It is summer, so in a bow to one of the few girlie things I do (wearing perfume being the most prominent), it’s time for a mani-pedi. Off I go to the nail salon.
Remember back in the day when people had their hair “done” on a weekly basis? My mother made me have mine “done” for my senior picture in high school, and I emerged from the rollers, the rocket ship-looking hair dryer and enough hair spray to seriously damage the ozone layer looking nothing like I actually looked on any given day in high school. I have since been immortalized in the yearbook looking the way my hair looked for three hours on that one day. But I digress. Those were the days when manicurists were all like “Madge” in those Palmolive commercials, the ones where the ladies soaked their hands in Palmolive before Madge would do their nails while they gossiped – in English.
Times have changed.
Madge is long gone, and so, for the most part, are manicurists who work in what we used to call “beauty parlors” (I believe that term had to be dropped right after my hair was “done” for the yearbook picture). We get our nails done at a nail salon, ubiquitous storefront operations that pop up, along with pizza joints, dry cleaners and Chinese take-out places, at virtually any strip mall you can find. At least in New Jersey, that is. The “nail technicians,” if that’s what we can them, all speak English as a second language, and generally work for a woman named Kim. I’m pretty sure that is a legal requirement to own and operate a nail business.
This of course reminds me of the episode of Seinfeld where Elaine was sure the nail technicians were talking about her behind her back but, in this case, in front of her face. And if Elaine were your customer, you’d talk about her, too.
The technicians, upon arriving in this country from wherever they may hail, first learn the most important English phrase in their vocabulary: “Pick a color.” This is the single biggest decision a woman can make. The choice depends on the season, the length of the nails, the age of the person getting them done (I saw a nine-year old having her nails done in a neon lime color the other day), and what we have planned, like matching the nails with a certain outfit. But that is far from the only decision. Should the finger and toenails match? Do we want a French manicure – which I fear will result in boorish behavior on the part of the technician – a gel manicure, acrylics, wraps or nail “art?” The latter consists of using tiny brushes and a million little bottles of color to create anything from a snowman to a flower to a peace sign on the nail to make it, well, artsy, I guess. We can pay extra for a spa manicure, where they apply lotion and massage the feet and hands, or we can add a special topcoat that will protect the nails even longer – even though mine almost always are ruined by the time I turn the key in the ignition of the car as I leave the salon.
I try to do this right, even though my heels hurt as they are massaged because of my plantar fasciitis, and I am ticklish, so touching my feet makes me squirm. I bring my own polish so when my nails chip 10 minutes after I get home I can retouch them. I don’t wear a watch so they can massage my hands and arms. I don the shortest capris I have, which for me is an issue since most just look like shorter long pants on my stubby little legs. I wear my flip flops, which I wear exclusively to get a pedicure, and I put my credit card and money in my pocket so I don’t have to reach into my purse to pay (the second phrase all technicians must learn upon arrival in the U.S. is, “You pay now,” which they remind you after the initial work is done but before the polish is applied).
The whole experience is quite a process, and though we pay for the service, sometimes we forget who is in charge. Once a friend of mine had a manicure and upon leaving, headed straight to another nail joint for a “color change” since she was too embarrassed to admit she hated the color she selected.
Sure, you can do this yourself, and occasionally I try, but the cuticles never cooperate and my left hand isn’t all that helpful when working on my right hand. You can tell I have done it myself when the polish is clear, which usually is meant only to keep them strong enough to last until I can get a manicure.
Between the chlorine in the pool and the ordinary wear and tear on my hands, and not even considering that my nails seem to grow much faster in the summer, my nails will look good for approximately 3 days. After that, the chips appear, the cuticles split, and, let’s face it, I have no future as a hand model. But for those three days, as Shania says, “Man, I feel like a woman.”
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Tina's May Movies - June 2010
It was a good month for documentaries once again, as well as a movie I had never seen ("The Old Man and the Sea" and one I never miss "Rudy." Here's how I spent my time during May:
May
53. Feast of Love (TV) – This movie about relationships stars Morgan Freeman and Greg Kinear, who both bring their considerable charm to a bittersweet tale. The problem is that there is so much foreboding that I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, which affected my enjoyment of the film. This movie is one that I hadn’t even heard of, but I figured anything with Morgan Freeman can’t be all bad. Feast had its moments, but I’m not sure I’d go back for seconds. 3½ cans.
