy for the monarch, there might have been mutiny against the Crown.  3½ cans.
21.  Tell Me Who I Am* (2019) – Twin brothers Alex and Marcus are close, which is invaluable when Alex has a devastating accident that wipes out most of his memory.  He trusts Marcus to fill in all of the gaps, which Marcus willingly does.  But his recounting of their childhood and later life omits some of the reality of their lives together, which Alex resents when he realizes that Marcus has lied to him for many years.  This is a true and painful story.  You could not make this stuff up.  Fascinating.  3½ cans.  Available on Netflix.
22.  Fatal Attraction (1987) – It has been 33 years since Glenn Close came unglued in this suspenseful thriller about a one-night stand gone awry.  Lawyer Dan (Michael Douglas, looking 33 years younger, virile and gorgeous), has an intense sexual encounter with a business associate while his wife is out of town.  Alex (Close) has decided she wants him for more than one night or weekend, even though he is clear about being a happily married husband (to Anne Archer) and father.  That’s not enough for Alex, who becomes increasingly threatening and violent as she tries anything to keep Dan in her life.  I had not seen this one in years, but it holds up.  Better than Douglas, at that.  4 cans.
23.  D Wade: Life Unexpected* (2020) – Contrary to the title, this ESPN documentary was not only expected, it was produced over the long career of all-star basketball player Dwayne Wade, with film shot throughout his career.  Born and raised in Chicago, young phenom Wade had to overcome enormous challenges of poverty and a mother with a drug addiction.  Somehow, those obstacles spurred him on to greatness, as he vowed to succeed and never follow his mother’s behavior.  Wade is a good guy, devoted to his children, always encouraging them and accepting them.  The film documents his rise from a gifted high school player through college and the pros.  I would say the only limitation here is that if you are not a basketball fan, you might not even recognize his name, but if you are, finding out more about D Wade is illuminating.  3½ cans.
24.  David Crosby: Remember My Name* (2019) – A creative dynamo addicted to music and drugs, the musician and member of both Crosby, Stills and Nash and CSN & Young (when they added Neil Young), Crosby lives his life in wonder, mostly wondering what the hell happened.  He has many regrets about his behavior and time lost to his severe drug habit, which landed him in prison (which probably saved his life).  Beyond the examination of the adventures of his life, those he loved and lost (including his treasured bandmates, Steven Stills, Graham Nash and Neil Young), much of this documentary (but not enough, in my opinion) focuses on the incredible music he and the bands wrote and performed.  They have a remarkable catalog of popular and meaningful music that defined a generation and the rise of the California sound.  I’ll remember his name for sure.  3½ cans.
25.  The Assistant* (2020) – Julie Garner plays the title role, a young, aspiring movie producer who has taken a job as an assistant to a nameless man (always referred to as “He,” as in “Is he in?”) clearly modeled on convicted sexual predator Harvey Weinstein.  The assistant has the most mundane job imaginable, working long hours making copies, washing the office dishes and making lots and lots of arrangements, including booking private flights for the Big Boss Man, getting him to places from his various homes and offices, and using Fabreze to clean stains off the couch (one of the male assistants – who seem higher up on the human bondage scale here – warns, “never sit on the couch.”)  But when the assistant is charged with picking up a young woman with whom Mr. Big seems to have established a relationship and getting her into a fancy hotel, she knows what is going on behind the closed doors.  So does everyone else, but with their futures on the line, no one wants to drop a dime on the Boss.  Garner plays the role with either a bland or fearful expression on her face as she goes about her daily chores, just one of the nameless, faceless assistants (no character in this film even has a name; just lots of pronouns) going nowhere but afraid of getting out of the queue headed for success.  I don’t think this movie could have been made even five years ago; I’m not sure it should have been made today, but it certainly shows a toxic workplace and the misogyny that exists in the office.  One more thing – and this is a pet peeve of mine – I have never seen real offices as poorly lit as the one portrayed here.  It is a common practice in TV shows and movies to show characters working in offices illuminated only by lamps, but in the real world, it is all about ceiling lights that are harsh and unattractive but which provide the light necessary to work!  3 cans and a brighter bulb, please!

February 2020 Message from Tina - Just Wondering

I’m pretty sure that yesterday was National Slow Shoppers Day at ShopRite, with people just strolling along leisurely with their carts. That’s surprising, since snow is predicted for tomorrow evening (Note: at the time this was originally written, that was the case), and that usually means the store will be stripped of milk, eggs, water, etc., in anticipation that everyone will be housebound until spring.  My sister always says that there should be a cash register designated for “People doing their regular shopping” to avoid the survivalists who don’t expect to leave the house for months.   

Last week it was National Talk on Your Phone While You Shop Day, with almost everyone in the store yammering away.  I wonder if any of them were talking to each other.  I’m too busy using my phone to check my shopping list on Alexa, so I can’t talk.

Why is it that we cannot be stitious but we can be superstitious?

Sometimes I wish life was like my TV remote, where I could tap the button and get a brief rewind.  Miss something in a movie?  Press that rewind.  What were the specials in the restaurant?  Tap that remote.  What on earth was she talking about? One more time, please.

Have you ever noticed that the term “pay per view” sounds just like “paper view?”

I don’t understand how someone can survive without a DVR.  I automatically record a ton of programs so I can watch them later and skip the commercials.  Even if I am home, I don’t watch "Jeopardy" live.  I can see it in 20 minutes on the DVR.  Often, I will start watching the recording of a show while it is still on so I can skip the commercials and finish watching just as the live show ends.  The DVR is invaluable for awards shows, but I’m always too eager to know who won so I have to watch live.  I even record basketball games I have attended so I can rewatch the parts where I think the ref made a bad call or when there is an amazing play I want to see again.  I’d be lost without my DVR.