54. The Kid Stays in the Picture (HBO) – Hollywood producer Robert Evans offers a fascinating account of his life that is equal parts biography and bombast. From a successful career in women’s clothing (Evan-Picone, but take that any way you like) to becoming a strictly B actor, he ended up as a producer and the very young head of Paramount Pictures. There he claims credit for saving the ailing studio with such hits as “Rosemary’s Baby,” “Love Story” and “The Godfather.” His meteoric rise was followed by a predictably precipitous fall, as he lost his wife Ali McGraw to hot star Steve McQueen, got busted for drugs, sunk money into the disaster that was “The Cotton Club” and lost his beloved home when his career nosedived. This guy has had more lives than a cat, and he unabashedly shares his triumphs and failures here. 3½ cans.
55. The Cooler (TV) – Bernie, the sad sack played by William H. Macy, is such a loser that his mere presence can cool off anyone’s hot streak in the Vegas casino where he works. That is, until Lady Luck, in the form of a waitress played by Maria Bello, comes along. He gets lucky (take that any way you want), which turns out not to be so lucky for a guy who is paid to be a loser. Casino boss Alec Baldwin runs the casino old school style, which means Bernie’s luck is about to run out. 3½ cans.
56. Days of Wine and Roses (TCM) – This sobering tale about the demons of drinking features Jack Lemmon as a PR man whose life careens between frenetic and pathetic. He and his wife (Lee Remick), who initially drinks only because he doesn’t want to drink alone, descend into the depths of alcoholism. The lesson here: You are only one step away from ruin when drinking dominates your life. On the other hand, you are only 12 steps away from helping yourself once you face up to being an alcoholic. A sad, disturbing and difficult film to watch, but well-played by all, and directed by Blake Edwards, better known more for such frothy fare as “The Pink Panther.” 4 cans.
57. Babies (in Manville with Dee) – Short and very sweet, this unscripted movie documents the birth and growth of four babies from four continents during their first year. Despite immense differences in cultural backgrounds, the babies are all very much the same in their eagerness to explore the world around them, cry for food, laugh at things that amuse them and, generally, act like little babies. Whether it is playing with a rock in Africa or attending a Gymboree-type class in San Francisco, these babies show us the miracle that is life and the wonder of it all. Oooh, baby, baby. 3½ cans.
58. Letters to Juliet (in Hillsborough with Dee and Angela) – I won’t bog you down with the details of this tale of lost love. The movie stars Dakota Fanning look-alike (but older) Amanda Seyfried as engaged yet ringless Sophie, who is to marry would-be restaurateur Victor. On a trip to Italy, Victor spends most of his time visiting his suppliers and exalting the food and wine of Italy, while Sophie gets involved helping Clare, played by the elegant and gracious Vanessa Redgrave, find her long-lost (50 years) love (her actual long-lost love, Franco Nero). Accompanying them is Vanessa’s priggish Brit of a grandson, an actor whose name escapes me and is best forgotten and who bears an uncanny resemblance to the late Heath Ledger but with better enunciation. The story, acting and dialog (which ends with one of the cheesiest lines I have ever heard) are largely forgettable, but if you appreciate the beauty of Italy, the road trip alone is worth seeing. 3 cans, made better with a good bottle of wine and some Italian food.
59. Rudy (TV) – There are scenes in movies that you know are coming (because you’ve seen them before) but they get you anyway. I think of Gregory Peck leaving the courtroom in “To Kill a Mockingbird,” Tim Robbins escaping Shawshank or a smirky Dustin Hoffman at the back of the bus with Elaine in “The Graduate.” “Rudy” is a movie based on a true story of a kid not smart enough to be accepted by Notre Dame and too small to play football there. So, of course, he gets into Notre Dame, ends up on the practice squad and inspires his more athletic teammates. The last game of his senior year is down to the final seconds when the crowd, chanting “Rudy, Rudy,” beseeches the coach to put him in. On his one and only play from scrimmage, he sacks the quarterback and is hoisted up by his teammates and carried off the field, the last player to be so honored at Notre Dame. My throat is getting that giant lump again. It’s a great scene and worth 5 cans on its own, while the movie itself, a bit too long and slow, gets 4 cans.
60. Hotel Gramercy Park (Sundance Channel) – Proving the adage that “everything old is new again,” this documentary takes a look at New York’s once tony but ultimately rundown Gramercy Park Hotel. Owned by the Weissberg family, who lived above the store (so to speak), the hotel was favored by rock stars, artists and an odd collection of people who still reside there full-time. We witness the new owner, hotelier Ian Schrager (the former owner, with partner Steve Rubell, of Studio 54) as he takes the hotel from decrepit to divine, even as the long-time residents are forced to sidestep the ongoing construction and lack of elevators, etc. One unique perk the hotel offers is a private park. Residents actually have keys to open the gates of this Manhattan oasis. Interesting (especially when Schrager goes toe-to-toe with artist Julian Schnabel on design), but too much emphasis on the family and its many problems. After checking this out, I won’t be checking in. 3 cans.
61. The Old Man and the Sea (TCM) – Spencer Tracy stars in this movie about one man, one boat, and one whale of a marlin, bigger than the tiny fishing boat but not bigger than the will of the fisherman. For days and nights, the old man battles the fish, the elements, his bloody, cramping hands and his fatigue before the fish finally succumbs to his will. But sometimes you win the battle and lose the war, as the fisherman soon realizes. Beautifully shot, this film, from the novel by Ernest Hemingway that everyone had to read at some point in school, is a study in man’s determination as well as where we fit in the universe. I think I’ll get my fish from the market. 4 cans.
62. Visual Acoustics (Sundance Channel) – I love photography and admire architecture, and this documentary about renowned architectural photographer Julius Shulman features both. Working with acclaimed architects from Frank Lloyd Wright to Frank Gehry, Shulman documented the modern architecture that largely defined southern California from the 40s on while enhancing the work and acceptance of a myriad of famous architects and others just starting out. A brilliant essay on a man with a clear focus on straight lines, lighting and some of the most spectacular homes in America. This movie won’t appeal to everyone, but it fascinated me. 4 cans.
May
53. Feast of Love (TV) – This movie about relationships stars Morgan Freeman and Greg Kinear, who both bring their considerable charm to a bittersweet tale. The problem is that there is so much foreboding that I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, which affected my enjoyment of the film. This movie is one that I hadn’t even heard of, but I figured anything with Morgan Freeman can’t be all bad. Feast had its moments, but I’m not sure I’d go back for seconds. 3½ cans.
54. The Kid Stays in the Picture (HBO) – Hollywood producer Robert Evans offers a fascinating account of his life that is equal parts biography and bombast. From a successful career in women’s clothing (Evan-Picone, but take that any way you like) to becoming a strictly B actor, he ended up as a producer and the very young head of Paramount Pictures. There he claims credit for saving the ailing studio with such hits as “Rosemary’s Baby,” “Love Story” and “The Godfather.” His meteoric rise was followed by a predictably precipitous fall, as he lost his wife Ali McGraw to hot star Steve McQueen, got busted for drugs, sunk money into the disaster that was “The Cotton Club” and lost his beloved home when his career nosedived. This guy has had more lives than a cat, and he unabashedly shares his triumphs and failures here. 3½ cans.
55. The Cooler (TV) – Bernie, the sad sack played by William H. Macy, is such a loser that his mere presence can cool off anyone’s hot streak in the Vegas casino where he works. That is, until Lady Luck, in the form of a waitress played by Maria Bello, comes along. He gets lucky (take that any way you want), which turns out not to be so lucky for a guy who is paid to be a loser. Casino boss Alec Baldwin runs the casino old school style, which means Bernie’s luck is about to run out. 3½ cans.
56. Days of Wine and Roses (TCM) – This sobering tale about the demons of drinking features Jack Lemmon as a PR man whose life careens between frenetic and pathetic. He and his wife (Lee Remick), who initially drinks only because he doesn’t want to drink alone, descend into the depths of alcoholism. The lesson here: You are only one step away from ruin when drinking dominates your life. On the other hand, you are only 12 steps away from helping yourself once you face up to being an alcoholic. A sad, disturbing and difficult film to watch, but well-played by all, and directed by Blake Edwards, better known more for such frothy fare as “The Pink Panther.” 4 cans.