My secret fantasy is to go into everyone’s house in this community and open their refrigerator to see how they have it organized.  I don’t have nearly as much stuff crammed into mine as most people, but I know I could better organize what is there.

Don’t you think it would be helpful if books came with “org charts” to show the names and relationships between characters?  You’re welcome.

Here is the problem with being in a book club: We have read so many books that when we go to select a new one, no one remembers what we have already read.  And our group keeps a list!  It is worse on the Kindle, where you don't have a book cover to remind you of the name of the book.  If someone asks what I am reading, I have to go look it up!

I have always been curious about how medical records are kept.  As you sign in to the doctor’s office, you see shelves stuffed with folders with letters and color codes.  I have always wondered what that means.  Are they alphabetical?  Or do they mark the really bad patients with red on the folder?  Just wondering.

I am the perfect audience for any book, play or movie “whodunit.”  I am easily led to where the author leads, I fall for every red herring (and why are false clues called red herrings?), certain I’m heading in the right direction, and I smack myself in the head when I realize what I have done wrong.  The last thing I got right in a murder mystery was when it turned out to actually be Professor Plum in the conservatory with the lead pipe.

I was very upset about something the other day and decided to throw caution to the wind and do something daring.  So, I bought a grapefruit!  I take Lipitor for high cholesterol, and I’m not supposed to eat grapefruit, which apparently gets in the way of the medication working.  At age 69, buying and eating a grapefruit is my version of YOLO (you only live once).

Every time I see a report that Bed Bath and Beyond is closing stores, I begin to panic.  I don’t want to buy towels from a catalog or on-line, even from my beloved Amazon.  I want to feel them for softness, examine the colors and hold them in my hands.  Sure, I buy bags for my Simple Human garbage can online, but I want to wander through the store, sniffing the Yankee candles, looking at the placemats I don’t need and thinking about whether it is time for a new comforter set.  I remember going to a girls’ weekend with my friends and one brought a big container of margarita mix that she said she had bought at BB&B.  I guess it came from the “Beyond” aisle!  And those coupons!  I have enough to last the rest of my life.  Not toting them around with me would seem so unnatural!  Please don’t close any of the stores near me, BB&B!

I know nothing about lacrosse.  I’m not even sure they played it in my high school.  But whenever I see lacrosse highlights on TV, I never can follow the action.  The ball goes into that tiny little net so fast that I have never seen it cross the goal line (if that is even the right jargon).  I know more about hockey, but I can’t see the puck go into the net there, either.

Speaking of sports, I have a guilty sports pleasure: I watch “American Ninja Warrior” on TV.  These people look almost like regular folks.  They don’t have uniforms.  Some even wear jeans or cotton pants as they navigate a crazy course with all kinds of impossible looking obstacles.  They climb, jump and seemingly fly through the course as if it were normal to maneuver through a glass tunnel by pressing your hands and feet on the glass walls, and they do this with speed and fearlessness (although it’s not like alligators are in the water below).  Some of the competitors have opened training facilities to practice the course and its obstacles, and since they are constantly changing, I don’t know how they keep up.  These athletes are not huge and highly muscled.  Many were gymnasts and are remarkably fit.  I don’t know what attracts me to this competition, but I’m glued to the TV watching it.  Who would have thought?

Have you noticed how many insurance companies do commercials with “characters?”  Aside from Flo from Progressive, there is the ubiquitous gecko from Geico (along with as many characters in total as there were actors in Ben Hur) the “General” from General, and Limu the Emu and his human sidekick, Doug.  There is the annoying Pinocchio character (a Geico one, again) and how many more to sell insurance?  State Farm has its agents hanging out with celebrity customers like Aaron Rodgers and Patrick Mahomes.  I do admit that I like the State Farm commercial where “Sheryl” is upset because her “she-shed” burned down but she is assured it will be replaced. Bear in mind that none of this stuff would happen in your favor if YOUR she-shed burned down.

I love Amazon!  Aside from my endless appreciation that the company hired my nephew right out of college (even though they are working him to death), Amazon provides goods and services we didn’t even know we needed.  When I was looking for a case for my new phone, I found just what I wanted and had it on the phone 24 hours later.  When the cord for the phone charger I bought on Amazon was too short to fit my needs, I initiated the online return and dropped it off at Kohl’s, where I bought something with the coupon Kohl’s gave me for letting them handle my transaction.  No repacking the item and hauling it to the UPS store with a label; Kohl’s handles that part. They can track your delivery; today I got a message saying that mine had 7 more stops before it would arrive.  When my package arrived here, my Alexa – also courtesy of Amazon – notified me and sent me a message on my phone with a picture of the package on my door mat.  I download the books my book club reads onto my Kindle so I can take along something to read while I am in the waiting room at the doctor’s office or the car dealership.  And I take advantage of Amazon Prime Video by enjoying “The Marvelous Mrs. Mazel” and other series and movies.  I feel torn by the fact that the retail industry is suffering at the hands of this behemoth, and I would still rather go to a store and feel the quality of towels or try on clothes, but the convenience of finding and purchasing so many things I’d never find in a bricks and mortar location just can’t be beat.  And to top it off, when I buy something on Amazon Smile, the company gives a very modest contribution to my Alumnae Association or virtually any charity of your choice.  And my nephew will celebrate his 5th year of employment this summer.  Thanks, Amazon!