57. Babies (in Manville with Dee) – Short and very sweet, this unscripted movie documents the birth and growth of four babies from four continents during their first year. Despite immense differences in cultural backgrounds, the babies are all very much the same in their eagerness to explore the world around them, cry for food, laugh at things that amuse them and, generally, act like little babies. Whether it is playing with a rock in Africa or attending a Gymboree-type class in San Francisco, these babies show us the miracle that is life and the wonder of it all. Oooh, baby, baby. 3½ cans.
58. Letters to Juliet (in Hillsborough with Dee and Angela) – I won’t bog you down with the details of this tale of lost love. The movie stars Dakota Fanning look-alike (but older) Amanda Seyfried as engaged yet ringless Sophie, who is to marry would-be restaurateur Victor. On a trip to Italy, Victor spends most of his time visiting his suppliers and exalting the food and wine of Italy, while Sophie gets involved helping Clare, played by the elegant and gracious Vanessa Redgrave, find her long-lost (50 years) love (her actual long-lost love, Franco Nero). Accompanying them is Vanessa’s priggish Brit of a grandson, an actor whose name escapes me and is best forgotten and who bears an uncanny resemblance to the late Heath Ledger but with better enunciation. The story, acting and dialog (which ends with one of the cheesiest lines I have ever heard) are largely forgettable, but if you appreciate the beauty of Italy, the road trip alone is worth seeing. 3 cans, made better with a good bottle of wine and some Italian food.
59. Rudy (TV) – There are scenes in movies that you know are coming (because you’ve seen them before) but they get you anyway. I think of Gregory Peck leaving the courtroom in “To Kill a Mockingbird,” Tim Robbins escaping Shawshank or a smirky Dustin Hoffman at the back of the bus with Elaine in “The Graduate.” “Rudy” is a movie based on a true story of a kid not smart enough to be accepted by Notre Dame and too small to play football there. So, of course, he gets into Notre Dame, ends up on the practice squad and inspires his more athletic teammates. The last game of his senior year is down to the final seconds when the crowd, chanting “Rudy, Rudy,” beseeches the coach to put him in. On his one and only play from scrimmage, he sacks the quarterback and is hoisted up by his teammates and carried off the field, the last player to be so honored at Notre Dame. My throat is getting that giant lump again. It’s a great scene and worth 5 cans on its own, while the movie itself, a bit too long and slow, gets 4 cans.
60. Hotel Gramercy Park (Sundance Channel) – Proving the adage that “everything old is new again,” this documentary takes a look at New York’s once tony but ultimately rundown Gramercy Park Hotel. Owned by the Weissberg family, who lived above the store (so to speak), the hotel was favored by rock stars, artists and an odd collection of people who still reside there full-time. We witness the new owner, hotelier Ian Schrager (the former owner, with partner Steve Rubell, of Studio 54) as he takes the hotel from decrepit to divine, even as the long-time residents are forced to sidestep the ongoing construction and lack of elevators, etc. One unique perk the hotel offers is a private park. Residents actually have keys to open the gates of this Manhattan oasis. Interesting (especially when Schrager goes toe-to-toe with artist Julian Schnabel on design), but too much emphasis on the family and its many problems. After checking this out, I won’t be checking in. 3 cans.
61. The Old Man and the Sea (TCM) – Spencer Tracy stars in this movie about one man, one boat, and one whale of a marlin, bigger than the tiny fishing boat but not bigger than the will of the fisherman. For days and nights, the old man battles the fish, the elements, his bloody, cramping hands and his fatigue before the fish finally succumbs to his will. But sometimes you win the battle and lose the war, as the fisherman soon realizes. Beautifully shot, this film, from the novel by Ernest Hemingway that everyone had to read at some point in school, is a study in man’s determination as well as where we fit in the universe. I think I’ll get my fish from the market. 4 cans.
62. Visual Acoustics (Sundance Channel) – I love photography and admire architecture, and this documentary about renowned architectural photographer Julius Shulman features both. Working with acclaimed architects from Frank Lloyd Wright to Frank Gehry, Shulman documented the modern architecture that largely defined southern California from the 40s on while enhancing the work and acceptance of a myriad of famous architects and others just starting out. A brilliant essay on a man with a clear focus on straight lines, lighting and some of the most spectacular homes in America. This movie won’t appeal to everyone, but it fascinated me. 4 cans.
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